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Favourite Comedian Quotes watch

    • Thread Starter

    Here's some ...
    My dad is Irish and my mum is Iranian, which meant that we spent most of our family holidays in customs. - Patrick Monahan

    Christmases were terrible, not like nowadays when kids get everything. My sister got a miniature set of perfumes called Ample. It was tiny, but even I could see where my dad had scraped off the S ... - Stephen K Amos

    I'm a Jew, by the way. It was my agent's idea. - Simon Amstell

    As of last month we have gay bishops, official. I wonder if this will filter down into the game of chess? Those bishops can make all the same moves, but can only be taken from behind. - Jason Wood

    Americans only re-elected George Bush to prove they had a sense of irony. - Scott Capurro

    Two guys came knocking at my door once and said: "We want to talk to you about Jesus." I said: "Oh, no, what's he done now?" - Kevin McAleer

    What Iran needs now is a more modern leader - a mullah lite. - Shappi Khorsandi

    People who say they don't swear haven't had the right sex or food. - Russell Howard

    I grew up in Braintree, the most ironically named town in Britain - there being neither a brain nor a tree for miles around. In Braintree, they think irony comes from elephants. - Luke Wright

    I've got no problem buying tampons. I'm a modern man. But apparently, they're not a "proper present". - Jimmy Carr

    "Politicians are like God. No one believes in them, they haven't done anything for ages, and they give jobs to their immediate family" – Andy Zaltzman

    "I like David Beckham. Most of us have skeletons in our closet. But he takes his out in public" – Andrew Lawrence

    I'm the eldest of five children. My parents aren't Catholic, just reckless" – Danielle Ward

    "I've got nothing against disabled people, I've even got one of their stickers on my car" – Damian Callinan

    Ok, there's quite a few ...

    Basically, everything that Frankie Boyle says :awesome:
    • Thread Starter

    (Original post by somethingbeautiful)
    Basically, everything that Frankie Boyle says
    How do you mean? There weren't any Frankie quotes on there. Although he is a ledge :rolleyes:

    (Original post by mystiquelol)
    How do you mean? There weren't any Frankie quotes on there. Although he is a ledge :rolleyes:
    No, I used a smiley but for some reason it's putting links to smileys instead of displaying them. It's done the same in your original post too...strange.
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