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    The ****** up sleep patterns started again. I just cannot sleep and I can't revise coz I am so tired. This just isn't fair :cry:
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    (Original post by Loz17)
    The ****** up sleep patterns started again. I just cannot sleep and I can't revise coz I am so tired. This just isn't fair :cry:
    :hugs: Have you spoken to your doctor about it? There will be things that they can give you to help :console:
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    Even though I don't personally know anyone involved, hearing about the Cumbria shootings yesterday has made me pretty sad. It's just really horrible and I can't believe someone could do such a nasty thing. It also makes me feel stupid to be depressed when look at how the families of those victims must be suffering :sad:. And I'm staying round my cousins' house right now, and they just told me about a 16-year-old who got stabbed to death just round the corner from here :afraid:. And he lived on this road as well, and I saw lots of flowers and letters and stuff on the front of his house. Sometimes I just become too aware of the dangers of life, and it can become overbearing . Sometimes I just wish I could do something, but I feel so powerless. Still, I guess it's a bit of a wakeup call to realise how lucky I am to be alive right now, and how I should maybe make more of an effort to make the most of life.
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    (Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
    Even though I don't personally know anyone involved, hearing about the Cumbria shootings yesterday has made me pretty sad. It's just really horrible and I can't believe someone could do such a nasty thing. It also makes me feel stupid to be depressed when look at how the families of those victims must be suffering :sad:. And I'm staying round my cousins' house right now, and they just told me about a 16-year-old who got stabbed to death just round the corner from here :afraid:. And he lived on this road as well, and I saw lots of flowers and letters and stuff on the front of his house. Sometimes I just become too aware of the dangers of life, and it can become overbearing . Sometimes I just wish I could do something, but I feel so powerless. Still, I guess it's a bit of a wakeup call to realise how lucky I am to be alive right now, and how I should maybe make more of an effort to make the most of life.
    Ditto to this entire post really. :sad:

    Also, why does no one IRL seem to care or even know about it? I know I have a major 24 hour news channel addiction, but still...
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Ditto to this entire post really. :sad:

    Also, why does no one IRL seem to care or even know about it? I know I have a major 24 hour news channel addiction, but still...
    It's all very well taking note of some important news, but I guess it's hard to feel really sad about something that isn't really personal to you, especially if you can't even really do anything about it. And then some people are more sensitive than others as well. There are times sometimes when I worry about getting stabbed, shot or killed in a car crash, and these things seem to happen to anyone these days as well :erm:. But I guess there's no point in getting overly worried about it since I don't know the future, and just have to hope for the best, eh?
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    (Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
    It's all very well taking note of some important news, but I guess it's hard to feel really sad about something that isn't really personal to you, especially if you can't even really do anything about it. And then some people are more sensitive than others as well. There are times sometimes when I worry about getting stabbed, shot or killed in a car crash, and these things seem to happen to anyone these days as well :erm:. But I guess there's no point in getting overly worried about it since I don't know the future, and just have to hope for the best, eh?
    Yeah, but it's more that the ueber religious on Facebook haven't said anything when normally they would... I'll just assume most others don't watch 2+ hours of the news a day :teehee:

    And yeah, we just have to hope for the best...
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    So today was weird. Had a very restless night, and then I woke up at 9.20 and my appointment was 10.00 - so literally jumped up, sorted out everything I had to before the gardener came, and then ran practically all the way there. My dad was already there, on the brink of ringing me, he looked very smart actually. Amanda thought I wasn't going to show up :rofl: My dad was very baffled to why I was seeing a counsellor in the first place from what I told him over the phone. It was hard to come out and say some of things I had to, to my dad but I think once Amanda said some things, and I was incredibly awkward about a certain topic being brought up, it clicked for my dad and he started crying. It touched me how upset he was about everything, but at the same I felt so bad making him so upset and it was also very odd seeing him openly cry. I've only ever seen him on the brink of tears once ever before. I think Amanda was very grateful talking to him and apparently for the first time ever, I sounded as if I had a ''gameplan'' for how to tackle my mum.

    One of the weirdest hours of my life so far :moon:
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    (Original post by natty_d)
    So today was weird. Had a very restless night, and then I woke up at 9.20 and my appointment was 10.00 - so literally jumped up, sorted out everything I had to before the gardener came, and then ran practically all the way there. My dad was already there, on the brink of ringing me, he looked very smart actually. Amanda thought I wasn't going to show up :rofl: My dad was very baffled to why I was seeing a counsellor in the first place from what I told him over the phone. It was hard to come out and say some of things I had to, to my dad but I think once Amanda said some things, and I was incredibly awkward about a certain topic being brought up, it clicked for my dad and he started crying. It touched me how upset he was about everything, but at the same I felt so bad making him so upset and it was also very odd seeing him openly cry. I've only ever seen him on the brink of tears once ever before. I think Amanda was very grateful talking to him and apparently for the first time ever, I sounded as if I had a ''gameplan'' for how to tackle my mum.

    One of the weirdest hours of my life so far :moon:
    :hugs: It's great that you dad's so supportive and cares about you.

    How're you feeling apart from weird? :p:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: It's great that you dad's so supportive and cares about you.

    How're you feeling apart from weird? :p:
    I've done two past papers :awesome: But not enough revision yet :no: Having someone in the garden meant that I really couldn't concentrate because I had to keep checking on them.

    I want some Red Bull though :erm: I feel ok today, the sun really improves moods, I think

    How are you getting on? :hugs:
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    (Original post by natty_d)
    I've done two past papers :awesome: But not enough revision yet :no: Having someone in the garden meant that I really couldn't concentrate because I had to keep checking on them.

    I want some Red Bull though :erm: I feel ok today, the sun really improves moods, I think

    How are you getting on? :hugs:
    I can't concentrate either and am working so slowly, I don't think I'll ever finish this! To be honest, how close the rest of my exams are doesn't really register, I still feel like I have 7 weeks until my last one, but it's only 3... :cry:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    I can't concentrate either and am working so slowly, I don't think I'll ever finish this! To be honest, how close the rest of my exams are doesn't really register, I still feel like I have 7 weeks until my last one, but it's only 3... :cry:
    Same - I have two exams on Wednesday and I've barely touched my books. I think I may pull an all nighter :erm:
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    (Original post by Nothos)
    Right, everyone. We are going to make a depsoc meet work. I think it should be held in August sometime, when everyone will be free from uni/school/etc. I'm open to suggestions mind. Additionally, we need to decide a location. What do people think? London?

    Post ideas. I'll see if I can get a mod to make a thread about this somewhere where we can all access it but not have too many trolls show up...
    I think it's a great idea but I can't do summer, but I'm kind of shy and boring anyway so no one worry about that :p:


    Why don't you just have people post in that thread and then pm them the details once it's all sorted? I really don't think posting the details where anyone can access them is a good idea, although obviously no one should feel left out if they did want to turn up.
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    Okay, the stress of exams is hitting me hard now. I can't get out of my head how little I've done and how much I've messed up...
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    Why am I so tired all the time?!? I don't care about exams right now, I just want to sleep... I really want to just sleep all day, but I can't because I have to revise :cry: There are only 3 weeks left now, but the strain of that... I don't know how I'll get through them TBH.
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    :cry: I'm not sure how much more of feeling like this I can take. I just can't cope and nothing's going to change for ages because I'm not getting any help :cry:
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    Swum 35 laps today :yy: And then spent the afternoon chilling with my work mate who is awesome... Just got home.

    Work was... horrid. I dunno. Maybe it's the fact that it's stilted because we don't know everything/aren't experienced yet. Or that there's so many things to remember... I'm not sure how it went, honestly! On the one hand, everything went smoothly, and I only nearly got ********* once, because I took a glass into the kitchen dish wash :gasp: (lovely girl on the pot wash told me to get it out quickly though so the head chef didn't see, thank God!) but equally I really, really, really didn't like the waitressing and couldn't wait for it to end. I don't understand the system at all even though it's been explained several times! It's not even that complicated, I'm just a bit dim :gasp: We had a few colourful characters in who were insistent that they could buy alcohol even though we weren't selling - it was all on a ticket scheme. All old boys and all arguing the toss :rolleyes: Reminded me why I loved working with people my own age so much! However the team is just so good and my manager is amazing so I'm very reluctant to write it off immediately. Sigh. I dunno. I'm so glad I'm off tomorrow but very nervous about Saturday, working midday til 8pm. :cry:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Swum 35 laps today :yy: And then spent the afternoon chilling with my work mate who is awesome... Just got home.

    Work was... horrid. I dunno. Maybe it's the fact that it's stilted because we don't know everything/aren't experienced yet. Or that there's so many things to remember... I'm not sure how it went, honestly! On the one hand, everything went smoothly, and I only nearly got ********* once, because I took a glass into the kitchen dish wash :gasp: (lovely girl on the pot wash told me to get it out quickly though so the head chef didn't see, thank God!) but equally I really, really, really didn't like the waitressing and couldn't wait for it to end. I don't understand the system at all even though it's been explained several times! It's not even that complicated, I'm just a bit dim :gasp: We had a few colourful characters in who were insistent that they could buy alcohol even though we weren't selling - it was all on a ticket scheme. All old boys and all arguing the toss :rolleyes: Reminded me why I loved working with people my own age so much! However the team is just so good and my manager is amazing so I'm very reluctant to write it off immediately. Sigh. I dunno. I'm so glad I'm off tomorrow but very nervous about Saturday, working midday til 8pm. :cry:
    You've only just started there so don't worry about it, everyone makes mistakes and I'm sure you'll pick up the rules pretty quick. A new job is always confusing at first, but you said before how you used to work behind a bar (I think...?) so, although obviously it's not exactly the same, you'll totally get it.

    Know what you mean about waiting tables, I used to do that a lot and hated it but even that you'll get the hang of so quickly. I always found that old people were the best because they were usually more friendly and also more generous tip-wise


    35laps is really good, well done.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    You've only just started there so don't worry about it, everyone makes mistakes and I'm sure you'll pick up the rules pretty quick. A new job is always confusing at first, but you said before how you used to work behind a bar (I think...?) so, although obviously it's not exactly the same, you'll totally get it.

    Know what you mean about waiting tables, I used to do that a lot and hated it but even that you'll get the hang of so quickly. I always found that old people were the best because they were usually more friendly and also more generous tip-wise


    35laps is really good, well done.
    I don't get to keep tips I'm so wary of getting shouted at... This time last year I'd probably have been able to take it, but over the last few months since Dad went, I've been having panic attacks at the slightest shouty argument and I'd rather that didn't happen at work! :o:
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    I'm still having nightmares every morning, but this morning's one continued everytime I fell back asleep :sad:

    I don't even know why I'm having nightmares now. It's just adding to me not wanting to go to sleep and it's not like I'm on any medication of any sort. :erm:
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    *New poster!* :o:

    Today was the second time I went to my GP about my depression. The first time he referred me to a 'child' psychologist (she wasn't much help) but lately things had gotten a lot worse so I went back to him.

    Here's how it went...

    Dr H: So tell me about how you've been feeling lately.
    Me: Um, well... Really really low... and I... just feel...
    *Nokia ring tone*
    Dr H: Oh! Sorry, one moment please *pulls phone out of pocket and answers* Oh, Hi! Yes... Great!... Yes... Yes...
    Me:
    *five minuets later*
    Dr H: At what time...? 9:00--right! Well, hang on... Let me get her whilst I'm on the phone to you! *Gets up and leaves the room*
    Me: :sigh:
 
 
 
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