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    #1

    Here's the situation:

    I'm 19, and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We're in a long-distance relationship so we can't have sex all the time, but usually when we see each other. In the first year, I looked forward to sex, even though it hurt quite a lot. When I started Uni, we saw each other really often (I lived near him, plus my parents couldn't interfere and stop me from seeing him, as usual) It was exciting for both of us, because we could see each other more, and as a typical guy, he got more sex. It hurt a little as usual, but it started to get better (from about October onwards).

    But since about February, it's been really painful, and I don't look forward to sex at all. I'm fed up of knowing it's going to hurt, so my boyfriend and I barely have sex nowadays. In fact, I hardly look forward to any sexual contact, and find it difficult to get turned on at all. I just prefer to cuddle and kiss nowadays. My boyfriend is still very attractive to me. but it's the fear of the pain which frustrates me. He's very understanding, and we still do oral, but I wish I could enjoy sex.

    I don't know what could be causing the problem. Any help is greatly appreciated.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Here's the situation:

    I'm 19, and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We're in a long-distance relationship so we can't have sex all the time, but usually when we see each other. In the first year, I looked forward to sex, even though it hurt quite a lot. When I started Uni, we saw each other really often (I lived near him, plus my parents couldn't interfere and stop me from seeing him, as usual) It was exciting for both of us, because we could see each other more, and as a typical guy, he got more sex. It hurt a little as usual, but it started to get better (from about October onwards).

    But since about February, it's been really painful, and I don't look forward to sex at all. I'm fed up of knowing it's going to hurt, so my boyfriend and I barely have sex nowadays. In fact, I hardly look forward to any sexual contact, and find it difficult to get turned on at all. I just prefer to cuddle and kiss nowadays. My boyfriend is still very attractive to me. but it's the fear of the pain which frustrates me. He's very understanding, and we still do oral, but I wish I could enjoy sex.

    I don't know what could be causing the problem. Any help is greatly appreciated.
    There are many things that can cause pain during sex, including sexually transmitted diseases or a rarer problem called erosion. I would see your GP as soon as possible.
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    Could tell him about it. Maybe he can help unless he already knows?
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    (Original post by Cloud Shine)
    There are many things that can cause pain during sex, including sexually transmitted diseases or a rarer problem called erosion. I would see your GP as soon as possible.
    This.

    It's probably something simple that can be treated, but the longer you leave it, the worse it's going to get.
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    lube?
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    (Original post by Cloud Shine)
    There are many things that can cause pain during sex, including sexually transmitted diseases or a rarer problem called erosion. I would see your GP as soon as possible.
    freak her out.


    but you are right. go see your GP. cant hurt. in the meantime try lube?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Here's the situation:

    I'm 19, and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We're in a long-distance relationship so we can't have sex all the time, but usually when we see each other. In the first year, I looked forward to sex, even though it hurt quite a lot. When I started Uni, we saw each other really often (I lived near him, plus my parents couldn't interfere and stop me from seeing him, as usual) It was exciting for both of us, because we could see each other more, and as a typical guy, he got more sex. It hurt a little as usual, but it started to get better (from about October onwards).

    But since about February, it's been really painful, and I don't look forward to sex at all. I'm fed up of knowing it's going to hurt, so my boyfriend and I barely have sex nowadays. In fact, I hardly look forward to any sexual contact, and find it difficult to get turned on at all. I just prefer to cuddle and kiss nowadays. My boyfriend is still very attractive to me. but it's the fear of the pain which frustrates me. He's very understanding, and we still do oral, but I wish I could enjoy sex.

    I don't know what could be causing the problem. Any help is greatly appreciated.
    Is this not just a lack of foreplay issue?
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    (Original post by danny111)
    freak her out.


    but you are right. go see your GP. cant hurt. in the meantime try lube?
    why would what I wrote freak her out?
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    (Original post by Greghouse)
    Is this not just a lack of foreplay issue?
    Not likely to be, I think she probably knows the basic mechanics...loads of things can make sex hurt for a variety of reasons.
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    (Original post by Cloud Shine)
    There are many things that can cause pain during sex, including sexually transmitted diseases or a rarer problem called erosion. I would see your GP as soon as possible.
    I highly doubt I have an STD. Like I said, it was fine from about October to February (in the 2nd year), and then it started to hurt a lot again. Plus my boyfriend and I have only had sex with each other.

    I do use lube, lots of it in fact, but it doesn't doesn't help. It's not the matter of friction, it's just a really sharp pain.
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    (Original post by Cloud Shine)
    Not likely to be, I think she probably knows the basic mechanics...loads of things can make sex hurt for a variety of reasons.
    We don't know her sexual history and just knowing the basic mechanics doesn't mean you're doing it right ...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I highly doubt I have an STD. Like I said, it was fine from about October to February (in the 2nd year), and then it started to hurt a lot again. Plus my boyfriend and I have only had sex with each other.

    I do use lube, lots of it in fact, but it doesn't doesn't help. It's not the matter of friction, it's just a really sharp pain.
    See your GP. It does sound quite a bit like erosion, but in any case it's definitely not a normal pain. They'll make you have an STD test anyway - they always do :yes: but it's likely to be something they can help you with. Might also have something to do with the condom??
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    Is he going to deep? Or maybe it's just the position..try different stuff. My girlfriend found doggy really painful for some reason, but missionary was fine o.O
    • #1
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    (Original post by Cloud Shine)
    See your GP. It does sound quite a bit like erosion, but in any case it's definitely not a normal pain. They'll make you have an STD test anyway - they always do :yes: but it's likely to be something they can help you with. Might also have something to do with the condom??
    Oh we don't use condoms, I'm on the pill.

    I think I will see a doctor. At first I thought it's just because we don't do it very often, but after going to University, and after 2 years I think I must have a problem.

    Thank you for the advice guys.
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    (Original post by J-E-N-O-V-A)
    Is he going to deep? Or maybe it's just the position..try different stuff. My girlfriend found doggy really painful for some reason, but missionary was fine o.O
    Ah no, it's not that. It hurts as he's going in. He does touch my cervix, but that's not what causes the pain. It's just a really sharp pain on the inside walls every time he goes in.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ah no, it's not that. It hurts as he's going in. He does touch my cervix, but that's not what causes the pain. It's just a really sharp pain on the inside walls every time he goes in.
    Thrush? The Doc will know. You should probably just go see him, that's the best advice you'll get here.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Ah no, it's not that. It hurts as he's going in. He does touch my cervix, but that's not what causes the pain. It's just a really sharp pain on the inside walls every time he goes in.
    A pain as if you're too tight for him?
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    (Original post by l_weeza)
    A pain as if you're too tight for him?
    No no, though initially the entrance hurts when he enters, it's mainly the inside walls that hurt.

    Sorry for being vague, I know it's not like anyone can diagnose me. I was just wondering if it was normal after 2 years. Apparently it's not, so off to the doctor's I shall go!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Here's the situation:

    I'm 19, and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We're in a long-distance relationship so we can't have sex all the time, but usually when we see each other. In the first year, I looked forward to sex, even though it hurt quite a lot. When I started Uni, we saw each other really often (I lived near him, plus my parents couldn't interfere and stop me from seeing him, as usual) It was exciting for both of us, because we could see each other more, and as a typical guy, he got more sex. It hurt a little as usual, but it started to get better (from about October onwards).

    But since about February, it's been really painful, and I don't look forward to sex at all. I'm fed up of knowing it's going to hurt, so my boyfriend and I barely have sex nowadays. In fact, I hardly look forward to any sexual contact, and find it difficult to get turned on at all. I just prefer to cuddle and kiss nowadays. My boyfriend is still very attractive to me. but it's the fear of the pain which frustrates me. He's very understanding, and we still do oral, but I wish I could enjoy sex.

    I don't know what could be causing the problem. Any help is greatly appreciated.
    It may well just be needing to get used to it. Also now your head is anticipating pain it makes it even harder for your body to get used ot it and enjoy it.Have you had a vaginal orgasm? Do you masturbate? Both of these would definitely help you earn more about your body and help you enjoy sex, so i'de really recommend you do this.

    Iit could of course be an infection but I doubt this, like you say its been this for two years and you enjoy oral and stuff.You could check with your gp to beon the safe side.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    No no, though initially the entrance hurts when he enters, it's mainly the inside walls that hurt.

    Sorry for being vague, I know it's not like anyone can diagnose me. I was just wondering if it was normal after 2 years. Apparently it's not, so off to the doctor's I shall go!
    Iit's the inside walls it could just be the friction?do they clench a little, or try andresist it? If so then it is just needing to get usedto sexandbeingmore turned on. If you are totally relaxed, lubed up but the walls are stingingat any kind of touch then yes go see a gp. Do you use tampons?Maybe try slowly inserting a finger andchecking it out that way?
 
 
 
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