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Best self-help books for men with confidence/esteem issues? watch

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    I've been looking into these books, but I'm a bit of a cynic. I really can't be doing with anything wishy-washy, the sort of "follow your dreams" and "tell yourself you are brilliant" CBT that most books seem to offer, which is exactly why I gave up on counselling, I just don't find it helpful, only patronising.

    As a guy I guess I'd prefer something thats a bit more to the point (most books seem to be written by women, for women).

    I've been reading reviews for Paul Mckennas "Instant Confidence". Has anyone tried this, or have any other recommendations.
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    Personally i dont think a book can substitute for a professionals opinons and help. If you are really struggling with self esteem and confidence it may be worth going to your GP with the idea of being refered to a counsellor if they feel fit, they will be able to help you alot more then a book will, a book will give you the principles but putting them into practice is another matter really, this is where the help of the counsellor may be useful.
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    I've heard good things about Paul Mckennas book like you said,never tried it myself.
    Get yourself a job, that will improve your confidence.
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    The Kama Sutra
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    Try getting a second-hand copy on the internet of "Get the Edge" by Tony Robbins.
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    Speaking from experience, the 2 best books that have completely changed my life from failure to someone more successful (although I still get depressed occasionally) are:

    1. Psycho-cybernetics - it's based on self image and is FANTASTIC. Offers practical advice and examples although goes on a bit.
    2. Change your life in 7 days by Paul Mckenna - very good book, offers very easy to follow excercises makes a difference although you will need to keep reading it over months.
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    How To Win Friends and Influence People. You end up addressing yourself to progress in different types of goals.
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    i was gonna say buy the game but with tsr theres always a backlash.
    what i'll say is buy the game by neil strauss, use the ideas but not copy anything as such.
    so read it a bit, then go to a club, approach some women, see where it goes.
    don't rely on the book. with each interaction with women, you'll get better and you'll evntually know how to be attractive to more women.
    obviously go gym to build up confidence in your body
    read it i say,if you're at your stage. it's not just about bedding hot women, but living an attractive life, and bringing out the best in you.
    trust me to get flamed
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    In before 'The Game' gets mentio... Oh, wait.
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    (Original post by FiveFiveSix)
    In before 'The Game' gets mentio... Oh, wait.
    beat you to it :p:
    no but it's eye opening for noobs, im not saying read it as a bible
    just use it to open your eyes, that's all
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    (Original post by 9MmBulletz)
    beat you to it :p:
    no but it's eye opening for noobs, im not saying read it as a bible
    just use it to open your eyes, that's all
    I'd agree with that. But you'd have to be some kind of a noob for it to open your eyes...

    The thought of some speccy, weedy little wannabe-PUA wandering up to the best looking girl in the place and 'negging' her just makes me giggle.
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    (Original post by FiveFiveSix)
    I'd agree with that. But you'd have to be some kind of a noob for it to open your eyes...

    The thought of some speccy, weedy little wannabe-PUA wandering up to the best looking girl in the place and 'negging' her just makes me giggle.
    LOL negging is just another way of teasing. its nothing special
    we do it all the time to our friends like we say "maybe one day you'll get to m height" to a friend shorter than you. that's a neg.
    its nothing special, its just teasing, but yeah i don't recommend copying lines, girls will pick up insincerity and also they are very intuitive, hence i say use it to open your eyes
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    (Original post by 9MmBulletz)
    LOL negging is just another way of teasing. its nothing special
    we do it all the time to our friends like we say "maybe one day you'll get to m height" to a friend shorter than you. that's a neg.
    its nothing special, its just teasing, but yeah i don't recommend copying lines, girls will pick up insincerity and also they are very intuitive, hence i say use it to open your eyes
    Oh aye, I know. I just think it paints a slightly optimistic picture, is all.
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    (Original post by FiveFiveSix)
    Oh aye, I know. I just think it paints a slightly optimistic picture, is all.
    optimistic, im not sure
    i would say people get deluded, they think it will take them a day to become a true hit with the lasses.
    but they don't know it takes time, like it does with everything else
    i think that's the core problem with most guys
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been looking into these books, but I'm a bit of a cynic. I really can't be doing with anything wishy-washy, the sort of "follow your dreams" and "tell yourself you are brilliant" CBT that most books seem to offer, which is exactly why I gave up on counselling, I just don't find it helpful, only patronising.

    As a guy I guess I'd prefer something thats a bit more to the point (most books seem to be written by women, for women).

    I've been reading reviews for Paul Mckennas "Instant Confidence". Has anyone tried this, or have any other recommendations.
    try the rules of the game by neil strauss. Its a 30 day programme designed to teach you "game" (ie. make you better at picking up women), with exercises every day. Reading it, it seems like loads of it is about building confidence and achieving your personal goals rather than only picking up.

    I'm only on the 2nd day but already its made me re-assess so yeah pretty gd! And no wish wash, it has clear definite things to do every day. Torrent it
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    (Original post by 9MmBulletz)
    i was gonna say buy the game but with tsr theres always a backlash.
    what i'll say is buy the game by neil strauss, use the ideas but not copy anything as such.
    so read it a bit, then go to a club, approach some women, see where it goes.
    don't rely on the book. with each interaction with women, you'll get better and you'll evntually know how to be attractive to more women.
    obviously go gym to build up confidence in your body
    read it i say,if you're at your stage. it's not just about bedding hot women, but living an attractive life, and bringing out the best in you.
    trust me to get flamed
    Personally I'd say that Rules of the game is much better, although the game is a fairly good background read
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    (Original post by hey guysch im kl)
    Personally I'd say that Rules of the game is much better, although the game is a fairly good background read
    hav u done any day game yet?
    how's it going
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    (Original post by 9MmBulletz)
    hav u done any day game yet?
    how's it going
    nah, admittedly I'm a complete n00b and have only got to day 2. From what I've read though it seems pretty good
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    (Original post by hey guysch im kl)
    nah, admittedly I'm a complete n00b and have only got to day 2. From what I've read though it seems pretty good
    oh not bad, at least you got a number close, how many approaches till you got a #close?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been reading reviews for Paul Mckennas "Instant Confidence". Has anyone tried this, or have any other recommendations.
    I've been using the CD for a few months now and its very good stuff. But then again hypnosis has always worked a trick on me because im quite trusting and sugestible. You don't necessarily sound like that type of person, but still, give it a go maybe.

    Who moved my cheese? has a very powerful message which is worth taking to heart. Its definately something I live by. But its not really detailed practical advice which is what you sound like youre after.

    Let me know if you find anything good.
 
 
 
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