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Dirty Rotten Cheat? watch

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    Ok... So i've been with this guy for just over 9months, hes the same age as me (18), hes lovely and I can honestly say he worships the ground I walk on, hes everything you would look for in a boyfriend. But we've found ourselves in abit of a 'Teenage Rut', nether of us being able to drive, not alot of money to do things together, routine.
    And the thing is i've been talking to this other guy over facebook and we've met up quite a few times, hes older (21), drives, dosent mind 'splashing out', good-looking AKA a big distraction from my 'rountine relationship'. So i've found myself thinking about this new guy alot, even though I know I broke all rules by just meeting up with him when I've got someone whocares about me as much as my boyfriend does.
    What i'm tryna ask is what would you do? I've got every intention of calling off this whole 'new guy' thing and pretending like nothing ever happened, as I really thing it'd break my boyfriends heart, and then talk it out with him about being stuck in this rut.
    Or would you tell him the truth? If you''ve ever been in a similar situation then what did you do?
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    You only live once. Do what makes you happy but be upfront and let everybody know where they stand. Nothing worse than a monotonous relationship, especially when you're so young.
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    Talk it out with your boyfriend first. Dont abandon it without even trying to fix the problemn at hand first? If nothing changes, still bored, whatever, then what must be must be or whatever. But yeah, give it a shot first. 9 months is something you dont just wanna throw away... But yeah.
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    The grass is always greener on the other side... remember that.
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    (Original post by little_red_sox)
    You only live once. Do what makes you happy
    You quoted me once when i said this was my philosophy on life. Now it's my turn to quote you. Bravo

    But OP should follow this advice. Sometimes when achieving happiness, you have to break a few boundaries.
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    Talk to your boyfriend first. I was in a similar position with my boyfriend before he went in the army. There's plenty of weird and wonderful date ideas where all you need is bus fare and a packed lunch. You don't want to hurt someone who cares about you so much.
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    Wise words. Thanks for not judgeing people
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    i think you shouldnt listen to 'you only live once, do what makes you happy' i think it only works if the situation involves you only, and has no consequesnces for anyone else... but here...you'd be making someone else's life a misery just for ur own happiness.
    you shouldnt give up on your current relationship, its 9 months!!!
    i think you should just forget about this 21 year old guy... and just be happy with your bf.. it WOULD break his heart
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    (Original post by Lalala_Bam)
    Ok... So i've been with this guy for just over 9months, hes the same age as me (18), hes lovely and I can honestly say he worships the ground I walk on, hes everything you would look for in a boyfriend. But we've found ourselves in abit of a 'Teenage Rut', nether of us being able to drive, not alot of money to do things together, routine.
    And the thing is i've been talking to this other guy over facebook and we've met up quite a few times, hes older (21), drives, dosent mind 'splashing out', good-looking AKA a big distraction from my 'rountine relationship'. So i've found myself thinking about this new guy alot, even though I know I broke all rules by just meeting up with him when I've got someone whocares about me as much as my boyfriend does.
    What i'm tryna ask is what would you do? I've got every intention of calling off this whole 'new guy' thing and pretending like nothing ever happened, as I really thing it'd break my boyfriends heart, and then talk it out with him about being stuck in this rut.
    Or would you tell him the truth? If you''ve ever been in a similar situation then what did you do?
    Would you be OK with your boyfriend dating a girl who is hotter than you, has more money and treats him nice? The answer is obviously no so you know what you are doing is wrong. If you thought it was correct behaviour you wouldn't have hid it in the first place.
    Be honest with everyone, tell them how you feel and dump the lad you cheat on. Ah and that lad 'splashing out' probably just wants sex then he won't really be that interested.
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    (Original post by Lalala_Bam)
    Ok... So i've been with this guy for just over 9months, hes the same age as me (18), hes lovely and I can honestly say he worships the ground I walk on, hes everything you would look for in a boyfriend. But we've found ourselves in abit of a 'Teenage Rut', nether of us being able to drive, not alot of money to do things together, routine.
    And the thing is i've been talking to this other guy over facebook and we've met up quite a few times, hes older (21), drives, dosent mind 'splashing out', good-looking AKA a big distraction from my 'rountine relationship'. So i've found myself thinking about this new guy alot, even though I know I broke all rules by just meeting up with him when I've got someone whocares about me as much as my boyfriend does.
    What i'm tryna ask is what would you do? I've got every intention of calling off this whole 'new guy' thing and pretending like nothing ever happened, as I really thing it'd break my boyfriends heart, and then talk it out with him about being stuck in this rut.
    Or would you tell him the truth? If you''ve ever been in a similar situation then what did you do?

    I've been with my boyfriend (18 going on 19) for 2 years and 2 months (I'm 17 going on 18). Neither of us can drive, have jobs, he's jobseeking and I'm at sixth form. For 2 years it's been this way, no jobs, no money, no transport, but we love each other more than anything so we get by. There is no WAY I would throw my relationship away for someone 'older' or 'with a car' or 'with more cash'. No WAY.
    I've met up and kissed 2 other people in the time that I've been with my boyfriend, and completely regretted it. Btw, they were both younger than him. I was completely 100% upfront and honest about it both times, first time we went on a break, second time I got dumped because it was, well, the second time I'd done it (we're now back together). Some of the biggest mistakes I ever made.

    If you love someone, you won't mind the 'routine'. In fact, you should love it. It would be wonderful to be able to go out places with my boyfriend- unlike you, I can't even go out at night with him because I'm under 18; to live with him, to drive around with him, to get engaged to him, but none of these things are possible. Just being in his arms is enough for me, though.
    Despite how lovely your guy is, you truly don't sound like you're in love with him. You've got to either commit or call it quits and play the field with these older guys. It's really about whatever you want. And you know what happened to me when I told the truth, but I couldn't possibly do anything else.
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    Typcial female going for the age card! theres a reason y the 21 year old is making an effort wit the girl three years younger! you just done know it yet! hoprfully your boy finds out and goes and gets himself and proper girl!
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    (Original post by Davezk)
    The grass is always greener on the other side... remember that.
    Oh and this completely. After 2 years (not 9 months!) of being with the same person, I romanticized about an affair with someone new and completely different. And I ended up completely heartbroken as a result of my actions!! All the time I was with this 'other guy', I felt sad and missed my long term boyfriend. There might have been more chemistry and more of a spark, but at the end of the day that eventually goes away in a relationship and you're left with something a lot more valuable.
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    (Original post by missaphrodite)
    I've been with my boyfriend (18 going on 19) for 2 years and 2 months (I'm 17 going on 18). Neither of us can drive, have jobs, he's jobseeking and I'm at sixth form. For 2 years it's been this way, no jobs, no money, no transport, but we love each other more than anything so we get by. There is no WAY I would throw my relationship away for someone 'older' or 'with a car' or 'with more cash'. No WAY.
    I've met up and kissed 2 other people in the time that I've been with my boyfriend, and completely regretted it. Btw, they were both younger than him. I was completely 100% upfront and honest about it both times, first time we went on a break, second time I got dumped because it was, well, the second time I'd done it (we're now back together). Some of the biggest mistakes I ever made.

    If you love someone, you won't mind the 'routine'. In fact, you should love it. It would be wonderful to be able to go out places with my boyfriend- unlike you, I can't even go out at night with him because I'm under 18; to live with him, to drive around with him, to get engaged to him, but none of these things are possible. Just being in his arms is enough for me, though.
    Despite how lovely your guy is, you truly don't sound like you're in love with him. You've got to either commit or call it quits and play the field with these older guys. It's really about whatever you want. And you know what happened to me when I told the truth, but I couldn't possibly do anything else.
    Quite hypocritical of you then as you yourself has cheated twice...
    I havent actually kissed the 21year old, and wouldnt whilst I'm still with my boyfriend. And I didnt actually say that I loved him, because I know if I did I wouldnt even think of meeting up with another guy because it just... well I just wouldnt feel the need to if I was 100% happy and in love.

    But ive made up my mind anyway. Thanks
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    If youre actually contemplating it because hes got a car and money what are you doing with your boyfriend now? :confused:

    Sounds like he deserves much better than you.
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    If the truth hurts, lie.

    (that is if it is not necessary to say anything, which I think is your situation. Theres no need to tell your boyfriend anything about this new guy if nothing has happened between you and the new guy, your boyfriend will just become insecure and upset)
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    Wow all this stuff about "you only live once" is a bunch of baloney and hyprocritical!

    Who says you guys won't have money all the time? When you get careers you'll have money + the guy of your dreams. If you go for the other guy, by the time you'll have a career you'll be "got the money + lost the best guy of my life a long time ago to some guy I dumped because he just wanted me for sex". You'll really regret it in the future if you can't find another guy as good as him and don't expect him back.

    Wow, just because you're contemplating this he deserves much better.
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    (Original post by Lalala_Bam)
    Quite hypocritical of you then as you yourself has cheated twice...
    I havent actually kissed the 21year old, and wouldnt whilst I'm still with my boyfriend. And I didnt actually say that I loved him, because I know if I did I wouldnt even think of meeting up with another guy because it just... well I just wouldnt feel the need to if I was 100% happy and in love.

    But ive made up my mind anyway. Thanks
    I was just trying to stop you making the mistake that I did, lol. I assumed you loved him because you've been with him such a long time that's all.
    So what's your decision?
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    Communication is key. Tell your boyfriend everything.
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    I talked it out with my boyfriend, told him how I felt, had a little cry etc etc but I didnt actually tell him about the other guy.
    We've come to a conclusion of just seeing each other at weekends so we dont get sick of the sight of oneanother, and only have to worry about trying to busy up our weekends together instead of a whole week. Hes not happy about this but I think in the longrun it'll make things better between us, giving us time to miss oneanother.
    Ive told the other guy that I didnt wanna ruin a good thing, and try and fix something that isnt really broken...
    Gawwwwwd sorry for the immense use of cheesy phrases
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    Wow you have been together nine months and you're only seeing eachother at weekends so you don't get sick of eachother, or rather, so you don't get sick of him. Do you actually like this guy?
 
 
 
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