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if you fancied someone but in a relationship? Watch

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    #1

    Please keep anon, thanks incase he reads this..

    Just say you fancied someone but you were in a long term relationship with your girlfriend/boyfriend, would you wait for them to say something about their feelings (like they fancied you) to break from your girlfriend/boyfriend, or would you just split up with your girlfriend if you have feelings for someone else and hope that they felt for you in the same way?

    Thanks very much
    • #2
    #2

    Get a mate to bang the girl then see what he says and if shes good, id leave my gf for her
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    If you no longer have feelings for your boyfriend/girlfriend, why are you in the relationship anyway?
    You don't have to be in the relationship just because it's a long-term thing. And if you're having feelings for someone else then maybe it's time to call it a day.
    Do what makes you happy
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    Split up with them. If you like someone else you obviously don't like your partner enough to stay with them. Anyone who wants to get with someone else before spliting up with their current partner is a coward and all-round terrible person.
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    If I was in a relationship and I had feelings for someone else I'd have to know weather it was love/lust. No point stringing along your current partner if your heart isn't in it but if it was a "yeah she's nice" feeling then I'd try and shake it off.
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    yeah... i wouldnt be with my boyfriend if i was waiting around for someone else... its just not fair, even if you do have feelings for him still. if it was a silly few day crush that would never be considered to be acted on thats a different story but you clearly dont think that as you asked if you should wait for someone to make the move. Let your bf go for his sake or at least re-evaluate why your with him and see if your feelings swing back in the right direction
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    Eurgh.. tough situation to be in.
    What you need to think about:

    1) how likely it is that this person likes you back/if you have a chance with them

    2) If they do like you, if being with them is really worth giving up that long-term relationship. For example if you do break it off and go after this person you like, if it doesn't work out, or only works out for a few weeks, it's gonna feel like **** afterwards. Trust me.

    3) However if you don't feel as strongly for your girlfriend/boyfriend as you once did, maybe you don't love them anymore or something, then obviously you might be thinking about breaking it off with them anyways.

    Yeah sorry I realise that none of that is seriously helpful, just trying to help my giving my opinion on these things.
    To truthfully answer your question, in hindsight (sigh) I would not break up with my boyfriend, whom I loved, for a guy I 'liked'. Nor would I allow myself to get tempted before I had the chance to break it off... don't ask...

    Sorry for not being very helpful!
    I hope you work it out somehow =)
    xxxx
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    just because you're in one doesn't mean you can't be attracted to someone else - you're still human; you have to decide how much you value your current relationship and then act accordingly
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    'The moment I got myself into a relationship is the moment I stopped acknowledging the existance of other girls' - Nelson
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Please keep anon, thanks incase he reads this..

    Just say you fancied someone but you were in a long term relationship with your girlfriend/boyfriend, would you wait for them to say something about their feelings (like they fancied you) to break from your girlfriend/boyfriend, or would you just split up with your girlfriend if you have feelings for someone else and hope that they felt for you in the same way?

    Thanks very much
    You clearly don't value your current relationship an awful lot.
    x
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    I know it sounds terrible but i think for me to be having thoughts like that i would think it is the end of the relationship, if i was thinking about trying to get with other people etc. I would get out and try and save the feelings of myself and the other half, before thinks got even deeper and more complicated.
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    (Original post by Svenjamin)
    Split up with them. If you like someone else you obviously don't like your partner enough to stay with them. Anyone who wants to get with someone else before spliting up with their current partner is a coward and all-round terrible person.
    Not sure this argument holds up.

    I still think you can fancy other people but still love your partner. I don't think it makes you completely blind, it would be rather dangerous if it did.

    The concept of trust means if you act on it you're a total **** basically. So if you decide that you don't love your partner anymore then that's something else, but if you do then control your lust. It's not THAT hard.
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    (Original post by cats_have_teats)
    Not sure this argument holds up.

    I still think you can fancy other people but still love your partner. I don't think it makes you completely blind, it would be rather dangerous if it did.
    Personally, I think there's a HUGE difference between finding someone else attractive whilst in a relationship and seriously thinking "I'm going to make a move on someone else". Once it reaches the latter the person involved obviously doesn't want to be with their current partner anymore.

    The mental jump of discarding their partner has been made. It's not so much cheating on the current partner, more like stringing the partner along until the person finds someone else.
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    (Original post by duracell)
    I would not break up with my boyfriend, whom I loved, for a guy I 'liked'. Nor would I allow myself to get tempted before I had the chance to break it off
    I highly agree with this. OP get your priorities clear cut!
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    I had a very similar dilemma just now! I broke up with my boyfriend, my heart wasn't in it anymore. I had made a consious decision to stay with him, then next time I saw him I ended up in tears after yet another argument knowing that I'd made the wrong choice. The person I fancied reciprocated and we've started going out.

    Yeah, I've been called a *****, a ****, and been accused of doing a horrible thing and being underhanded.
    Really though I've done things the right way, I broke up with my boyfriend, then once you're single you don't need to feel any obligations you can be with someone else should you choose. Better break up with him than cheat/string along.

    And don't be afraid of being alone. There will always be someone there, promise.
 
 
 
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