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    Help I stopped taking citalopram about 4 weeks ago.... I dunno if I should retake them again?!
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    (Original post by Superstar6318)
    Help I stopped taking citalopram about 4 weeks ago.... I dunno if I should retake them again?!
    Why did you stop taking it?
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    Right, that is it. I am fed up of living life like this. No more excuses, no more going soft on myself. I don't care if all I want to do is curl up in bed with back-to-back Buffy episodes, I am going to bloody well do some of what I had planned for today and I will get up earlier and I will start doing some work. I'm fed up of just existing. I don't give a damn that every part of me thinks its too tired to do work, I'm going to finish this work and then I will be lazy. I am not going to let depression define me.
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    (Original post by Kaaatieee)
    i hate being single and ive been single for 5 months, the only attention i get is from older guys or guys say they like me then stop talkin to me before i even meet them i just feel like ive given up on relationships when all i need is a guy who likes me, and cuddles me and tell me everything is fine...but i cant see that happening, ever
    I feel pretty much the exact same, except I've been single for well over 2 years now, and it fricking sucks :hugs:
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    Getting stressed about the future. I have less than two months til I have to leave my current flat and after that I don't know where to live or who with. I have practically no money, waiting to see if I get benefits or not. I could really do with not having all this uncertainty at the moment.
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    (Original post by superwolf)
    Getting stressed about the future. I have less than two months til I have to leave my current flat and after that I don't know where to live or who with. I have practically no money, waiting to see if I get benefits or not. I could really do with not having all this uncertainty at the moment.
    Gah that sucks, benefits are not fun to obtain, they make you feel like a criminal.






    Dark evening, full of guilt thanks to my brother. and ts3 had really cheered me up!
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    Oh. What a ****** day.

    My friend's nan died, so she's upset, so I've been trying to console her. And one of the guys I vaguely knew from around town (bonus of a small town, you tend to get to know everyone) hung himself last night. So more friend consoling. Now I feel sad :sad:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Oh. What a ****** day.

    My friend's nan died, so she's upset, so I've been trying to console her. And one of the guys I vaguely knew from around town (bonus of a small town, you tend to get to know everyone) hung himself last night. So more friend consoling. Now I feel sad :sad:
    :hugs:
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    (Original post by superwolf)
    :hugs:
    Thanks... I'm strangely unbothered by it. I mean. He was younger than me - and reading the messages from his friends asking where he is and why he's not picking up his phone on FaceBook are breaking my heart - but I know why he did it. And I don't blame him. My ease with this is scary; it's like I've got past the justification of killing myself and moved on to why other people kill themselves and can't condemn either action any more.

    My friend is very upset, I think it's got to her as her boyfriend is bipolar and regularly threatens to kill himself and has ODed before, she's terrified of losing him. When I told her (she's the only one apart from R who knows about my OD) that I'd ODed she went ballistic and quite rightly pointed out what a divhead I was (in less polite language)... She sent me a text saying that it's not fair, now she's going to worry more about the both of us. *****. :o:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Thanks... I'm strangely unbothered by it. I mean. He was younger than me - and reading the messages from his friends asking where he is and why he's not picking up his phone on FaceBook are breaking my heart - but I know why he did it. And I don't blame him. My ease with this is scary; it's like I've got past the justification of killing myself and moved on to why other people kill themselves and can't condemn either action any more.

    My friend is very upset, I think it's got to her as her boyfriend is bipolar and regularly threatens to kill himself and has ODed before, she's terrified of losing him. When I told her (she's the only one apart from R who knows about my OD) that I'd ODed she went ballistic and quite rightly pointed out what a divhead I was (in less polite language)... She sent me a text saying that it's not fair, now she's going to worry more about the both of us. *****. :o:
    I know what you mean, whenever I read about someone killing themselves in the news I always think they must be somehow smarter than me for just going ahead and doing it. I never blame them cos it seems like the right thing to do.

    Your poor friend, sounds like her boyfriend's a bit of an ******** for acting like that. Try not to feel bad about her worrying about you though, it's only natural. Is there anyone else you'd feel comfortable telling, that might make her feel like there's a bit less pressure on her.
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    (Original post by superwolf)
    I know what you mean, whenever I read about someone killing themselves in the news I always think they must be somehow smarter than me for just going ahead and doing it. I never blame them cos it seems like the right thing to do.

    Your poor friend, sounds like her boyfriend's a bit of an ******** for acting like that. Try not to feel bad about her worrying about you though, it's only natural. Is there anyone else you'd feel comfortable telling, that might make her feel like there's a bit less pressure on her.
    Yes, I think that's it. My friend who died of an allergic reaction a month ago - I think of that and I think of a wasted life. I'm sitting here thinking 'Yeah, it was his time... I'm glad he managed to get it right' and wondering what the **** is wrong with me. I think that I'm trying to justify that one day it'll be 'my time'. :o:

    He is, tbh, he's one of these stereotypes, posts on FB twice a day about how he's so depressed, has a blog that he openly publicizes which has posts about his 'self harm' (not sounding mean, or trying to demean him, but honest to God, I've seen more self harm on a 3 year old) and generally flips between loving and a very nice guy and an utter twunt very quickly, taking it all out on her. I don't think she knows she's the only person I told... I don't think it'd help her to share the burden. The knowledge is there. I've told her that whenever, I'll keep my phone on and she's to ring at any time, I'll keep it on vibrate at work tomorrow and make an excuse if she wants me when I'm in, it's all good. Screw my problems, I need to be there for my friends now.

    It sure would be nice to have a fortnight where someone didn't die.
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    I am trying to decide if to wait a year and go to uni, or if to apply to join the Navy as an officer. But then my depression would come up in the medical.. which could tits things up. Ah ****, I don't know what to do.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    It sure would be nice to have a fortnight where someone didn't die.
    God you're having a **** time :jumphug: I hope and pray things improve for you sweetheart. :console:

    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    I am trying to decide if to wait a year and go to uni, or if to apply to join the Navy as an officer. But then my depression would come up in the medical.. which could tits things up. Ah ****, I don't know what to do.
    My dad used to be in the Navy (which was when he said he was depressed so I'm not sure how great an atmosphere it was for him). He used to say that it was great when you're free and single, but as soon as you have a family, it's horrible having to be away from them all the time. There is no denying that he did enjoy it before that and got loads of experience etc.

    However, from a quick Google it looks as though you have to have been clear of your depression for a certain number of years, which makes sense I guess :dontknow:

    Sorry, my comment is probably quite biased as I obviously I wasn't the biggest fan of him being in the Navy. Apart from when he brought back sweets from various places :teehee:
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    Technically I have not been diagnosed with anything as of yet. Or does just going to the doctors saying your depressed count? Might have to ring up and ask.
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    Technically I have not been diagnosed with anything as of yet. Or does just going to the doctors saying your depressed count? Might have to ring up and ask.
    I think I've found the official guidelines here. Scroll down to "Psychiatric disorders".

    It depends on what your doctor wrote down I guess. But you have to think about what is right for you and, should you join the Navy, whether you'd be putting other people at risk as well as yourself. You can always join after uni, after getting help :hugs:

    EDIT: You'd also need to carry on the chemo and have the tumour "successfully treated" and "regarded as cured". Is that a good enough incentive? :puppyeyes:

    EDIT 2: Okay, I've almost finished reading the guidelines. How does anyone ever get into the armed forces? I'm struggling to think of a great number of people who aren't limited by something on there :erm:
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    I just need too see a future, the idea of years more education followed by then having to search for a job is what gets me down, along with my mum. Without those, I wouldn't say I would be fine, but hell I would be soo much better.

    I knew about the chemo, just couldn't find anything detailed about psychiatric stuff, but meh.. looks like I have shot myself in the foot with that. Absolutely ******* awesome.
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    I just need too see a future, the idea of years more education followed by then having to search for a job is what gets me down, along with my mum. Without those, I wouldn't say I would be fine, but hell I would be soo much better.

    I knew about the chemo, just couldn't find anything detailed about psychiatric stuff, but meh.. looks like I have shot myself in the foot with that. Absolutely ******* awesome.
    :hugs: After 3 years at uni you might be all better, you're getting help now after all. Plus, the armed forces have graduate schemes that can help.

    Oh, and uni or Navy means you can get away from your Mum and do your problems with the future lie with this or with your depression? I think if it work on getting help for that, you'll be better able to work on what you want for the future. :console:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: After 3 years at uni you might be all better, you're getting help now after all. Plus, the armed forces have graduate schemes that can help.

    Oh, and uni or Navy means you can get away from your Mum and do your problems with the future lie with this or with your depression? I think if it work on getting help for that, you'll be better able to work on what you want for the future. :console:
    I just can't take education anymore, I could list the reasons but it would become an essay. If I go to uni I will probably end up messing up and it will be £30k down the drain.

    This Navy thing I havn't just thought up, its been a thing I have thought about for a few years, but now my option of that is gone. Ah well, nothing seems to go for me.

    ---

    Went to see the doctor today, he didn't convince me, I did agree however to still have scans, and told him I want a new doctor who is not a prick.
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    I just need too see a future, the idea of years more education followed by then having to search for a job is what gets me down, along with my mum. Without those, I wouldn't say I would be fine, but hell I would be soo much better.

    I knew about the chemo, just couldn't find anything detailed about psychiatric stuff, but meh.. looks like I have shot myself in the foot with that. Absolutely ******* awesome.
    You could go to uni and whilst there do that university officer training corps thing. It'd give you an idea about the armed forces yet at the same time you'd be getting qualifications if you do change your mind. I think they're a little less strict with the entry requirements too though I've never done it so can't say exactly.
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    I just can't take education anymore, I could list the reasons but it would become an essay. If I go to uni I will probably end up messing up and it will be £30k down the drain.

    This Navy thing I havn't just thought up, its been a thing I have thought about for a few years, but now my option of that is gone. Ah well, nothing seems to go for me.

    ---

    Went to see the doctor today, he didn't convince me, I did agree however to still have scans, and told him I want a new doctor who is not a prick.
    They have apprenticeships too. There are loads of options that you can look at :hugs: When are you hoping to go to uni? If you're applying for entry for next year (I think that's what you said?) then why not apply anyway and if you get offers see if you're healthy enough to go nearer the time it starts. A year is a long time in which you could make loads of progress. :yep:
 
 
 
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