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Living together replaces 'dating' after age 20? Watch

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    (Original post by Couldxbe)
    Not everyone relies on their parents until they're 22...
    I didn't say they did.
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    (Original post by La Esmerelda)
    Bugger, this is terrible! Thanks for the warning OP
    Thanks for the warning? I'm afraid the OP is talking nonsense. Nearly all of my mates are older than 20, and none of them have moved in with girlfriends/boyfriends after a few weeks.
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    (Original post by Ilora-Danon)
    I didn't say they did.
    No But what you said is a contradiction anyway. Because if you don't have to worry about bills cos you live with your parents, how can you have freedom? Being 'free' isn't about going out and spending all your money on alcohol.
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    Hmm, I can sort of understand where you are coming from. I've never lived with someone but I can see how it goes quickly from dating to practically living together... but thats just hanging out at each others houses because its cheaper than going out all the time surely. Plus you would kinda run out of ideas if you had to have a proper date every couple of days haha
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    (Original post by Abhead)
    How is it chivalrous?
    You seem to be assuming that all/most women would want to be married before they live with someone, but male attitudes force them to compromise. I personally would never want to marry someone without living with them, who knows what you would be committing yourself to!
    I mean by dating, seeing each other, going through all the motions and allowing a relationship to develop without pressure and at it's natural pace.

    I would want to live with somebody before I married them though. We all have our foibles behind closed doors after all!

    (Original post by Tootles)
    You do seem to agree with a lot of what I say...

    :cheers: We're both awesome. :yep:
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    I've spent 2 yrs at uni, lived the life and now live with my bf. Stressing bout bills, food etc was the first thing I did soon aa I moved to uni, that mind thought hasn't changed. I didn't meet him at uni and our dates consisted of train trips to and from london just to spend 2 hrs together at a time. I still get to have a good time with my friends, and go home to a cuddle :p:
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    Um, I've never seen anyone do this... I'm 23 and not living with my bf yet. That's more because I was at uni til now and now I don't have a permanent job or anything and not sure what I'm donig so I'd like that sorted out before we move in. And have money of course! I've never seen anyone move in after a week or 2.
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    Since when?
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    as someone 3 months away from 20 this is quite scary and a little bit true i think...

    a couple of my friends who are dating and are at uni pretty much live with their girlfriends and boyfriends anyway. so it wouldn't really be a massive surprise if they did move in together.
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    (Original post by McFearless)
    as someone 3 months away from 20 this is quite scary and a little bit true i think...

    a couple of my friends who are dating and are at uni pretty much live with their girlfriends and boyfriends anyway. so it wouldn't really be a massive surprise if they did move in together.
    yes, this is what im talking about...then they stay in that type of relationship rut for say 2-10 years then get married
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    (Original post by Couldxbe)
    No But what you said is a contradiction anyway. Because if you don't have to worry about bills cos you live with your parents, how can you have freedom? Being 'free' isn't about going out and spending all your money on alcohol.
    All about the assumptions eh! I don't drink.

    I'm more free than two of my 20 year old friends who are tied down to a property, with a small dog, who work every hour god sends just to pay bills in between commuting back and forth to university. That to me isn't a 'life'.

    But we're all different and I'm sure they wouldn't want my life. That's the beauty of the 'individual'.
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    (Original post by Ilora-Danon)
    All about the assumptions eh! I don't drink.

    I'm more free than two of my 20 year old friends who are tied down to a property, with a small dog, who work every hour god sends just to pay bills in between commuting back and forth to university. That to me isn't a 'life'.

    But we're all different and I'm sure they wouldn't want my life. That's the beauty of the 'individual'.
    You have to grow up and stand on your own two feet at some point though.

    The only reason you don't have to pay the bills is because currently your parents are doing that for you. They have just embraced adult life before you. If you want to hang on to your youth as long as possible that is fine as long as your parents are ok with it, and nobody can blame you! but you shouldn't judge other people for chosing to live as adults just because you don't want to.
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    I never really planned to live with my bf but i spent sooooo much time staying at hi shouse last year that i barely saw my housemates anyway, plus he needed somewhere to live, so it kind of worked out. I think its a student thing. You get used to sharing houses with people!
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    (Original post by Abhead)
    You have to grow up and stand on your own two feet at some point though.

    The only reason you don't have to pay the bills is because currently your parents are doing that for you. They have just embraced adult life before you. If you want to hang on to your youth as long as possible that is fine as long as your parents are ok with it, and nobody can blame you! but you shouldn't judge other people for chosing to live as adults just because you don't want to.
    Tbh, I couldn't give two cents what they do. - it doesn't affect me in any way! I'm simply answering the OP's original question.

    We all make judgements on other people, that's life - and if you say you don't judge others, you're a liar. It's part of human nature.
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    (Original post by Ilora-Danon)
    Tbh, I couldn't give two cents what they do. - it doesn't affect me in any way! I'm simply answering the OP's original question.

    We all make judgements on other people, that's life - and if you say you don't judge others, you're a liar. It's part of human nature.
    I know we all make judgements, I'm just calling you out on one you have made because I think it is inaccurate.
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    I like Abhead - she makes sense.

    My current relationship is rather unique. We started talking last Christmas, and when we returned to university started a physical relationship, and after few weeks started going out as a couple; we lived right next door to one another. For months we saw each other every single day, and slept in the same bed. She had to move out at Easter, and went to live with a friend in a town 30 miles away. She obviously had to work to pay her way, which meant she could only come and see me from Sunday to Wednesday; she did this almost every week, and it was a little strained at points but it was not too bad.

    Since I have been back home she has visited me once - for three days - and I am going to stay at hers for two weeks next Wednesday. I have already sorted my accommodation for my final year, and I am not sure how our relationship will function from there since her housing contract ends in September, and she will be completing her final year too; we might even be in the same class for a unit too. She will probably stay at mine when she has classes but return home to work.

    After the final year I will have been going out with her for a year and a half, and I will be moving back home for the summer again. I will move somewhere different for postgraduate study next September; she has said she will come with me, which means that is the point were will probably end up moving in together - almost two years.
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    (Original post by Arturo Bandini)
    Thanks for the warning? I'm afraid the OP is talking nonsense. Nearly all of my mates are older than 20, and none of them have moved in with girlfriends/boyfriends after a few weeks.
    of course not after a few weeks. After about a year/2 years. But I had no idea that it kicked in that early.
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    (Original post by La Esmerelda)
    of course not after a few weeks. After about a year/2 years. But I had no idea that it kicked in that early.
    It kicks in when you want it to, it doesn't have to be when you've been going out for 1/2 years.
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    I know so many people doing this. I think a lot of it is to save money. But I do know one girl who is sharing a morgatge with her boyfriend! And the house is on the same road as her parents! I guess there is no specific age that's ideal to move in together, since you get couples who have been married for 20 years and have kids and then split up. I would never move in with a guy unless I was married to him. I just see it as when I get married I'm going to be with that person with the rest of my life (hopefully), so I might as well enjoy all the freedom now. It's not even like I'm that bothered about being wined and dines. It just seems like a hassle really. Sharing your bedroom and not having any personal space.

    Two of my mates met their current boyfriends while their BFs were still with thier ex's. They said they didn't felt pressured staying with their ex's cos they were living with them. So both guys went from living with one girlfriend to another.
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    (Original post by SerpentineLara)
    That would be considered moving waaaaaaaaay to fast in my book.

    Besides, chances are that you'll grow tired of each other if you spend every freaking day together.
    Nice sig. *drools*
 
 
 
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