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I have no friends, honestly, please help :( watch

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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Please stick with this, somebody.

    Well basically, I had a small group of friends at the start of year 7 but then we all sort of drifted apart and I became best friends with a girl who is still my best friend and we're in year 12 going on year 13, so that's great. But all of the years it's basically been just me and her hanging around together in school and outside of school, with no one else. Then we ended up having to spend time at school with a group of girls who liked her but hated ,(and bullied, physically and mentally), me. This ultimately led to incredibly low self esteem, depression and an anxiety disorder, and I stopped talking when I was in the room with these girls, but I didn't have close relationships with anyone other than my best friend so I stayed around. My best friend was obviously in an awkward situation, but they were forceful and made sure she stayed around and repeatedly asked her to go out places with them (right in front of my face).

    It wasn't so bad until sixth form, though, because I was amicable with everyone in my form from years 7 through 11 and I had another good close friend who I could spend time with. However, she's now left school and I'm in a form with my best friend, but only acquainted with everyone else in the form. When we go in the common room, everyone sits in little cliques, none of which I belong to, so me and my best friend end up sitting with the group that used to bully me- they're now amicable but still keep me at a distance and don't invite me to go anywhere with them. Now, in the summer holidays, I haven't seen anyone apart from my boyfriend, and my best friend once. Everyone on facebook is making plans and I keep trying to get myself included in them, but it's really obvious and everyone just ignores it. I keep posting really obvious statuses "I'm bored, someone take me out, let's go somewhere, what's everyone up to" etc etc etc but never any replies :sad: and I have no idea what else to do.

    I have my 18th birthday coming up and I'm not going to be able to do anything because I only have random friends in different places and not a particular group of friends. Everything else in my life is going well but I'm so desperately unhappy because I don't have any close friends, and I want to enjoy this last year of school

    Apart from when I was agoraphobic or when I had a panic disorder and I had to turn down people when they asked me to go out, I have no idea what has caused this. I'm always very friendly and push myself to make conversation, despite my lack of confidence. Everyone knows I'm recovered now but still I feel really left out. What can I possibly do which doesn't involve rudely pushing myself into a group of friends and probably being rejected?
    • #2
    #2

    I've got the same problem. I keep putting statuses on Facebook: "Let's do something you boring *****" or "Will one of my ignorant friends get off their fat arse, stop sucking their own **** and get out the house with me" but nothing works.
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    Try put yourself into different surroundings, places that you can meet people? And surely you'll be going to college/uni soon, so Im sure you'll meet people then sorry for the lame reply, dont know much what to say, though you sound like a cool person so I wouldnt deny your friendship (cheeeeese)
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    Lol I have friends. The problem is they're ALL in:

    Korea
    Lebanon
    France
    India
    Yorkshire
    Up North
    Away

    Literally. Booooo.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've got the same problem. I keep putting statuses on Facebook: "Let's do something you boring *****" or "Will one of my ignorant friends get off their fat arse, stop sucking their own **** and get out the house with me" but nothing works.
    Perhaps it's time for a change of tactics.

    OP: Maybe you're trying too hard? It sounds like you're getting yourself really worked up over this and hence perhaps making it seem more of an issue than it is. This will then impact upon your confidence and be glaringly obvious to anybody who does try to make conversation with you. Maybe you can speak to your mate and tell her how the new group have been to you and perhaps she will then be able to sort something out. Otherwise, don't be so harsh on yourself and just remember, whilst you do want to enjoy your last year, it is your last year and soon you won't have to worry about this again.
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    (Original post by hazelr)
    Try put yourself into different surroundings, places that you can meet people? And surely you'll be going to college/uni soon, so Im sure you'll meet people then sorry for the lame reply, dont know much what to say, though you sound like a cool person so I wouldnt deny your friendship (cheeeeese)
    Heh, thank you :p:
    I think I'm a good friend so I don't really know what's going on...it's an all girls school so I suppose it was always going to be really cliquey but mine is, to the extreme!
    Yeah, I'm looking forward to a fresh start at uni, but I just want to have a nice year with the people at school now...there are lots of really lovely people who I want to be friends with, but I'm just not part of their groups.
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    (Original post by Mr_Deeds)
    Perhaps it's time for a change of tactics.

    OP: Maybe you're trying too hard? It sounds like you're getting yourself really worked up over this and hence perhaps making it seem more of an issue than it is. This will then impact upon your confidence and be glaringly obvious to anybody who does try to make conversation with you. Maybe you can speak to your mate and tell her how the new group have been to you and perhaps she will then be able to sort something out. Otherwise, don't be so harsh on yourself and just remember, whilst you do want to enjoy your last year, it is your last year and soon you won't have to worry about this again.
    Well, she knows what the group are like, she's seen it in front of her own eyes, she doesn't even like them particularly if at all! But despite them not being the nicest of people, I'd gladly take the opportunity to be welcomed into their group, she's only trying to avoid the situation that I'm in, so I don't have any bad feelings about her, although she does keep explaining how awkward it is for her.
    I just feel like I'm going to look back at high school and think how much of a shame it is that I only made 2 or 3 really good friends in my whole time there.
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    lol, threads like these are old and boring. If you can't make friends (interacting with other human beings) what does that say about you. Not trying to be harsh, but hearing it like that may be the only way you will go outside and make some more mates (considering you claim to have none).
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    (Original post by Bubbles*de*Milo)
    Lol I have friends. The problem is they're ALL in:

    Korea
    Lebanon
    France
    India
    Yorkshire
    Up North
    Away

    Literally. Booooo.
    You have friends in India? :holmes:
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    why dont u enroll to a new college next year who do the same subjects/exam boards as you
    and just make a complete new start?
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    I'll be your friend OP, we can play charades!
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    (Original post by Lefty Leo)
    You have friends in India? :holmes:
    Until the summer ends, yes.
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    i dunno if ur really dat unlucky or ur personality alienates people. assuming u r dat unlucky, endure it a few more weeks till u start uni!!!
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    Ha, well if you ever get paranoid or scared that people wont like you for who you really are, then pretend to be what they want, like them, and then you can slowly be yourself, so you get their attention, and then get them to like you!

    Hm... If you know of any outside school activities that anyone does, you could maybe pretend you're wanting to do it, ask them if they think you could join, and then maybeask if you could go along with them? This will get you talking, and maybe even hanging out... Even if it was just saying "wunna get a coffee after?" or something like that

    And so I mentioned alot of pretending, which is very different from lying, and its all for a good cause, so its okay :L
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    (Original post by Bubbles*de*Milo)
    Until the summer ends, yes.
    :rofl: I thought you meant long distance friends there! :rolleyes:
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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by bigbhoy91)
    lol, threads like these are old and boring. If you can't make friends (interacting with other human beings) what does that say about you. Not trying to be harsh, but hearing it like that may be the only way you will go outside and make some more mates (considering you claim to have none).
    As I've described, I've tried my very best. There are just some very close knit groups who don't want anybody else to join. I can interact with other human beings and I do go outside
    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Bubbles*de*Milo)
    Lol I have friends. The problem is they're ALL in:

    Korea
    Lebanon
    France
    India
    Yorkshire
    Up North
    Away

    Literally. Booooo.
    I don't think this post helped the OP deal with their problem.
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    (Original post by Lefty Leo)
    :rofl: I thought you meant long distance friends there! :rolleyes:

    Um, no. I actually have irl friends >_<

    Actually, I have 3 friends in Korea; one is someone I hung out with quite a bit, the other is my best friend who before last month I saw almost everyday, and neither of them will be back for around 13 months. :sad:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't think this post helped the OP deal with their problem.

    My point was: OP is not the only one with friends who aren't around. ¬_¬
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Please stick with this, somebody.

    Well basically, I had a small group of friends at the start of year 7 but then we all sort of drifted apart and I became best friends with a girl who is still my best friend and we're in year 12 going on year 13, so that's great. But all of the years it's basically been just me and her hanging around together in school and outside of school, with no one else. Then we ended up having to spend time at school with a group of girls who liked her but hated ,(and bullied, physically and mentally), me. This ultimately led to incredibly low self esteem, depression and an anxiety disorder, and I stopped talking when I was in the room with these girls, but I didn't have close relationships with anyone other than my best friend so I stayed around. My best friend was obviously in an awkward situation, but they were forceful and made sure she stayed around and repeatedly asked her to go out places with them (right in front of my face).

    It wasn't so bad until sixth form, though, because I was amicable with everyone in my form from years 7 through 11 and I had another good close friend who I could spend time with. However, she's now left school and I'm in a form with my best friend, but only acquainted with everyone else in the form. When we go in the common room, everyone sits in little cliques, none of which I belong to, so me and my best friend end up sitting with the group that used to bully me- they're now amicable but still keep me at a distance and don't invite me to go anywhere with them. Now, in the summer holidays, I haven't seen anyone apart from my boyfriend, and my best friend once. Everyone on facebook is making plans and I keep trying to get myself included in them, but it's really obvious and everyone just ignores it. I keep posting really obvious statuses "I'm bored, someone take me out, let's go somewhere, what's everyone up to" etc etc etc but never any replies :sad: and I have no idea what else to do.

    I have my 18th birthday coming up and I'm not going to be able to do anything because I only have random friends in different places and not a particular group of friends. Everything else in my life is going well but I'm so desperately unhappy because I don't have any close friends, and I want to enjoy this last year of school

    Apart from when I was agoraphobic or when I had a panic disorder and I had to turn down people when they asked me to go out, I have no idea what has caused this. I'm always very friendly and push myself to make conversation, despite my lack of confidence. Everyone knows I'm recovered now but still I feel really left out. What can I possibly do which doesn't involve rudely pushing myself into a group of friends and probably being rejected?
    Dont you have friends that u talk 2 on msn or something? ask them if they want to do something 2moro :yes:
    if not feel free to add me on msn, i'm there if not out :yes:
    i enjoy random chats :yes:
 
 
 
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