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    (Original post by xwardax)
    He obviously thinks your better than them, that's why hes still with you and comes back to you. And when men get horny they think with their ding dongs and usually go for any stick wid balloons on her chest and a hole down there but when they snap out of that zombie period they realise who means what to them (i hope it makes sense) To me, i see a strip club in the same catergory as porn, men only use it to fantasize and what not.
    I must say that was a fantastic explanation about men being horny from a woman lol.
    • #2
    #2

    If my boyfriend did this i'd be extremely upset. Reason being he has cheated on me and likes to watch porn instead of doing stuff with me, so i feel worthless enough anyway. But i know most women aren't really bothered.
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    (Original post by Alexzander)
    The double standard thing isn't good at all.

    But other than that I wouldn't really mind. If my gf oogled at a guy walking down the street- so what? I can't pretend i don't do the same sometimes with girls because it's human nature. It's nothing to be jealous of. But that's where it ends; I don't approach them or do anything about it because I have someone I care about enough to not be interested. Hopefully he does too.
    Definatly second that one.

    My ex was way to paranoid, every girl I used to speak to, or even look at she'd have a go. Yet it was perfectly fine for her to have loads of lad mates and stuff.
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    If my boyfriend went to a strip club I don't think I'd care, I actually said he should go if his friends went one night we were all out.....as long as he didn't get a lap dance haha.

    Anyways, yeah I think you have a right to be pissed off seeing as got up you for having a poster.....seriously wtf would he get mad about that?

    The Vibrator, to put it politely tell him its better then you going out and getting off with someone else.
    • #3
    #3

    I've been through something similar so keep anon please.

    OP,

    I can totally understand you being upset and to be honest, I don't understand why the women here who say "I don't mind aslong as he comes back to me" can say that and not feel at all hurt that some stunning woman is all over their boyfriend.

    Even if he just watched them on stage, he was standing there watching a live woman in the flesh (therefore its not like porn..) and getting aroused by her when he has a girlfriend at home. In my eyes this is like cheating.

    My boyfriend went to a strip club and i felt SICK when i found out. I couldn't get intimate with him because all i could think about is him thinking about a stripper that night or wondering if he would prefer to be with her over me. im insecure to start with and it made me feel like crap..

    i dont have the best figure, ive got small boobs, im not tall, im just a normal fairly average to pretty woman... these women are perfect and it kills me that he would be in a place like that getting turned on by them.
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    Wouldn't be particularly bothered. Then again, depends if she went alone or simply followed her friends in.
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    ive had this debate so many times!...i honestly wouldn't mind as long as he didnt do it often...id be fine as long as he goes once in a while or on occassions..he can look as long as he comes home to me in the end!!! im not too crazy possessive or jealous...i dont think its the issue that he went but more of a problem that hes acting like a complete hypocrite...talk to him, he sounds a bit controlling if you ask me...
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    I could never bring myself to go to a strip club. I think its a form of objectification of both men and women. I am very open minded as regards sexuality, I even support regulated legalisation of prostitution, but I do have a problem with stripping for money in a club.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've been through something similar so keep anon please.

    OP,

    I can totally understand you being upset and to be honest, I don't understand why the women here who say "I don't mind aslong as he comes back to me" can say that and not feel at all hurt that some stunning woman is all over their boyfriend.

    Even if he just watched them on stage, he was standing there watching a live woman in the flesh (therefore its not like porn..) and getting aroused by her when he has a girlfriend at home. In my eyes this is like cheating.

    My boyfriend went to a strip club and i felt SICK when i found out. I couldn't get intimate with him because all i could think about is him thinking about a stripper that night or wondering if he would prefer to be with her over me. im insecure to start with and it made me feel like crap..

    i dont have the best figure, ive got small boobs, im not tall, im just a normal fairly average to pretty woman... these women are perfect and it kills me that he would be in a place like that getting turned on by them.

    i genuinely wouldn't mind...its not really cheating, merely looking..you sound very paranoid and way too insecure if you don't mind me saying...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    i dont have the best figure, ive got small boobs, im not tall, im just a normal fairly average to pretty woman... these women are perfect and it kills me that he would be in a place like that getting turned on by them.

    I don't understand this. You would be way more beautiful than any stripper to him. Here's the deal; strippers can be hot and sexy but not really beautiful. Which do you prefer? Your forgetting one of the biggest turn ons- character and personailty.

    I could fantasise about a stripper but i couldn't imagine myself ever dating or falling in love with one. Maybe that sounds really shallow, I don't know. I don't mean it to be. But honestly, if he's anything like me; sure the stripper may be hot, but in his head you'll be worth 100000X more.
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    I wouldn't really care. Nor would I make a fuss because he made a fuss and I want things to be 'fair' and equal.
    If you genuinely don't like what he's done though, regardless of it he had let you keep your poster/vibrator, then talk to him about your boundaries.
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    (Original post by sulpicia)
    I could never bring myself to go to a strip club. I think its a form of objectification of both men and women. I am very open minded as regards sexuality, I even support regulated legalisation of prostitution, but I do have a problem with stripping for money in a club.
    So...you support a culture where people are taken from their family and basically raped or are forced to sell themselves for whatever reason....but watching a girl in a club is wrong?
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    (Original post by sulpicia)
    I could never bring myself to go to a strip club. I think its a form of objectification of both men and women. I am very open minded as regards sexuality, I even support regulated legalisation of prostitution, but I do have a problem with stripping for money in a club.
    I don't get that! Could you explain why please? :yy:
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    I wouldn't be particularly bothered. I would, however, be annoyed about the vibrator/poster thing because that's just silly (especially the latter!), and also kinda hypocritical.
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    (Original post by randomgirl)
    I wouldn't mind the fact he'd been to a strip club, but I'd be annoyed by his comments re: your poster and getting a vibrator.
    This :yep:
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    I don't really see the issue. Look but don't touch, what's wrong with that? It's human nature for a straight man to be attracted to women. It'd be naive of you to think he would be attracted to nobody but you. Just because he wants to see some skank dancing around in a silver bikini for some dollar, doesn't mean he'd want to take her to meet the parents.

    Vibrator = Since when did he become boss of your vagina? :lolwut:
    Poster = Tell him to grow up.
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    I hate it when other girls are like “it’s only a strip club, get over it, it’s not cheating”.

    If you are uncomfortable with it then you have a right to expect your boyfriend to respect your feelings. It’s not being controlling, it’s asking for someone who claims to love you to not do something that hurts you.

    If my boyfriend thought this was unreasonable, he wouldn’t be right for me. Whether a thousand other girls are cool with it or not.

    And I know it's fair to say "yeah but it's not like he's gonna fall in love with her" - so what? I don't like the idea of my boyfriend thinking about shagging some cheap girl in a strip club and then having sex with me. Makes me feel second best, insecure & jealous. Someone that loves you doesn't make you feel like that.
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    (Original post by EskimoJo)
    I don't get that! Could you explain why please? :yy:
    They mean they don't have a problem with people having sex for money, but he does have a problem with people taking their clothes off for money.

    Indeed.
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    (Original post by oh_adele)
    I don't really see the issue. Look but don't touch, what's wrong with that? It's human nature for a straight man to be attracted to women. It'd be naive of you to think he would be attracted to nobody but you. Just because he wants to see some skank dancing around in a silver bikini for some dollar, doesn't mean he'd want to take her to meet the parents.

    Vibrator = Since when did he become boss of your vagina? :lolwut:
    Poster = Tell him to grow up.
    That is not the point at all. I'm not so arrogant that I think I'm the only person my boyfriend finds attractive, but that doesn't mean he should parade that point around & shove it in my face.
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    My boyfriend went to a gentlemen's evening for a rugby thing, and there was strippers there, at first I didnt mind until I got a drunken phone call asking would i be mad if the stripper had stripped him down to just his boxers! I found out the next morning this was what had happened.
    I was pissed off at this, but 2 years down the line we're still together.
    But you should let him know your annoyed, if you don't put your foot down now, he'll always control you for example the vibrator and poster, and then go and please himself at a strip club!
 
 
 
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