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  • View Poll Results: Estranged or ...?
    I'm estranged from my whole family and it was my choice.
    4
    5.19%
    I'm estranged from my whole family and it was not my choice.
    2
    2.60%
    I have a great relationship with my family.
    27
    35.06%
    I'm estranged from some members of my family and it was my choice.
    8
    10.39%
    I'm estranged from some members of my family and it wasn'y my choice.
    11
    14.29%
    I have a bad relationship with my family, but wouldn't ever leave.
    11
    14.29%
    I have a bad relationship with my family, and would consider leaving them.
    14
    18.18%

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    (Original post by iliketea)
    Out of interest, how did you 'just' get estranged from your family? From what I remember that process takes a while...

    Anyway, I hardly talk to my dad anymore, maybe four times a year on msn and once or so on the phone (birthday). It's okay. You just suck it up and move on.
    I made the decision to not see them again about a year ago, and The process has taken nearly two years. But it still feels relatively recent to me.
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    (Original post by PrincessAriadne)
    You sound like what a child of mine in the future, might say:p: : my husband's family didn't want us to be together so they disowned him, and my father hates me, so i'm estranged from him.
    i've decided that some people arent worth bothering with lol, my parents have been married 23 years and the relatives' disapproval has done them no harm.
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    (Original post by PrincessAriadne)
    Are you at Uni now, and do you still live at home? Why don't you move out, if you don't mind me asking?
    I'm at Uni, but stuck at home for 3 months during summer. I have a house, but I can't really move into it until October. (The landlord is charging us half price for the months August to October since no one is supposedly living in it.)
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    (Original post by 123qwerty)
    i've decided that some people arent worth bothering with lol, my parents have been married 23 years and the relatives' disapproval has done them no harm.
    I feel the same Me and my husband have been married for 4 years, and together for 2 years before that, and his family's severe disapproval and attempts to split us up, were all wasted. Only they have lost out in the end.
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    I'm estranged from my dad, and the entire side of his family. I've not really seen any of my dad's side of the family since I moved to Wales - so that's 10 years in December - but as for my dad, it's only been 4 years, but I feel so much better.

    Though if he doesn't stop turning up at the house I'm going to start a case for a restraining order.
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    Permanently estranged by choice, myself; but you know about me, OP. I've read your most recent PM, but only on my Blackberry, and need a PC to type up the detailed reply - so I'll respond at approximately 8am tomorrow.
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    (Original post by KingJoe)
    Hi, I have just become estranged from my family, and wondered if anyone else on here is? I don't know, I guess I just want to feel that I'm not alone in having gone through this. Please feel free to comment or PM me if you'd prefer. I'm happy to talk to people about this, and would also really love to help anyone just having trouble with their family (I've had a lot of experience of family relationships deteriorating).

    I think I'll make a poll so the results are more easy to see. Juts mulling over family life, and life in general, and curious where everyone else is at the moment.
    Hate them all, only living with my mum and sister but can't wait to move to uni to get away from them all. But tbh, our family has a history of hating each other.
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    (Original post by Little Weed)
    I feel the same Me and my husband have been married for 4 years, and together for 2 years before that, and his family's severe disapproval and attempts to split us up, were all wasted. Only they have lost out in the end.
    i know. i think when it happend there were limited attempts at communication, but then both sides gave up. if people can really be that judgemental, you'll never change their minds and its a waste of time trying when you could be doing something productive
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    (Original post by psychocustard)
    I'm estranged from my dad, and the entire side of his family. I've not really seen any of my dad's side of the family since I moved to Wales - so that's 10 years in December - but as for my dad, it's only been 4 years, but I feel so much better.

    Though if he doesn't stop turning up at the house I'm going to start a case for a restraining order.
    What does he do when he turns up at the house? If you don't want him there and you've told him that, I'd just call the police immediately if I were you. (it's what I did, but admittedly in my case they were being aggressive and very threatening).
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    (Original post by KingJoe)
    What does he do when he turns up at the house? If you don't want him there and you've told him that, I'd just call the police immediately if I were you. (it's what I did, but admittedly in my case they were being aggressive and very threatening).
    Last time he turned up, he had a kitten for me. *facepalm*

    He gets aggressive when I don't want to come to the door and talk to him. When he came a few Christmases ago, he ended up turning over the bins and ripping open the bin bags.
    When I eventually did on my birthday - he turns up on my birthday, Easter, and Christmas - then I just told him exactly what I think of him for once, and he looked a bit disappointed and left.

    Next time he comes to the door - I'm thinking possibly results day - I'm calling the police straight off. Had absolutely enough of the tosser.
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    Nope.
    but i have a couple of relatives who are estranged.
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    (Original post by psychocustard)
    Last time he turned up, he had a kitten for me. *facepalm*

    He gets aggressive when I don't want to come to the door and talk to him. When he came a few Christmases ago, he ended up turning over the bins and ripping open the bin bags.
    When I eventually did on my birthday - he turns up on my birthday, Easter, and Christmas - then I just told him exactly what I think of him for once, and he looked a bit disappointed and left.

    Next time he comes to the door - I'm thinking possibly results day - I'm calling the police straight off. Had absolutely enough of the tosser.
    Cripes - sounds as bad as what i went through. We called the police every time. Defo would if i were you!
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    (Original post by KingJoe)
    Cripes - sounds as bad as what i went through. We called the police every time. Defo would if i were you!
    Well the next time he turns up, my boyfriend's likely to be here. He'll be in charge of calling them and getting them around before he starts kicking off again.

    You'd think after 4 years of telling him that he was a prick he'd take notice.
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    Ones I paid back the money I owe them, I'm moving out asap, they are ridiculous.
    You wont believe what they did last week, and they make my sister's life hell too, and they are only young.
    And they think that they are 'christians'
    bullsh.it
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    (Original post by KingJoe)
    What happened, if you don't mind saying Or you could PM me if you'd rather.
    Basically I found out the thing that eventually broke up my parents' marriage a long time before my mom did. I can't forgive him for what he did and especially as my mom begged him to apologise to me for what he'd put me through and he wouldn't. Now he lives in a flat somewhere and I live on my own as well so I don't have to be anywhere near him and I can go and visit my mom and sister in my mom's house because he's not there.
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    (Original post by michellestar)
    Ones I paid back the money I owe them, I'm moving out asap, they are ridiculous.
    You wont believe what they did last week, and they make my sister's life hell too, and they are only young.
    And they think that they are 'christians'
    bullsh.it
    i hope everything gets better for you soon
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    (Original post by psychocustard)
    Well the next time he turns up, my boyfriend's likely to be here. He'll be in charge of calling them and getting them around before he starts kicking off again.

    You'd think after 4 years of telling him that he was a prick he'd take notice.
    Some people are just plain stupid in my experience - I spent a year and a half ignoring my mum when she hammered on the door, and we even wrote her a letter informing her that i was never coming back to her, and the reasons why, and that her constant harassment was only making it more and more true, but she continued to push herself in my face, and even had the cheek to try and get me hurt and scared so I'd be forced to go back to her. Deaf or what?
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    (Original post by 123qwerty)
    i know. i think when it happend there were limited attempts at communication, but then both sides gave up. if people can really be that judgemental, you'll never change their minds and its a waste of time trying when you could be doing something productive
    Well said - if 'family' aren't enriching your life, and the relationship is no longer mutually beneficial then there's no point dragging it out.
 
 
 
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