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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon or delete please.

    I've posted here before about problems, but once again, I have no one to turn to.

    I don't know if I can cope anymore. I feel as if I've failed utterly in everything. I've suffered from depression, anxiety and anger problems for years now, and I'm awaiting therapy, but that won't be for months.

    All my life seems to be wasted opportunities, one after another to the point where I don't even see opportunities anymore, I can't even consider the possibility of something good happening to me. I went to a prestigious school, I was expected to go to Oxford or Cambridge. My parents split up, and I lost any focus I may have had. I stopped caring completely.

    I had one long relationship and a string of meaningless encounters with girls. After destroying me utterly, the only girl I ever loved went on to be happy and successful: she's got her dream job, house, car, boyfriend, all that stuff. Holidays, probably a baby on the way.

    By contrast I've got an average degree from an average uni, I've never had a job, I can't get a job, I don't even want a job. I have no hopes or ambitions other than creative things which I can't commit to because I can't focus on anything and have no self-discipline. I live at home now and spend all day, every day online. I play computer games that anger me to the point of smashing my room up, hitting myself in the head, breaking objects and shouting so hard my head feels tight and hot and I feel like I'm going to die.

    I have no romantic life at all. I've completely lost what little confidence I ever had in myself and I am convinced I now repel girls completely. Despite attempting to distract myself with mind-rotting games I think about girls, think about the way that I'll never be with anyone I find attractive, and that I'll never experience the sort of happiness that other people seem to.

    Anxiety rules my life when I venture from my room. I convince myself I have illnesses I don't have, although I do seem to have a lot of physical problems - coughs that won't go, constant indigestion. When I play sports, rarely, I struggle incredibly, reaching the point of collapse after fifteen minutes of running after a ball. Pathetic. I'm skinny which makes it worse, as people assume I'm naturally athletic.

    I don't know what's going to happen next. I've already wasted eight years of my life playing online games and sitting in my room, with a break for university. Part of me thinks that I fear the mundane, and feel completely different to other people. Or perhaps I just am unable to change, locked in this prison of a non-life forever.

    Thanks to anyone who bothered to read that.
    It sucks when a girl you loved screws you over completely. Just know that you're still young and things CAN and WILL change. Buddha said nothing is permanent - he could not have been more true. The difference a few days, weeks, months can make to your life as astounding. I barely recognise the person I was 6 months ago.

    First: get some exercise and routine. Start by getting up at 9 - 10am and just going for a walk. Go for another around dusk, it's a really peaceful time of day and just walking for an hour or so is great. It will help you sleep better and your body naturally releases endorphins (feel good chemicals) which really boost your mood.

    Second: get a job. Even just part time work in a shop, get some money and learn to drive. The freedom of driving opens doors and gives you something to focus on. A friend of mine is a real boy racer type, in that he spends most of his time and money on his car. He really enjoys it.

    Third: talk to something in real life.

    Peace.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Anon or delete please.

    I've posted here before about problems, but once again, I have no one to turn to.

    I don't know if I can cope anymore. I feel as if I've failed utterly in everything. I've suffered from depression, anxiety and anger problems for years now, and I'm awaiting therapy, but that won't be for months.

    All my life seems to be wasted opportunities, one after another to the point where I don't even see opportunities anymore, I can't even consider the possibility of something good happening to me. I went to a prestigious school, I was expected to go to Oxford or Cambridge. My parents split up, and I lost any focus I may have had. I stopped caring completely.

    I had one long relationship and a string of meaningless encounters with girls. After destroying me utterly, the only girl I ever loved went on to be happy and successful: she's got her dream job, house, car, boyfriend, all that stuff. Holidays, probably a baby on the way.

    By contrast I've got an average degree from an average uni, I've never had a job, I can't get a job, I don't even want a job. I have no hopes or ambitions other than creative things which I can't commit to because I can't focus on anything and have no self-discipline. I live at home now and spend all day, every day online. I play computer games that anger me to the point of smashing my room up, hitting myself in the head, breaking objects and shouting so hard my head feels tight and hot and I feel like I'm going to die.

    I have no romantic life at all. I've completely lost what little confidence I ever had in myself and I am convinced I now repel girls completely. Despite attempting to distract myself with mind-rotting games I think about girls, think about the way that I'll never be with anyone I find attractive, and that I'll never experience the sort of happiness that other people seem to.

    Anxiety rules my life when I venture from my room. I convince myself I have illnesses I don't have, although I do seem to have a lot of physical problems - coughs that won't go, constant indigestion. When I play sports, rarely, I struggle incredibly, reaching the point of collapse after fifteen minutes of running after a ball. Pathetic. I'm skinny which makes it worse, as people assume I'm naturally athletic.

    I don't know what's going to happen next. I've already wasted eight years of my life playing online games and sitting in my room, with a break for university. Part of me thinks that I fear the mundane, and feel completely different to other people. Or perhaps I just am unable to change, locked in this prison of a non-life forever.

    Thanks to anyone who bothered to read that.
    You sound like you're own worst enemy. So your ex has moved on, parents split up and you didn't go to Oxford/Cambridge. Worse things have happened and will happen.

    Stop comparing your life with your ex's. Its very easy to think everyone is having a brilliant time, but everyone has **** to deal with. Its not that you can't get a job. How can you get a job if you spend all your time playing video games? You need to start looking. You're living at home so don't have any costs and should be able to save up easily.

    And the whole anxiety thing? You just need to get busy. Go out, exercise, socialise do some volunteering. You just have too much time on your hands.

    Wallowing in self-pity can be fun sometimes but only you can help yourself.
 
 
 
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