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I think I'm on the verge of becoming a psychopath. Watch

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    (Original post by Hanc)
    I know, i read that too. But think i am manipulating them, because they just think i am someone that needs help. I let everyone work for me that way. I don't know something else.
    I am this way, because there is nothing behind that behaviour, no person, no feelings, i don't identify myself with anyone and i don't feel empathy.
    I feel better when people are crying, or sad.
    I will do anything to keep them that way.
    Also threatening with suicide (i already ordered pills, i am trying to really want it)
    Look at what you're saying. It reads like somebody who's spent far too much time reading internet articles on the 'traits of Psychopathy'.

    It's not me you need to convince, and quite frankly, I find it pretty amusing that you have tried to (you claim) convince a Psychologist (of all people on this planet) of your 'condition'.
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    (Original post by Joel4fun4u)
    Look at what you're saying. It reads like somebody who's spent far too much time reading internet articles on the 'traits of Psychopathy'.

    It's not me you need to convince, and quite frankly, I find it pretty amusing that you have tried to (you claim) convince a Psychologist (of all people on this planet) of your 'condition'.
    I know , well i see that i manipulate people with how i am. I know there is something wrong with me, when i am in a group of people i need them, but leave them as soon as they ask things of me.
    Even people i know for 10 years, i don't care about them. I don't even care about my parents i think.
    I just want people to feel sad, then i feel i have control over them. And control "something".
    They can't do or be what they want. (especially weak girls/women i am controlling them).
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    (Original post by Hanc)
    I know , well i see that i manipulate people with how i am. I know there is something wrong with me, when i am in a group of people i need them, but leave them as soon as they ask things of me.
    Even people i know for 10 years, i don't care about them. I don't even care about my parents i think.
    I just want people to feel sad, then i feel i have control over them. And control "something".
    They can't do or be what they want. (especially weak girls/women i am controlling them).
    I think you're a complete idiot, and I don't care what you think about that. I guess by your thinking that makes me a Psychopath too!
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    Believe me, this stuff about having the urge to run somebody on the road is absolutely normal! Lots of people experience these kinds of temptations such as "OMG, I could actually push this old lady in front of the bus". And in many cases people feel themselves actually raising their arms to push this woman, but they won't. They're not actually insane, and the main reason why is because they atually know what they're doing is wrong, and they cannot possibly do that. And that guilt and those morals are what stops you from doing it.

    If you were a psychopath, you'd just do those things and wouldn't think anymore of it. The fact that you're self-reflecting and noticing these things are what is keeping you sane and stopping you from doing them.

    About these fantasies of saving people and dying, yet again, normal. Loads of people daydream or fantasize about saving somebody from a runaway train or something and maybe even dying in the process. This is proably indicating that you are desiring respect and to be admired, and you really want it that you'd die for it. If I was by you I'd be your friend and give you it.

    I don't think you're insane, but you could be suffering from depression or somthing, which you need to see a doctor about or a psychotherapist about because it can manifest.

    Good thing to so in the meantime would be to go outside. You don;t necessarily have to do anything, you can walk somewhere if you want, sit in your back garden. Anywhere there is natural light, just sit there for a bit. This exposure to the sun will help you produce Vitamin D and serotonin, which is what peoplewho suffer from depression lack usually. Going on sunbeds (which I don't really advise regularly) or going on holiday would be beneficial. The going on holiday (if possible) would eb more beneficial as you'd be getting a good dose of sunlight (if you go to a hotter country) and you'd e in a different place, which would be a useful break for you from your usual 'life'. It can help you get a grounded perspective on things and clear your mind.

    PM me if you wanna chat about it.
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    (Original post by AnthonyShock)
    Believe me, this stuff about having the urge to run somebody on the road is absolutely normal! Lots of people experience these kinds of temptations such as "OMG, I could actually push this old lady in front of the bus". And in many cases people feel themselves actually raising their arms to push this woman, but they won't. They're not actually insane, and the main reason why is because they atually know what they're doing is wrong, and they cannot possibly do that. And that guilt and those morals are what stops you from doing it.

    If you were a psychopath, you'd just do those things and wouldn't think anymore of it. The fact that you're self-reflecting and noticing these things are what is keeping you sane and stopping you from doing them.

    About these fantasies of saving people and dying, yet again, normal. Loads of people daydream or fantasize about saving somebody from a runaway train or something and maybe even dying in the process. This is proably indicating that you are desiring respect and to be admired, and you really want it that you'd die for it. If I was by you I'd be your friend and give you it.

    I don't think you're insane, but you could be suffering from depression or somthing, which you need to see a doctor about or a psychotherapist about because it can manifest.

    Good thing to so in the meantime would be to go outside. You don;t necessarily have to do anything, you can walk somewhere if you want, sit in your back garden. Anywhere there is natural light, just sit there for a bit. This exposure to the sun will help you produce Vitamin D and serotonin, which is what peoplewho suffer from depression lack usually. Going on sunbeds (which I don't really advise regularly) or going on holiday would be beneficial. The going on holiday (if possible) would eb more beneficial as you'd be getting a good dose of sunlight (if you go to a hotter country) and you'd e in a different place, which would be a useful break for you from your usual 'life'. It can help you get a grounded perspective on things and clear your mind.

    PM me if you wanna chat about it.
    This, completely agree.
    If you were a psychopath, you wouldn't be thinking about it, you'd be just doing it.
    You may well have mental issues that need addressing, and you may be suffering from depression, but you are as close to being a psychopath as everyone else is. (Just a turn of the steering wheel away :rolleyes: )
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You don't realise how much I lie though. I'm pretty sure I'm the text book definition of a Machiavellian personality. I lie for sympathy, for money, and for no reason at all. That's why I'm not sure what to do.
    Cant be as bad as my mate: She lied to one (out of 5) guys she was seeing. Said she had a brother in afganistan and hadnt heard from him in weeks and was scared he was dead and all this crazy stuff.

    He brought her looooads of free drinks!

    She doesnt even have a brother.

    Just start telling the truth. Write a diary and show them if thats easier.
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    Who else thinks this guys going to turn into the next news story about some randomer who shoots their entire class then commits suicide?
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    Wow strong psychiatrist.... as long as you don't start killing people it's fine to feel like you do? Why do we pay them again?

    Funnily enough from reading what you said , I think you are very depressed. I don't think you are a psychopath. I sense anger but I think mainly due to self loathing. Depression isn't just feeling sad, it can cause men in particular to be violent. If you were a psychopath I really doubt you'd be making posts like this asking 'whats wrong with me' or voluntarily going to shrinks.

    Maybe ask your GP to see someone else? Remember that most people if you look into the recesses of their minds think all kinds of weird things, you'd be surprised. I do think you need someone to talk to.
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    (Original post by AnthonyShock)
    Good thing to so in the meantime would be to go outside. You don;t necessarily have to do anything, you can walk somewhere if you want, sit in your back garden. Anywhere there is natural light, just sit there for a bit. This exposure to the sun will help you produce Vitamin D and serotonin, which is what peoplewho suffer from depression lack usually. Going on sunbeds (which I don't really advise regularly) or going on holiday would be beneficial. The going on holiday (if possible) would eb more beneficial as you'd be getting a good dose of sunlight (if you go to a hotter country) and you'd e in a different place, which would be a useful break for you from your usual 'life'. It can help you get a grounded perspective on things and clear your mind.

    PM me if you wanna chat about it.
    Yeah a nice melanoma will cheer him up.
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    (Original post by AnthonyShock)
    Believe me, this stuff about having the urge to run somebody on the road is absolutely normal! Lots of people experience these kinds of temptations such as "OMG, I could actually push this old lady in front of the bus". And in many cases people feel themselves actually raising their arms to push this woman, but they won't. They're not actually insane, and the main reason why is because they atually know what they're doing is wrong, and they cannot possibly do that. And that guilt and those morals are what stops you from doing it.

    If you were a psychopath, you'd just do those things and wouldn't think anymore of it. The fact that you're self-reflecting and noticing these things are what is keeping you sane and stopping you from doing them.

    About these fantasies of saving people and dying, yet again, normal. Loads of people daydream or fantasize about saving somebody from a runaway train or something and maybe even dying in the process. This is proably indicating that you are desiring respect and to be admired, and you really want it that you'd die for it. If I was by you I'd be your friend and give you it.

    I don't think you're insane, but you could be suffering from depression or somthing, which you need to see a doctor about or a psychotherapist about because it can manifest.

    Good thing to so in the meantime would be to go outside. You don;t necessarily have to do anything, you can walk somewhere if you want, sit in your back garden. Anywhere there is natural light, just sit there for a bit. This exposure to the sun will help you produce Vitamin D and serotonin, which is what peoplewho suffer from depression lack usually. Going on sunbeds (which I don't really advise regularly) or going on holiday would be beneficial. The going on holiday (if possible) would eb more beneficial as you'd be getting a good dose of sunlight (if you go to a hotter country) and you'd e in a different place, which would be a useful break for you from your usual 'life'. It can help you get a grounded perspective on things and clear your mind.

    PM me if you wanna chat about it.
    I don't have the urge to run somebody over, i did cause an accident and didn't feel a thing for him, although his face was covered with blood.
    I was more scared of getting caught.
    Manipulation and not caring, threatening to kill yourself, getting aggresive and thinking about killing someone to get what you want, is in my eyes psychopathic.
    I am never very happy, or deeply depressed, it just that i have shallow emotions.
    And i don't care of feel what other people want.
    I just want them to do what i want them to.
    And i think i will go very far for that.
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    (Original post by Hanc)
    I don't have the urge to run somebody over, i did cause an accident and didn't feel a thing for him, although his face was covered with blood.
    I was more scared of getting caught.
    Manipulation and not caring, threatening to kill yourself, getting aggresive and thinking about killing someone to get what you want, is in my eyes psychopathic.
    I am never very happy, or deeply depressed, it just that i have shallow emotions.
    And i don't care of feel what other people want.
    I just want them to do what i want them to.
    And i think i will go very far for that.
    Somebody mentioned earlier that a diary would be a good idea. It would work well in 2 ways:

    ONE: When you write down your thoughts, the train slows down. Right now all kinds of thoughts are running through your head Im guessing. By writing them down, not necessarily obeying any grammar rules or spelling (forget those for now), you will slow down your thoughts and be able to sequence them much more carefully.

    TWO: You mentioned how you keep lieing to the therapist. You could just be wanting to save face maybes? Do you feel like your problems give you a sense of shame and make you think "I feel so pathetic for being like this"? Lieing during your consultation will mean the therapist won't be able to do anything for you that will work. Seriously. You could even end up being suspected of suffering from something much worse! I really wouldn't like that to happen to you, as it can affect your chances of getting a job. Presenting this diary will be a more indirect way of communicating your real problems, so you won't end up lieing in the heat of the moment.

    Another bit of advice, try art. This can really get your nature down on something. You don't need to do the whole canvas and oils, but you certainyl can if thats how you want to express yourself. You could even show these to your therapist.

    You cannot expect somebody else to save you from this, you have to make an effort as well to change yourself and make yourself better.
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    (Original post by AnthonyShock)
    Somebody mentioned earlier that a diary would be a good idea. It would work well in 2 ways:

    ONE: When you write down your thoughts, the train slows down. Right now all kinds of thoughts are running through your head Im guessing. By writing them down, not necessarily obeying any grammar rules or spelling (forget those for now), you will slow down your thoughts and be able to sequence them much more carefully.

    TWO: You mentioned how you keep lieing to the therapist. You could just be wanting to save face maybes? Do you feel like your problems give you a sense of shame and make you think "I feel so pathetic for being like this"? Lieing during your consultation will mean the therapist won't be able to do anything for you that will work. Seriously. You could even end up being suspected of suffering from something much worse! I really wouldn't like that to happen to you, as it can affect your chances of getting a job. Presenting this diary will be a more indirect way of communicating your real problems, so you won't end up lieing in the heat of the moment.

    Another bit of advice, try art. This can really get your nature down on something. You don't need to do the whole canvas and oils, but you certainyl can if thats how you want to express yourself. You could even show these to your therapist.

    You cannot expect somebody else to save you from this, you have to make an effort as well to change yourself and make yourself better.
    ONE: Stop giving attention to the attention seeker.

    TWO: Stop encouraging the attention seeker.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    To put it bluntly, for the past few years I've had these urges/fantasies to kill or hurt people. They always end up with me either killing a lot of people for no reason, or killing someone but in a heroic fashion (i.e. killing a suicide bomber and saving others) but both always end in my death.
    I've seen a psychiatrist about this but he just told me that as long as they don't manifest into physical actions I'll be alright (no ****, doc).

    I don't usually care about these anymore, as it is a daily occurrence, but recently I've been forcing myself to stop doing something, like in my driving lessons sometimes I have to use all my willpower to stop from running someone over and I'll start to drift towards them when my instructor will say something and I'll snap out of it. The worst is when I'll be walking down the street and I'll be coming up to someone and I'll clench my fist, ready to hit them - no matter who they are.

    I also can't say "I love you too" to my parents, they say it to me and I just have to stay quiet, I can't say something that I don't mean.
    I've been depressed for a few years now, having seen a few psychologists, I really want to fix myself - just typing this is making me want to cry right now. I'm finding that I just keep randomly bursting into tears and I really want to end it, but I just don't have the balls.

    I want to see a psychologist again, but I just don't know how to say this stuff, every time I've been I've lied to them. I arrange a meeting then when I get there I just say "no, everything is alright now" and that's that. I'm a compulsive liar, I lie to my friends and family for no reason, they are sometimes just "I can't go out today", even though I can, to sometimes big lies which I just make up on the spot.

    Worst of all though is that I truly hate myself. I hate the way I look, I hate my personality, I hate everything about myself. Sometime I think the only way to fix it is to end it, or live with a load of Buddhists for the rest of my life :p:

    I want to do something before I go to uni in September, because as it stands now I don't think I'll be able to cope. I'm not very good at making friends anyway, but I've changed so much over the past few years that I can't imagine liking myself, let alone someone else liking me.
    The fact that you have never acted on these shows that you're just a fantacist. In fact, I bet you love people coming here being, "Oh he's such a psycho!"

    Get over yourself, you aren't crazy and you aren't dangerous.
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    (Original post by Hanc)
    I know , well i see that i manipulate people with how i am. I know there is something wrong with me, when i am in a group of people i need them, but leave them as soon as they ask things of me.
    Even people i know for 10 years, i don't care about them. I don't even care about my parents i think.
    I just want people to feel sad, then i feel i have control over them. And control "something".
    They can't do or be what they want. (especially weak girls/women i am controlling them).
    You control your own life. That's all anybody controls.

    If you're so crazy then why have you come here asking for help. I bet you're mega pissed that this thread has become people ridiculing you for the attention seeking, Ed Gein wannabee that you are at this moment in time.
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    (Original post by Joel4fun4u)
    ONE: Stop giving attention to the attention seeker.

    TWO: Stop encouraging the attention seeker.
    So what should the attention seeker do? Stay in his room until he dies not eating.

    I didn't really eat much the last week. I didn't tell anyone so much. I just want to be destroyed. I want my body to give up, so i don't have to be here anymore where. i can't compete with people because they have emotions and feel responsibility for people and i don't.

    People always want to care for me, but i don't care about people.
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    (Original post by 300mg)
    You control your own life. That's all anybody controls.

    If you're so crazy then why have you come here asking for help. I bet you're mega pissed that this thread has become people ridiculing you for the attention seeking, Ed Gein wannabee that you are at this moment in time.
    I didn't come for help, i want nothing. I am just waiting until i will finally die. So it will be like i wasn't here.
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    (Original post by Hanc)
    I didn't come for help, i want nothing. I am just waiting until i will finally die. So it will be like i wasn't here.

    :woo:
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    i think your very brave for admitting this on here and its a start the fact you KNOW you have a problem and your seeing professionals to get it sorted
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    (Original post by 300mg)
    :woo:
    Yes i know it's not possible what i want, but i don't have a future i should get deadly sick.
    I wanted to take sleeping pills and put a bag over my head.
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    (Original post by .X.alysha.X.)
    I think you need to keep going back for help, untill they realise the seriousness of this
    this
 
 
 
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