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Hanging around with Mates

Posting this anonymous incase my mates come on here, don't think they do but there's a chance.

Firstly I am obviously a student like most of us here and I have been looking for a job over summer but haven't found one so I'm just living off my money left from last semester. Now I have about £200 left until the end of September, so nearly 2 months, not bad really but my mates go out a lot. I don't mind going out but then a few of them get really whingy when you say you're trying to save a bit of money or you make up an excuse. One or two of our mates are making excuses all the time and we don't see them that much but I'm not like that. By this point I don't think I'll be able to keep up with all these nights out and trips to the cinema or whatever they have planned next. It's starting to p*ss me off how one or two of them feel they have the right to moan when I don't go out even though they've done it themselves and I haven't moaned about them and I don't think I've made an excuse to not go out for almost the whole of summer.

Have any of you experienced this in your group of friends and what did you do?

I'm not really one to start arguing over stuff like this and I don't tend to speak my mind on stuff like this because the two that do moan a bit get sarcastic and you can never really talk seriously with them when it comes to these situations. What annoyed me recently is that I've been asked to go out tomorrow night (well tonight now as it's Saturday) when on Sunday I have important stuff to do so need to feel refreshed for it and also due to trying to save some cash. When I mentioned this I was told to "not be gay". I just find the whole thing annoying, their attitude towards me even though I'm always out with them and the way they don't seem to take into consideration that people need to do stuff other than go out blowing all of their money on drinking. I haven't a clue how they seem to be keeping up with going out like, from a health stand point and a money stand point.

Anyone?

Just say to them 'Friendship isn't based on spending'. My ex-best mate did that to me, just used to make me spend so much and at first i was up for it for like a year, my pay used to go all in about a week on just outings, cinemas and drinks. So i'v just calmed it down a bit. U should sit down and have a talk with them and explain your situation, if they're ur real friends they'll understand and wont pressure u until they know your sorted money-wise. Hope this helps :smile:

Reply 3

Genocidal

If they keep been like this even when you have talked with them they are obviously not real friends. Also you can just stand up to them if they don't like it too bad they will get over it.

Reply 4

Xeren

I know exactly what your going through. I have one friend in particular that is such a flake and will never do anything she doesn't want to do. She's dropped me so many times to hang out with with boyfriends and even work buddies that she didn't even like instead. I couldn't make it to her birthday cos I had work and she started moaning at me.

Something I would never do cos I see it as if someone can't/doesn't want to hang out with me I don't want to force them into it. Another time a friend who is goes home every weekend had a go at me cos I didn't want to spend the night keeping her company. I got so mad that I just said 'go make some other friends'. You just have to rise above it.

At the end of the day they aren't paying your bills. Let them moan. If they genuinely liked you they wouldn't care that you didn't getting drunk with them every weekend.