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Don't have a relationship with my dad even though we live under the same roof Watch

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    #1

    Hey, I've just posted on here because I've had enough of my dad and can't take the way he treats and talks to me anymore.

    Basically everything started when I was a child when he use to physically and mentally abuse me (lower form). For example I've always hated maths and he always use to force me to do it on the summer holidays for 6 hours straight with no break (12pm - 6pm) and when I got a question wrong he'd shout at me and throw the paper i was working on at me. He also said that i was useless, a fool and always said I haven't brought you to england to play (my mum brought me, he came later) but to work all the time instead. Luckily my mum has always been there, but whenever she wasn't he'd treat me like ****. There are so many other things i could write but I would go on forever

    Now that I'm 18 the physical and mental abuse has stopped, but the same old treating me like ***** is still here. For example a student finance letter came through and he said " you come here and sit down there" and starting shouting and frowning just to tell me that i should show him letters that come through from student finance. I thought he could have just done this in a more politer, calmer way. He also forces me to cook food for him and never says please or thank you unless my mum is around. he also doesn't allow me the freedom to do what I want. I said to him last week that i wanted to go on a camp, but he said i should forget it because it's not Catholic, even though they believe in the same thing. Also i can't go out without him trying to extract everything out of me i.e where you going, what you going to be doing there etc. He asks all these questions in an aggressive tone.

    It's just so hard for me to truly explain how i feel on TSR, but i hope some of you understand.I just can't help feeling bitter because I've had enough of it. i hate people when they say I look at him and i also struggle to call him dad. Just everything revolves around him. he's basically trying to control my life. for example last week he told me that i have to go back to x country to do national service, completely disregardging what i want to do after uni.

    Sorry for the over-long post, i just can't take it any more.Also for any grammatical errors you see throughout.
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    Hm, my parents get like this at times, I know it's quite horrible.

    How old are you? Any chance of moving out?
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    run away and dont look back!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by Democracy)
    Hm, my parents get like this at times, I know it's quite horrible.

    How old are you? Any chance of moving out?
    18 and if I get the grades I'll be going to uni.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    18 and if I get the grades I'll be going to uni.
    Well there you have it then, hopefully in a month you should be gone. Until then, stay low and bide your time, keep thinking of uni.
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    Look towards the fact you'll be moving to uni soon and that you will be away from him when you do. Have you tried talking to your mum about this? She might be able to help, but in the mean time remain strong. Who knows, when you go to uni your relationship could improve..
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    It's not too long 'til you go to uni. I know what it's like to just loathe your dad and still have to live with him - I've not spoken to my dad in 4 years now, but I still have nightmares about him coming back, it was that bad. Not long, and you'll have your freedom, sod him!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by letsdothetimewarpagain)
    Look towards the fact you'll be moving to uni soon and that you will be away from him when you do. Have you tried talking to your mum about this? She might be able to help, but in the mean time remain strong. Who knows, when you go to uni your relationship could improve..
    Thank you!! My mum always sides with him because she has to. i really hope it does improve, but i just think there is too much bitterness inside of me.
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    Don't worry, you're not alone, for sure.
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    Are you male or female?

    Nut him.
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    (Original post by Nick_000)
    Are you male or female?

    Nut him.
    Yes great idea, nut him so that he is more likely to do it back... Don't rise to his standards, it won't make anything better. (:
    • #2
    #2

    just look forward to moving out
    thats what i am doing but i have 2 years.
    • #3
    #3

    I have had a not to bad relationship with my dad, however through my teens it began to go downhill, we would have fights about stupid things. I once had a fight and never spoke to him for over 6 months. However about a year ago things seemed to be ok with us, we have never been close (he's more closer with my sister) but the other day we had a fight over a cake! how sad eh?

    Anyway I get on with my mum very well, however it feels as if i'm an outsider. I've felt like this since I was about 12/13. I tend to stay up in my bedroom and always go out with my friends or my mum. I don't really see my dad and my sister as family, they are just people who live in the same house as me. I'm also going to university in september! so will be able to get away from both of them.

    However I will miss my mum and both my dogs, but it will be nice to have a fresh start. I do know what it's like to hate your dad. I hate mine now. Your not alone! and to be honest you don't really need to be hurt and upset as he is not worth it. Do what I do, keep your head down and the weeks will fly by!
    Good luck and don't bother listening to your dad, cause he sucks!
 
 
 
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