Sorry to be blunt, but it seems you have decided that you think you are autistic and won't listen to anything one of us says, and from my view, it almost looks like you don't want help from tsr, you want to shout from the rooftops about your problems, without listening to a thing anyone else says.
Maybe I'm wrong, if I am, what do you want from this thread? Because we can't diagnose you, we can't give you the specialist help you would need if you were autistic, and all we can really do is argue this around with you and tell you to go to a doctor if you're that worried.
Plenty of people (including me) don't talk in social situations and suffer from shyness, that's normal. And it's normal not to like being shy, but really all the cliches that you're coming up with like 'admitting it is the first step to recovery' isn't erally washing well,
I wont settle for anything else!