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    (Original post by blondyx)
    I don't agree entirely with this thread. I know couples who are completely sure of the others love for them and they are happy together and have been for a long time. When people show me love i like it more than when they act distant.
    When you are sure of someones love, you being to trust them more and get close to them rather than the passion fading away. Just think about people who get married. IMO anyways
    True love like that is very rare though.

    If anyone cares to read it there is a fascinating discussion of love in a book called the road less travelled. in fact, the whole book is, i think, such an engrossing read.

    in a nutshell, the author distinguishes between passionate love that lasts about 6 months, and true love, which is when couples are really put to the test. by this time, they are used to each other, and their ego boundaries snap into place. thus they realise they have a self, and have to cater to and think about their own needs as well as their partners. love then requires a lot more effort, as you try and balance your own needs and your partners.

    im pretty sure thats a *******ised description of what peck says but i agree with it anyway.
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    (Original post by Preeka)
    I came across this concept on wikipedia and found it quite fascinating.


    "It's the Catch-22 of romantic relationships: The more deeply one partner falls in love, the more distant the other becomes. This is the passion trap, an emotional dynamic that results in increasing desire and desperation in the 'one down' lover, and dissatisfaction, often mingled with guilt and withdrawal, in the 'one up' ... one partner is more in love – or emotionally invested in the relationship – than the other. The more love the loving partner wants from the other, the less the other feels like giving.
    ".


    Just interested to see what people think.
    I don't think you can generalise this to everyone. There are some who will put up with being treated like **** by their partners because they 'love them' and some who treat their partners like **** cos they can get away with it. But I think (or hope) most people love their partners for who they are and appreciate them.
 
 
 
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