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Why is "It's not you, it's me" SO insulting? watch

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    I mean, I understand why if someone only gave this as their reason of breaking up with you you'd be a bit insulted that they hadn't even really given a reason. Or if you'd been going out with the person for a lengthy amount of time, fair enough it doesn't seem like a great explanation.
    But when the person doing the breaking up says anything along the lines of "I don't want you to think it's anything you did, it's just I don't want to be in a relationship" why is that taken as such a "omg did you just say it's not you it's me?!"
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    Because they're not being straight. When it's seen as its a "It's not you, it's me" it's blatently you. Sparing feelings with that line is a fail xD
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    Because its a cliche, so they haven't put much thought into it.
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    because no matter who hears it, they'll all be thinking the same 'you can't be bothered to even make a decent excuse up'
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    It's cliche and an easy way out. It's like saying "I couldn't be bothered putting thought into it, so I'm going with a generic saying"
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    But if it's used within a bunch of other reasons.. And sometimes it's not a lie, it might genuinely not be anything about you :dontknow:
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    I was told that this morning.... but at the end of a very long conversation, so it wasn't a cop out.
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    (Original post by RightSaidJames)
    I was told that this morning.... but at the end of a very long conversation, so it wasn't a cop out.
    :console: You'll find someone else :awesome:
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    I think its just because its a rubbish excuse. Of course it is partly the other person. If they were that fantastic and worth it then you wouldn't be dumping them. People just want reasons I suppose.
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    Its a go at saving someones feelings, but in actual fact it probably does the reverse in most cases as the person dosent get a straight answer as to what the reason was, well the seem to think that, there seems to be an idea if someone says "its not you its me" there is a hidden adgenda as to why they broke up, when in fact it may be exactly what was said.
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    (Original post by Lefty Leo)
    :console: You'll find someone else :awesome:
    Thanks. Although I've not lost her yet, she's not my girlfriend at the moment, but there's still hope.
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    (Original post by RightSaidJames)
    Thanks. Although I've not lost her yet, she's not my girlfriend at the moment, but there's still hope.
    :awesome: Totally.
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    I prefer "look, it's not me, it's you. You're terrible. Go away."
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    My ex said this to me 3 weeks ago.I love her and miss her.I wish there was something i could do
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    "It's not me, it's you"

    :ahee:
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    It makes you feel useless, unable to do anything to change the situation, or she isn't even giving you the chance to give the relationship another try.
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    Its insulting because its a lie basically
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    Because using that saying means that the person concerned (not you, the one saying it), is a complete ****.
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    Because it's used so often that it's nowadays just seen as a cop-out rather than a real reason.
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    Have you ever seen friends? Theres a bit in that and they basically 'translate' cliches and . .

    'its not you, it's me', - it IS you
 
 
 
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