Depression Society MKIII

all these uni scenarios keep going through my head. i just don';t know what to apply for or when to apply and what risks to take. aghh

if I cut everything will finally go away. argh I should, I don't know, I'm sick of being in bed, if I do it I can get on with stuff, if I don't I'm stuck. why the **** is this so ******* hard.

Resit the urge, maybe try going on a short walk? Anything you can think of to distract you?

I'm so sorry guys, but could I have a little bit of support/advice?

I really do feel like I'm losing it. Last night when I was in bed, I literally became paralysed. I was trying to get to sleep and then a bright light flashed in my eyes and it was from nowhere in my room. Then I felt like I could hear people talking (there was nobody else in) and then like somebody was taking the sheets off me. I know I probably sound really damn weird now, but it felt so real last night and I hadn't taken any drugs/alcohol and I wasn't overly tired. I was just paralysed and I don't know why.

I am so on the verge of doing something 'stupid' (as everybody else likes to call it). Locked myself in the toilets at school today for over 2 hours. If was after an 'emergency meeting' to decide what they're actually going to do with me. I can't smile, and I can't think positively.

I've got to have a medical examination for the ******* police this week and I despise the thought of it. It will do no good anyway. And my teacher, the only person who's ever supported me, has decided to start ignoring me.

I brought 2 packets of sleeping pills today. So, that's 40. It, according to somebody elses experience, only takes 20 to make you unconcious and need hospitalisation, so I'm sure 40 will do it. Trying so hard not to, but I don't know what else to do.

You're not losing it. You're just under an incredible amount of stress at the moment.

Please get rid of the pills. You could easily end up waking up in hospital with your problems even worse.

I don't know what else to say but I just really hope you stop feeling like this and your life starts getting better.

Thanks for the reply and hug. There wouldn't be a chance of me waking up, in all honesty. I don't know what I want. I don't want to die in some ways, but I just want to escape and, as Radiohead put it, disappear completely.

Thanks for the reply and hug. There wouldn't be a chance of me waking up, in all honesty. I don't know what I want. I don't want to die in some ways, but I just want to escape and, as Radiohead put it, disappear completely.

sleep but I spent a good portion of the last few days sleeping. I'm just getting sick of it all you know? If I do it everything will be fine at least for a while, if I don't I'll just be in this same situation again very very soon.

Things will improve, honestly. You just have to remember that, things always improve. As someone said to me today, it's always darkest before the dawn. Is there anybody your could call and talk to, or maybe try samaritans to have someone to just listen to you?

No problem. I know the feeling. I would love to just disappear somehow... Maybe you should try and get away from things - do you have a friend or a relative somewhere you could stay with for a while?

Thanks guys. Think I'm going to give it the night before I decide to do anything or not. Can't really call phonelines as I have a silly phobia of speaking on phones

Would email my teacher but seeing as she's attempting to distance herself then I don't think I will.

Just want to scream or smash something.

Thanks guys. Think I'm going to give it the night before I decide to do anything or not. Can't really call phonelines as I have a silly phobia of speaking on phones

But if you find some alternative then you don't have to be in either situation again. Try something different, calling someone, going for a walk. Any distraction to help you clear your head and keep you busy until the urge passes.

Thanks guys. Think I'm going to give it the night before I decide to do anything or not. Can't really call phonelines as I have a silly phobia of speaking on phones

Would email my teacher but seeing as she's attempting to distance herself then I don't think I will.

Just want to scream or smash something.

Hi,
I just wanted to say, please get rid of those pills - chuck them out right now. I have overdosed before and it just makes things worse. It is notoriously difficult to kill yourself by overdosing because your body is designed to fight it. All that will happen is you will end up in A&E being forced to choke down charcoal paste, which tastes like **** and makes you throw up. You don't want that.
Do you have a keyworker? Or the number for your crisis team? Please, please call them. Or even just go to A&E and tell them what you have said here and they get somebody from the crisis team in to talk to you.

You could email the samaratans.



I've been like this for a long time, tried so many things and nothing works. I've decided to go for the get drunk approach instead.

If I call the crisis team or go to A&E then all they'll do is hospitalise me, which I don't want. I don't like all the attention and pressure they put on me, so I'm being discharged from the outpatients service tomorrow because I told them I'm alright.

You need someone available 24/7 to talk to. Please, flush those pills (I had to do this 2 weeks ago), you'll be so relieved you did later. It's not going to continue like this, things will pick up and then you'll look back on now and be so, so glad that you didn't 'do something stupid'.

I can't do it, I feel like I need them there 'just in case'. I'm sorry... I just don't want to get to a point where I'm so distressed and then have no pills and no way of escaping from it... maybe if i sleep tonight i'll feel better tomorrow.