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    (Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
    Thanks :hugs:. Although I know there are things about me that need fixing, I just sometimes think my problems are kinda stupid and worthless, and I just feel really embarrassed and shy at the thought of talking about them to someone. Telling my doctor the basics was hard enough as well . Lol, I just need to man up, eh? :o:

    Well done on ridding your panic attack by the way
    :hugs: I think it's always that way, but you just have to try and be brave, let them steer the conversation and be honest. Your problems aren't stupid and worthless, they're problems for you and so need fixing. :console:

    Thanks haha. I haven't felt this relaxed in months, maybe years. :dontknow: Still have the unexplained crying, but at least I'm calm.
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    Got my own room now, which is better than sleeping on the sofa, but the downside is it's so much easier to self-harm. Wich I had some ******* willpower.
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    Well I feel like crap today :sad:
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    :ditto:
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    :hugs: to everyone.

    I've just been lying in bed on my computer all morning, even too lazy to go get breakfast. Food is just getting annoying now though, I always stay damn skinny whether I eat a whole barnful of horses or eat nothing at all

    I'm actually supposed to be in school right now as well , but I really can't be arsed, I often feel like **** there (more so than I do at home), and I probably won't even be coming back next year anyway so what's the point? :dontknow: May end up just bunking these last couples of weeks tbh. Hmm, we'll see :beard:
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    (Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
    :hugs: to everyone.

    I've just been lying in bed on my computer all morning, even too lazy to go get breakfast. Food is just getting annoying now though, I always stay damn skinny whether I eat a whole barnful of horses or eat nothing at all

    I'm actually supposed to be in school right now as well , but I really can't be arsed, I often feel like **** there (more so than I do at home), and I probably won't even be coming back next year anyway so what's the point? :dontknow: May end up just bunking these last couples of weeks tbh. Hmm, we'll see :beard:
    hey how are you?
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    Gotta phone tomorrow morning to get an appointment for Friday :sigh:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Gotta phone tomorrow morning to get an appointment for Friday :sigh:
    :hugs: It's a step in the right direction, after that the steps will get smaller and more manageable. :console: It could really help you.
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    (Original post by mathperson)
    hey how are you?
    Hi, I'm just chilling out at home, feeling OK right now, thanks .

    How are you? I've actually not seen you around here for ages :beard:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: It's a step in the right direction, after that the steps will get smaller and more manageable. :console: It could really help you.
    I hope so :hugs:

    I feel awful because the ex has posted on FB that he's losing control again - he's attempted suicide and had SI problems before, I can't bear the thought that I might have triggered him :sad:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    I hope so :hugs:

    I feel awful because the ex has posted on FB that he's losing control again - he's attempted suicide and had SI problems before, I can't bear the thought that I might have triggered him :sad:
    :hugs: You don't know that you triggered him at all, so many things play into it. Just focus on trying to get yourself better, that's all you can do right now and it's important that you do :console:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: You don't know that you triggered him at all, so many things play into it. Just focus on trying to get yourself better, that's all you can do right now and it's important that you do :console:
    Mmm, it feels like I did. I'd love to sit and have a chat with him but honestly I don't think it'd make any difference and it'd just prolong both our agonies. I don't want him to be upset. I just want to tell him that everything will be ok, and that it's all being sorted, and that we should be friends still because I can't honestly imagine my life without him in there somewhere. :o:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Mmm, it feels like I did. I'd love to sit and have a chat with him but honestly I don't think it'd make any difference and it'd just prolong both our agonies. I don't want him to be upset. I just want to tell him that everything will be ok, and that it's all being sorted, and that we should be friends still because I can't honestly imagine my life without him in there somewhere. :o:
    :hugs: Why not tell him that? :console:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: Why not tell him that? :console:
    Maybe one day I will.
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    I'm getting panicky again. :erm: Here's hoping that meditation works again :erm:
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    Okay, I was feeling better but then my parents pressed me about driving again. I tried to call my driving instructor, but the number is no longer recognised. I have her house number, but would rather wait until tomorrow to call because she won't want to deal with work now and at any rate her husband will be home and I hate calling people especially when I don't know them. Now there's my brother's **** music blaring, my dad accidentally chucked out my ear plugs and replaced them with ones that don't work and it's making me really panicky and I'm just completely freaking out. I can still hear the drum beat over my music and that sound just makes me really anxious...
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    My boyfriend broke up with me.
    I feel hollow, and empty.
    I keep thinking about all the amazing times we had together, the cute words we exchanged, deep conversations.
    I can't stop crying. I don't want a future with him not in it.
    I can't do this. I don't know what to do with myself.
    I miss him. I miss him so, so much.
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    (Original post by Frosties1)
    My boyfriend broke up with me.
    I feel hollow, and empty.
    I keep thinking about all the amazing times we had together, the cute words we exchanged, deep conversations.
    I can't stop crying. I don't want a future with him not in it.
    I can't do this. I don't know what to do with myself.
    I miss him. I miss him so, so much.
    :hugs: That feeling will fade and you'll be able to look back fondly again :console:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: That feeling will fade and you'll be able to look back fondly again :console:
    It ended so abruptly and unjustly. It didn't fizzle out, me and him were just robbed.
    I don't want to get over him, I don't want to feel better and heal, I just want to be back with him.
    I can't make sense of it all and I can't let go. I don't want to let go. I love him. He's the guy I want to be with for as far into the future as I can see. I want his words, his conversation, his smiles. I want to make him happy and be the person he confides in. I so desperately want him. No one else.
    Everytime I think about all the good times my heart just drops. Reality sets in and it's so incredibly painful.
    I'm crying now, I've been crying since I got home at 3ish. I wish he'd just call. I miss his voice. God how I miss his voice.
    Life before him wasn't nearly as good as it was with him, I can't imagine my future without him. It seems so bleak.
    Why won't he just come back.
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    (Original post by Frosties1)
    It ended so abruptly and unjustly. It didn't fizzle out, me and him were just robbed.
    I don't want to get over him, I don't want to feel better and heal, I just want to be back with him.
    I can't make sense of it all and I can't let go. I don't want to let go. I love him. He's the guy I want to be with for as far into the future as I can see. I want his words, his conversation, his smiles. I want to make him happy and be the person he confides in. I so desperately want him. No one else.
    Everytime I think about all the good times my heart just drops. Reality sets in and it's so incredibly painful.
    I'm crying now, I've been crying since I got home at 3ish. I wish he'd just call. I miss his voice. God how I miss his voice.
    Life before him wasn't nearly as good as it was with him, I can't imagine my future without him. It seems so bleak.
    Why won't he just come back.
    :hugs: I can't offer much more than hugs :console: I know that you don't want to move on but you will start feeling better soon :jumphug:
 
 
 
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