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Why do i feel so horrible about a good friend having sex :( Watch

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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Anon or delete please

    Im a 17 boy, and one of my girly friends had sex with her boyfriend tonight. Weve known each other for quite a while, and got very close through some very bad times.

    I admit i did have a thing for her, but got shot down and had to swallow it. And ive never liked that she has boyfriends, and i was so happy in a horrible way that she broke up with her boyfriend.

    But now shes been going out with another guy for about 6 months, and hes horrible i really think he is. And they finally had sex and she lost her virginity, and i feel so so so so so so so so so so horrible and sick :'( my depression is flaring too. Why would i feel like this?

    Im a virgin still, and i just want her to be happy but i really cant stand that shes had sex with him :'(

    Help me understand
    • #2
    #2

    Your still jealoous or you care about her. You either love her or don't want her to get hurt. Be a man. Get over it.
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    Dude, feeling like this only means one thing. That you like her. I don't understand why u haven't realised this yet. U should have got her before others a long time ago, too late now.
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    Yep, you still like her, I'm afraid.
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    It sounds like you still like her :sadnod:

    In which case, pangs of jealously are normal in this situation.
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    u sound like u still like her.... try to get over it man.. don't get depressed over a girl who doesn't share the same feelings... so just try to be there for her
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    Aye, as everyone else has said, it's probably jealousy and the crippling (maybe) selfconscious thought that it could have been you who she lost her virginity to, however the past is the past, it's too late & you need to get over your feelings as best you can and be a good friend to her still.
    • #3
    #3

    Something similar is happening to me at the moment. Every time I try to get on top of it I lose it again and what's worse I think I am permanently alienating my friend in the process but I just can't help it . My brain just won't give it a rest.
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    move onto the next girl man. Shes taken.
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    Its one of two things; you're jealousy is crippling you into feeling like this (because i firmly believe its virtually impossible to truly eliminate feelings you have for someone who you really do like but don't return it)..

    or you see her as like a sister figure, because you've grown so close to her - you might feel she is family and therefore when she is frolicking with chaps, you instantly develop a concern for her well being. But by what you've described, it sounds like simple jealousy.

    Any advice? If you continue to stay near her and try to be friendly with her, you will continue to feel like this. She should not know how you feel; its not fair on her to have that guilt and you have already had a chance with her. Distancing yourself from her will give you time to reflect and think without distraction! Its not nice advice, but sometimes useful advice isnt the nicest.
    • #4
    #4

    you should get her boyfriend's social networking page passwords and fiddle with his pages. change the relationship status to single etc...nothing too obvious
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    Move it along please.
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    id put some distance between you and her and hang out with a few other friends a bit more.

    If you have feelings for her its only gonna get harder
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    The thing is she'll know you have feelings for her, I don't really understand women when it comes to this next point. She wont be attracted to you cause of this, but she'll like to keep you there ?weird right?) but thats how it works, whther its conscious or subconsciously.

    Best thing is to hit up other chicks, the other weird thing is, you doing the same thing as her with other girls, could make her feel the same as you, or not give a ****.
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    You say this guy is no good for her but if she had sex with him and have dated him for 6 months, they must be happy together.. It's obvious you still have feelings for her, but if you really like her then let her live her life.. I know it's very hard to do so but it's gonna be harder and harder if you hold on to her.. It's too late sadly..
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    You still like her, pretty much :sadnod: it's understandable that you feel jealous, but if she doesn't feel the same way then you're pretty much going to have to move on

    Sorry!
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    you're jealous and not getting any
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    you're in love with her
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    (Original post by Yawn11)
    The thing is she'll know you have feelings for her, I don't really understand women when it comes to this next point. She wont be attracted to you cause of this, but she'll like to keep you there ?weird right?) but thats how it works, whther its conscious or subconsciously.
    Shamefully this is actually true, I think its the subconscious feeling that a guy stopping fancying you must mean you've developed some kind of personality defect thats caused him to go off you. Or at least thats what I've sussed from myself :rolleyes:

    So OP, probably best not to tell her...especially since she's entered a more serious phase in her relationship with this guy you don't want to mess around with her feelings. Sounds like you DO still have feelings for her, either that or you just wish you had what she had? If you haven't had many girlfriends whilst she's been moving on to various boyfriends it might just feel unfair to you that she's doing this whilst you're kinda left behind.
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    Eugh, you're the type of guy girls despise...pretends to be a friend but secretly holds a torch. Its pure envy on your part, and to stop it you really need to cut contact with the girl. Don't try and kid us - you really couldn't give a **** about her friendship, you just want to put your dingle inside her.
 
 
 
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