Turn on thread page Beta

Is it wrong to have a relationship with someone when you still love your ex? watch

    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by James')
    This.

    Don't do this, or you'll get voted out of RL. (Real life, for those non-nerds).
    ok thanks for the tip :p:

    EDIT: i didn't mean her getting voted out/evicted. i meant people started not to like her anymore.
    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by XeaL`)
    Not in my opinion. I still love an ex of mine after a 16/17 month relationship after 8 months. I'm more than happy with my girlfriend at the moment and I don't consider it "wrong". You can't help how you feel afterall.
    Out of interest, does your current gf know? And if yes, how does she feel about it?
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    You can still love an ex - it is after all perfectly possible to love more than one person simultaneously - but you shouldn't be in love with them.
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    Well i think its okay to get in a relationship even though you still like your ex because frankly its the only way you'll forget about ure ex and in this you'll find someone you'll like more than your previous bf/gf
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by bluemax)
    Well i think its okay to get in a relationship even though you still like your ex because frankly its the only way you'll forget about ure ex and in this you'll find someone you'll like more than your previous bf/gf
    Yeah but in situations like mine, my bf at the time didn't make much effort and didn't want me to sleep over much because he felt like he was cheating thinking about his ex. Didn't tell me this at the time, never mentioned his ex, just turned things on me and dumped me because i questioned things.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    thats a contradiction. If he actually did have feelings for me, then how would hhim being with me be stringing me along if his feelings for me where genuine?
    Sorry I didn't really make myself clear there. Maybe he really liked you at the start, when you were first going out, and thought he was over his ex. But then he realised that he still loved her, and that's why he felt like he was cheating. I'm sure at the start of your relationship you were quite close?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by MewMachine)
    Sorry I didn't really make myself clear there. Maybe he really liked you at the start, when you were first going out, and thought he was over his ex. But then he realised that he still loved her, and that's why he felt like he was cheating. I'm sure at the start of your relationship you were quite close?
    We only lasted a month. So you reakon he rly liked me at the start, but then liked me less as time went on?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    We only lasted a month. So you reakon he rly liked me at the start, but then liked me less as time went on?
    Yeah. If you were a rebound for him it's quite likely he liked you a lot at first but those feelings quickly disappeared.

    Aww, I'm sorry It sucks being in that situation. Have you talked to him?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by MewMachine)
    Yeah. If you were a rebound for him it's quite likely he liked you a lot at first but those feelings quickly disappeared.

    Aww, I'm sorry It sucks being in that situation. Have you talked to him?
    We nearly got together in november, it didnt happen, then 5 months lasted he admitted he still had feelings for me and we got in a relationship after being friends.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by falls_whisper)
    Out of interest, does your current gf know? And if yes, how does she feel about it?
    Yes and she accepts it 'cause she knows how much I also despise her at the same time and her educational studies lead to an explanation as to why she was okay with this, hence my comment "you can't help what you feel". I have a very special girlfriend in my eyes (and not just because of this reason).
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    So hardly any of you agree my ex treated me like **** and was out of order.. nice.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    I still love my ex.... we broke up 2 years ago. Shortly afterwards, I got with someone else for a year. I didn't think about my ex at all when I got with the new guy, but now I've split up with my most recent ex I've started missing the old one again. Love is a *****h
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by smilee172)
    I still love my ex.... we broke up 2 years ago. Shortly afterwards, I got with someone else for a year. I didn't think about my ex at all when I got with the new guy, but now I've split up with my most recent ex I've started missing the old one again. Love is a *****h
    what about my situation?
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    So hardly any of you agree my ex treated me like **** and was out of order.. nice.
    I think he was out of order, and of course you deserve to be loved for who you are, definitely. that must hurt. Probably in his mind it wasn't that calculated though, like maybe he didn't realise before he went out with you he'd feel like that? emotions can be really confusing
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by MewMachine)
    Yeah. If you were a rebound for him it's quite likely he liked you a lot at first but those feelings quickly disappeared.

    Aww, I'm sorry It sucks being in that situation. Have you talked to him?
    then hes a *******?
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    what about my situation?
    Well in my opinion, if you still have feelings for an ex, you can still get with someone new. And after time, and growing close to that person, sharing new experiences together, you can gradually get over the ex. So I don';t think your ex was wrong to get with you because he still had feelings for someone else, it's not like he was planning to go off with her or something. Imagine if it was gonna take him say five years to get over her, you couldn't really expect him to wait that long to get with someone new. But obviously everyone's opinions on this will completely differ, that is just my two cents.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    I don't think it's wrong. I'm not talking about using someone as a rebound, I;m talking about moving on with your life when it's clear nothing is going to happen with that ex.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    then hes a *******?
    Not a *******, an idiot, and a confused one at that. I know it hurts to be treated like that, I had someone do it to me who I really liked and it makes you feel like **** because you feel really used. But I don't think he meant to hurt you, he just didn't think about it properly.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by smilee172)
    Well in my opinion, if you still have feelings for an ex, you can still get with someone new. And after time, and growing close to that person, sharing new experiences together, you can gradually get over the ex. So I don';t think your ex was wrong to get with you because he still had feelings for someone else, it's not like he was planning to go off with her or something. Imagine if it was gonna take him say five years to get over her, you couldn't really expect him to wait that long to get with someone new. But obviously everyone's opinions on this will completely differ, that is just my two cents.
    you dont think he was wrong?!

    he clearly couldnt have liked me much otherwise he would have tried harder to make it work..
    he blamef me for the reason we broke up and told me i was just paranoid...
    now he admits he still had feelings for his ex... to the extent where i would hardly ever sleep in his room and he gave me excuses like he was tired.. but really he just admitted it was coz he still thought about his ex. he lied to me when i was with him. its not like he tried to make it work with me, or was even honest about it. and if he really did just use me to get over his ex that really is the ****!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by EskimoJo)
    I don't think it's wrong. I'm not talking about using someone as a rebound, I;m talking about moving on with your life when it's clear nothing is going to happen with that ex.
    so you think its ok that he went out with me, made hardly an effort, wasn't honest with me, blamed me for why he didnt want to be with me, when actually the reason why he was so cold was coz he was still thinking about his ex to the extent where he didnt want me to sleep in his room sometimes coz he was thinking of her.. maybe u would think differently if u had been used..
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
Turn on thread page Beta
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: August 7, 2009
Poll
Who is most responsible for your success at university

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Write a reply...
Reply
Hide
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.