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Marriage - yay or nay? Watch

  • View Poll Results: DO YOU BELIEVE IN MARRIAGE?
    no
    23
    31.51%
    yes
    50
    68.49%

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    I fully intend to be married, it's far more definite than just a living-together situation in my opinion; sure, living together shows commitment, but it's a commitment which can be broken easily. Vowing yourself to the other in marriage is both romantic, and setting the seal on your monogamous and lifelong dedication to one another. Certainly, divorce rates are on the up, but a marriage is still more difficult and messier to end than a simple partnership.

    I think that wedding days are beautiful, and are a memorable and enjoyable moment in two people's lives which affirm their coming together. I intend to get married at around 30, so it's not too young, but I won't be too old to feel like the beautiful bride

    Those who say marriage is outdated are putting cynicism over emotion far too strongly, which I dislike.
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    (Original post by shorty.loves.angels)
    I absolutely agree. Problems aren't there to trip you up they're to make you put in the effort and work for success :p:

    Happiness doesn't come for free!
    yup but you have to remember that you cant make the other person do what you want .. if you have a problem you should meet in the middle and then maybe in the near future if you still have a problem then to talk to your partner and try to sort things out
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    Yes, I do believe in it... not so much the christian side of things, to be honest I probably wouldn't get married in a church as I don't particularly believe in God... but the whole, devoting your life to one person, and knowing that them commiting to you means they want to be with you forever. I know people divorce and things go wrong, but if I was to get married I'd want it to be with the person I want to spend my life with. My parents have been married for 40 years and even though they fight and act like they hate eachother sometimes, I know they love eachother with all their hearts and I'd love to be the little old couple who've been married for hundreds of years haha, it's just nice
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    (Original post by GazzyG)
    I believe in marriage.

    But it requires both parties to work at it.

    And to work at it through the hard times and the good.

    Every marriage starts off with good intentions, feeling that it's going to last forever. It's after the years start to pass and you go through bad times that the marriage is tested. If one person crumbles, then the whole thing falls apart.

    To cut it short - yes, I believe in marriage as an institution. I just, sometimes, don't believe in people anymore.
    Agree with everything you said

    I don't believe that True Love is a smooth, easy ride. It doesn't mean that because it's real love, everything would fall into place. Nothing does. It just means that two people care enough about each other and their relationship to keep wanting and trying to make it work, through the hard times and even times when they find their feelings faltering. It is something that goes beyond simply being in love, which is something I believe a marriage can cement.

    Someone posted this quote a while back which I think summarises love very well:

    "Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your root was so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. that is just being in love, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two."

    - 'Captain Corelli's Mandolin' by Louis de Bernieres
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    I don't really see the point and don't really intend on getting married. I'm not religious and I don't need a ring and some paper to commit myself to someone. If I'm going to be with them "forever" then I will, no need to have a big expensive party. I don't see any problem in other people getting married if they want to though, I just don't get the big fuss I suppose :dontknow:
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    (Original post by Tsukuyomi)
    i mean love in general, either loving your gf or loving your family, i dont believe in any form of love
    What do you think you 'feel' then, when you feel what I would call 'love' for family/partners.?
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    (Original post by Little Weed)
    What do you think you 'feel' then, when you feel what I would call 'love' for family/partners.?
    emtions limit your capabilities, also i try not to get attached to people
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    (Original post by falls_whisper)
    Agree with everything you said

    I don't believe that True Love is a smooth, easy ride. It doesn't mean that because it's real love, everything would fall into place. Nothing does. It just means that two people care enough about each other and their relationship to keep wanting and trying to make it work, through the hard times and even times when they find their feelings faltering. It is something that goes beyond simply being in love, which is something I believe a marriage can cement.

    Someone posted this quote a while back which I think summarises love very well:

    "Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your root was so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. that is just being in love, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two."

    - 'Captain Corelli's Mandolin' by Louis de Bernieres
    Ahh, that made me cry! :rolleyes: What a perfect description.
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    I don't see why I would need what is mainly just some stupid piece of paper saying we are a couple and in the end means nothing. I don't need some damn paper telling me I'm together. And if it ever didn't work out it dosen't allow you to leave the relationship and cut all ties because of the other half getting half of your stuff.
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    I strongly believe in marriage. It is what keeps a bond between a couple.
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    (Original post by hannahlou27)
    Yes, I do believe in it... not so much the christian side of things, to be honest I probably wouldn't get married in a church as I don't particularly believe in God... but the whole, devoting your life to one person, and knowing that them commiting to you means they want to be with you forever. I know people divorce and things go wrong, but if I was to get married I'd want it to be with the person I want to spend my life with. My parents have been married for 40 years and even though they fight and act like they hate eachother sometimes, I know they love eachother with all their hearts and I'd love to be the little old couple who've been married for hundreds of years haha, it's just nice

    Aww that's so sweet! I wish I had role models like you parents and it sounds like you're really gaining from their experience :o: My mum and dad have both been divorced twice (second time was each other), and now my mum has married for a third time and my dad has decided he hates people and pretty much shuts himself away with alcohol. I haven't seen him for years!

    For a little while this really put me off marriage because it made me feel like it must be a waste of time, but since I met my current boyfriend that completely changed. He really wants to get married when he's ready and thinks it's a wonderful idea once two people have decided to commit And it's rubbed off on me and now I almost can't wait lol :o: I would never do it unless I felt absolutely sure about it though, IMP people should have been together, possibly lived together, for a good few years to make sure that they really are right for each other.
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    (Original post by Jelephant)
    I don't really see the point and don't really intend on getting married. I'm not religious and I don't need a ring and some paper to commit myself to someone. If I'm going to be with them "forever" then I will, no need to have a big expensive party. I don't see any problem in other people getting married if they want to though, I just don't get the big fuss I suppose :dontknow:
    Just out of interest (not challenging you or anything :p: ) - do you think anything could ever change your mind? Anything at all...

    Just ask because I once felt the same as you but something changed my mind!
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    (Original post by shorty.loves.angels)
    Just out of interest (not challenging you or anything :p: ) - do you think anything could ever change your mind? Anything at all...

    Just ask because I once felt the same as you but something changed my mind!
    :dontknow: I just think it's all pointless, but obviously there could be something that may result in me being married at some point. It's not like I'm against it, I just don't see any real reason to. If at some point down the line there was someone I really liked, but they had their heart set on marriage then fair enough, I'd probably just do it to make them happy

    When my parents married they literally just got up one day, threw on their Sunday best and headed to the registrar. If I was to ever get married it'd likely be something similar. I've never imagined having a big wedding with a big fancy cake and a huge church and an expensive dress etc etc. I'd much rather spend that sort of crazy money on a house than on one day that ultimately means little to me
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    YAY Marriage - Not young though,
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    (Original post by PrincessAriadne)
    Following on from the popular 'getting married young' thread.

    Do you 'believe' in marriage? (regardless of other factors eg age/feelings etc). Do you think it's a worthy and good institution or pointless and no longer valid in modern society?

    Poll and post your reasons
    I know how impractical marriage might seem, but I really like the idea, and want it to work.

    I'm a romantic, and I cannot think of anything sweeter than vowing that you will love that person through everything, and the security of being loved in return...:o:
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    (Original post by Jelephant)
    :dontknow: I just think it's all pointless, but obviously there could be something that may result in me being married at some point. It's not like I'm against it, I just don't see any real reason to. If at some point down the line there was someone I really liked, but they had their heart set on marriage then fair enough, I'd probably just do it to make them happy

    When my parents married they literally just got up one day, threw on their Sunday best and headed to the registrar. If I was to ever get married it'd likely be something similar. I've never imagined having a big wedding with a big fancy cake and a huge church and an expensive dress etc etc. I'd much rather spend that sort of crazy money on a house than on one day that ultimately means little to me
    I used to think so similarly to you. I really don't know what it was that changed my mind. Perhaps finishing with my 'I'm so against anything that involves committment' boyfriend :rolleyes: helped. Hmm, I think I kind of got excited about it when my current boyfriend made it sound like the perfect way for a serious couple to celebrate/officialise their relationship.

    I definitely agree that it would be a waste of money if you weren't really that interested in it though :yep:
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    I believe in marriage, we don't NEED a piece of paper to show we love each other or anything, but I like the idea of us being each other's next of kin, having the same surname, our kids (hopefully) having the same surname, and being a family unit. We're having a very very small inexpensive wedding though; I'm not interested in having a big wedding. Not our style!
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    Neigh. The horse has spoken.
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    (Original post by falls_whisper)
    Agree with everything you said

    I don't believe that True Love is a smooth, easy ride. It doesn't mean that because it's real love, everything would fall into place. Nothing does. It just means that two people care enough about each other and their relationship to keep wanting and trying to make it work, through the hard times and even times when they find their feelings faltering. It is something that goes beyond simply being in love, which is something I believe a marriage can cement.

    Someone posted this quote a while back which I think summarises love very well:

    "Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your root was so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. that is just being in love, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two."

    - 'Captain Corelli's Mandolin' by Louis de Bernieres
    Wonderful! What a sensational post.

    PS - Wanna get married? :p:
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    I BELIEVE in marriage, it exists!
    I selected no however because I think the concept of marriage has ballooned and it is almost expected that you will wed one day...! If it wasn't for this social expectation, how steeply would marriage rates fall!
    I hope to get married ONE day, it would take time though and if it doesn't happen I definately wouldn't "settle"
    Also how many married couples WOULD have split had they not been married, it's like it's just a social construct encouraging you to stay together, perhaps this is a good thing though!!!
 
 
 
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