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Pregnancy and the parents watch

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    do what to want to do..you need to sit down with your parents and TELL them what you're doing..don't ask them..whatever you do don't be forced into having an abortion..
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I shall be slated for this, however I shall put forward my lines of reasoning for that in which you have found yourself in this predicament.

    Firstly, from the parents point of view, you as a daughter owe your parents money for which your parents supported you in your education, clothes, food etc.
    When a daughter becomes pregnant at that age, it is embarassing to the parents to answer every other family member of who the father is and what he does etc and how it will all work out. Granted I dont know your circumstances, but there is no real reason why you should be having a child at the age except that you want to live on taxpayer's money and get a free flat maybe to move into with your bf - very selfish of you might I add.

    Your point of view - I dont see any, you're not married to the guy, he can leave you anytime he wants making you another statistic of being a single parent mother.

    Consider the situation at the moment, it is difficult to find a job, living expenses are record high and you have never worked in your life meaning your yet naive and havent even started living life.
    Who will actually pay for the living costs of the baby? Do not say your bf because that isn't going to happen and your parents should not have to since you owe them money anyway and I'm certainly not going to pay you through benefits.

    Maybe consider giving your child away for adoption if you carry on with the pregnancy.
    What a shame you decided to slate the OP anonymously. The tone of your post implies that any parent over the age of 30 never encounter problems and financial hardship.

    The OP sounds committed to raising a child and supporting the baby through her and her partners own means. Not every young parent relies on the government for free handouts and there are plenty of parents over the age of 30 who do rely on the government.

    Nothing in this world worth doing is easy, you have to work hard and make difficult choices. This helps you appreciate what you have and value other people.

    To the OP I am so sorry your parents are not being supportive, thankfully your partner is and you sound like a sensible individual.
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    Not sensible enough to use contraception properly though...just saying.
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    (Original post by Trigger)
    Not sensible enough to use contraception properly though...just saying.
    The only way to remain free from pregnancy is to totally abstain from sexual intercourse. Every single method of contraception is below 100%, each method slighty varies. Studies have shown even if contraception is used correctly a very small percentage will fall pregnant.

    This can happen to anyone, at least the OP is determined to raise her baby and accept the consquences of her actions.
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    (Original post by PrincessJasmine)
    The only way to remain free from pregnancy is to totally abstain from sexual intercourse. Every single method of contraception is below 100%, each method slighty varies. Studies have shown even if contraception is used correctly a very small percentage will fall pregnant.

    This can happen to anyone, at least the OP is determined to raise her baby and accept the consquences of her actions.
    so youd condemn her if she aborted it?
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    (Original post by Trigger)
    so youd condemn her if she aborted it?
    Of course not, believe it or not I am actually pro choice as long as it is what the mother wants and is not being forced into the decision.

    Her posts indicate she is taking an adult and mature approach to her pregnancy. She has fully accepted the cost and responsibility involved and is considering the feelings of her parents.
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    (Original post by PrincessJasmine)
    Of course not, believe it or not I am actually pro choice as long as it is what the mother wants and is not being forced into the decision.

    Her posts indicate she is taking an adult and mature approach to her pregnancy. She has fully accepted the cost and responsibility involved and is considering the feelings of her parents.
    Fair enough
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    Don't fool yourself into thinking having a baby is no big deal. They take up so much time, you end up being tired constantly and it really ages you. It might feel like it puts your whole life to a halt. You wouldn't be able to go out as much as you want to - in fact hardly at all.

    The thing is, if you are going to abort it, you had best do it as soon as possible. Booking appointments at the moment is a nightmare, it's very stressful, you have to give a valid reason, and unpleasant depending on how soon you do it.

    I'm not trying to put you off. Do what you want. It's just when the time comes, you have to be prepared for everything that comes with it.

    So if you are - better look forward to it! It's not all that bad, having a baby isn't all that down. It does stop period pains - according to my mum anyway. And they are nice to cuddle. I just personally wasn't planning to have one until I was 30. What is it's name going to be do you think? Are you going for an ultrasound any time soon?

    Finally, good luck with your decision!
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    Princess Jasmine - I completely agree with you. Some idiots really seem to think that if you're over 30, educated and married it seems to automatically make you a good parent. And the whole you owe your parents money for bringing you up - what on earth is that about?! When my son becomes an adult, I would never expect him to repay me for every single penny I've spent on him, thats just ridiculous!!

    The OP I would just like to let you know that everyone is not as pigheaded as the people here are I promise you!! I have not in the whole 15 months that I have had my son ever encountered such negativity surrounding young mothers which is really why I am quite shocked! Dont let these morons put you off having your baby, you have already said you would like to continue with the pregnancy, you know what you want so good luck x x
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    becoming a mother has its hardships
    but its rewards are massive
    unconditional love from a child and nurturing it to become an adult is the most important job ever,

    all i wanna say is good luck, and next time be careful, you dont want your child to be an accident but a blessing

    Kudos love
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    (Original post by mattydedon)
    becoming a mother has its hardships
    but its rewards are massive
    unconditional love from a child and nurturing it to become an adult is the most important job ever,

    all i wanna say is good luck, and next time be careful, you dont want your child to be an accident but a blessing

    Kudos love
    I dunno i do data entry and if i dont enter that data who knows what might happen :zomg:

    I was 21 when I had my baby and I support your freedom to choose what is best but do think of the practicalities. Having a baby is no easy ride- a lot of sleepless nights and stress. If you are not ready to give up your social life then dont go there. I have been with my partner for 5 years with our own house so arrangements like that were no problem, but you have got to think about your options and how this baby is to be supported because babies require a lot of money and money doesn't grow on trees. Tell your Parents what you want and show them that practically you have thought this through, find out about tax credits, benefits and housing if need be. I dont want to put you off but having a baby totally changes your life as you know it.

    (Original post by Laura_Cardiff)
    Princess Jasmine - I completely agree with you. Some idiots really seem to think that if you're over 30, educated and married it seems to automatically make you a good parent. And the whole you owe your parents money for bringing you up - what on earth is that about?! When my son becomes an adult, I would never expect him to repay me for every single penny I've spent on him, thats just ridiculous!!

    The OP I would just like to let you know that everyone is not as pigheaded as the people here are I promise you!! I have not in the whole 15 months that I have had my son ever encountered such negativity surrounding young mothers which is really why I am quite shocked! Dont let these morons put you off having your baby, you have already said you would like to continue with the pregnancy, you know what you want so good luck x x
    I completely agree.
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    A thought just occured to me.

    Lets say you have this child. You find you can cope. All is well and you and your boyfriend raise the child and live a happy life.

    On the other hand... You have the child. You try your best. Things dont work out. You give the child up for adoption.

    Least that way you gave it a shot, did what you wanted to do (go ahead with the pregnancy), and discovered your not yet ready to be a mother. Lesson learned and a family who cant have children may get a child and your mother can say 'i told you so'.

    All is well.
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    I found out i was 6 weeks pregnant 2 weeks ago. I don't believe in abortion and am in a stable relationship with my partner and we live in our own house. Therefore, we were overjoyed (once over the initial shock) and decided to keep it.

    Then a week later i lost the baby which devestated us both. So, we are going to try again although the baby i lose was an accidental pregnancy! But if you have thought about all the pros and cons and think having a baby is what you want then go for it.

    I am just going into my second year of uni but am still going to stay. You will be able to find a job eventually
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    (Original post by Hells_*****)

    Lets say you have this child. You find you can cope. All is well and you and your boyfriend raise the child and live a happy life.

    On the other hand... You have the child. You try your best. Things dont work out. You give the child up for adoption.

    Least that way you gave it a shot, did what you wanted to do (go ahead with the pregnancy), and discovered your not yet ready to be a mother. Lesson learned and a family who cant have children may get a child and your mother can say 'i told you so'.

    All is well.

    Well you can tell you're not a parent!! Believe me it is not that easy, you cant just 'give it a shot' and become a parent and then decide you don't like it and give the baby up for adoption!!!! I can't even begin to explain how ridiculous that is
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    (Original post by Trigger)
    I dunno i do data entry and if i dont enter that data who knows what might happen :zomg:
    thanks for saving the world
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    (Original post by mattydedon)
    thanks for saving the world
    No worries :cool:
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    (Original post by Laura_Cardiff)
    Well you can tell you're not a parent!! Believe me it is not that easy, you cant just 'give it a shot' and become a parent and then decide you don't like it and give the baby up for adoption!!!! I can't even begin to explain how ridiculous that is
    Well what the hells wrong with it? D:<

    Besides, people give kids up for adpotion all the time. Dont hear them saying 'its rediculous!' =____=
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    its not the concept of adoption thats ridiculous, its your idea that she just 'give parenting a shot' and if all does not work out its fine and dandy to just give the child up when you've had enough! You carry your child for 9 months and you then bring him or her in to the world, it must be excruciating enough to have to give the child up then let alone after weeks or months or caring for the child, feeding them and bonding with them, washing and clothing them and doing everything a mother or father does!!
    Adoption is not quite as simple and easy as you seem to think it is.
 
 
 
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