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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Her funeral is 3 days before her birthday.

    And the ******* Mail has ****** up the article about her death - says it's a peanut allergy, and has some key facts about her wrong. Pricks.
    :hugs: I can't offer anything but hugs, so have lots of hugs: :hugs: :jumphug: :console: :grouphugs: :hugs: :console: :jumphug: :grouphugs: :console: :grouphugs: :hugs: :console:
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    (Original post by Saffie)
    I just found the article. It implies she studied medicine hmm. I'm sorry to hear about it though.

    I'm totally fed up. All I have on the horizon is revision and exams.
    Next week is the first week I wont have any appointments in months. I dont know if thats good or bad.
    She had managed to get into medicine, I think, down at Brighton. But she was studying BioMed last year, and hadn't started the Med course yet.

    She worked in the care home because she enjoyed it, not just to 'fund her medical degree'.

    She would never, ever, ever have been careless about her allergies. Ever.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    She had managed to get into medicine, I think, down at Brighton. But she was studying BioMed last year, and hadn't started the Med course yet.

    She worked in the care home because she enjoyed it, not just to 'fund her medical degree'.

    She would never, ever, ever have been careless about her allergies. Ever.
    :hugs: People call it the Daily Fail for a reason, don't let their rubbish reporting get to you. What matters is you and the people who cared about her, not those who read one newspaper.
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    I feel. Odd. :/
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    I feel. Odd. :/
    :jumphug:
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    I feel numb today =( Lonely and bored with myself. They're inappropriate, I know I'm best with just counselling (whenever I get that ¬.¬), but I wish the doctor would've just given me meds. I don't really know what to do with myself right now. Hmmm.

    I'm SHing again too. I had to see a nurse yesterday and refused to take off this sort of bandage thing I put on my arm to cover up the scars. Heh, she asked if I was injecting...hah. I have to stop though 'cause I'll be seeing my boyfriend soon and he can't know.

    Jesus, when the hell is this all gonna stop. Just, ffs, it's not fair, I don't want to deal with this and feel like this. I just want a little bit of peace, why the hell is that too god damn much to ask for.
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    (Original post by Frosties1)
    I feel numb today =( Lonely and bored with myself. They're inappropriate, I know I'm best with just counselling (whenever I get that ¬.¬), but I wish the doctor would've just given me meds. I don't really know what to do with myself right now. Hmmm.

    I'm SHing again too. I had to see a nurse yesterday and refused to take off this sort of bandage thing I put on my arm to cover up the scars. Heh, she asked if I was injecting...hah. I have to stop though 'cause I'll be seeing my boyfriend soon and he can't know.

    Jesus, when the hell is this all gonna stop. Just, ffs, it's not fair, I don't want to deal with this and feel like this. I just want a little bit of peace, why the hell is that too god damn much to ask for.
    :hugs: Have you had counselling before or are you still on a waiting list?
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    Why am I sitting exams? I can't cope with them, I really, really can't. I've been crying for about an hour now because of my last exam. I shouldn't have continued at school.
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: Have you had counselling before or are you still on a waiting list?
    Thanks I appreciate the response

    I've had counselling before and it was actually a very good experience, but I finished that this time last year when I left my first college because I was done there after exams. It ended just as she was starting to weave everything I'd said over the past few months together and come to conclusions too, which was a shame :o: I went to the GP Thursday last week and I'm on the waiting list. I hope it proves as positive an experience as last time.
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Why am I sitting exams? I can't cope with them, I really, really can't. I've been crying for about an hour now because of my last exam. I shouldn't have continued at school.
    I know the feeling. After a few exams last year I felt utterly defeated and wanted to throw the towel in. I was just exhausted and thought I'd failed. My advice is just to forget the exams gone and keep going. Just do your best and don't apply pressure on yourself to give anymore then you can. No matter what the results, at this stage, it's far better to just keep going and finish them all then give in. It'll all be ok
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    Fed up :cry:
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    I can't tell whether the depression has come back harder than ever, whether it's because I'm grieving or whether it's a combination of both, but I feel worse than I have ever done tonight.

    If I'd had another packet of paracetamol in my bag, I think I would have taken all of them.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    I can't tell whether the depression has come back harder than ever, whether it's because I'm grieving or whether it's a combination of both, but I feel worse than I have ever done tonight.

    If I'd had another packet of paracetamol in my bag, I think I would have taken all of them.
    :hugs: :console: :jumphugs: :grouphugs:

    Is there anyone you can go and talk to/sit with if you feel like that again?
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    I can't tell whether the depression has come back harder than ever, whether it's because I'm grieving or whether it's a combination of both, but I feel worse than I have ever done tonight.

    If I'd had another packet of paracetamol in my bag, I think I would have taken all of them.
    :console: Sorry for your loss. I don't really know how to deal with grief, but is there anyone you could maybe speak to about things? :hugs:
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    This afternoon, I have my first driving lesson since last year :woo:. I'm gonna try telling myself that I'm gonna be good this time, and hopefully that'll work? I just really want to do this, I'm so fed up of being a failure in everything and being so crappy. Lots of my peers are already driving, so I'm determined to join em :yep:
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    (Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
    :console: Sorry for your loss. I don't really know how to deal with grief, but is there anyone you could maybe speak to about things? :hugs:
    I tried speaking to the stars, so that I could speak to her again. It just made me feel... like a five year old. :o:

    I dunno. I clam up around people. I tend to look like someone's slapped me around the face multiple times but really my mind is just completely blank inside.
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    Failed my ******* course. :cry:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Failed my ******* course. :cry:
    :zomg: Seriously? Sorry :console:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Failed my ******* course. :cry:
    :hugs: There are still other options, and you'll do great once you crush depression and you can! Just focus on taking it easy now :console:

    ---

    Exams are over, I await my crappy grades. I hope this means that my panic attacks will stop, but recently I've been getting so panicky in cars :erm:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Failed my ******* course. :cry:
    :hugs: I'm sorry to hear that. I know it might seem like a big deal or that it means whatever about you, but it doesn't. Whatever you want to do there will be ways of doing it, it might be roundabout but it should be possible.



    ergh, burst into tears in the city centre today then ended up hiding in a toilet until I could stop crying and get back to my room. ******* great. :rolleyes:
 
 
 
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