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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    5ft6. I didn't realise how much I'd lost recently - with the whole Poppy thing - until I weighed myself about a week ago. Sigh. Stupid ****** up mind.
    :hugs: Your BMI (if I remembered your weight properly) is dead on the perfect weight for your weight. Of course BMI is a load of balls. So IMO you really don't need to lose any more. Grief and depression can cause weight loss :hugs: Try not to focus on it, your mind is not ****** up.
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: Your BMI (if I remembered your weight properly) is dead on the perfect weight for your weight. Of course BMI is a load of balls. So IMO you really don't need to lose any more. Grief and depression can cause weight loss :hugs: Try not to focus on it, your mind is not ****** up.
    Mmm. I think it goes deeper than that... I think some worrying things sometimes. (Weight related, not just the 'oh god I could totally use x to kill myself with right now') Sigh. I'm now worried what my Dad will say when he gets home; I was nearly a stone heavier when he left.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Mmm. I think it goes deeper than that... I think some worrying things sometimes. (Weight related, not just the 'oh god I could totally use x to kill myself with right now') Sigh. I'm now worried what my Dad will say when he gets home; I was nearly a stone heavier when he left.
    :hugs: When are you next seeing the GP? It might be worth mentioning that so that they can make sure you get some talking therapy to support you. :console:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: Is it worth you trying to find a new psychiatrist? Even just to have someone to sort out talking therapy or something? :console:
    I dunno what's happening. Was kind of seeing a psychologist who was meant to do talking stuff with me, well we did speak a fair bit but I'm not sure how it was meant to help. New psychiatrist...maybe, don't really like any of them and I've seen a lot, can't see what a new one would do either.



    And kiss_me_now9, if your friends are saying that then they're probably right. It's not even about how big you are or how much you weigh, it's how healthy you are. Some really skinny girls eat nothing but junk and never do any exercise, which is still pretty bad for their bodies. If you're exercising and eating ok then that's much better no matter what size you are. I have no idea what size you are but your friends are probably right, even if you don't see it. 5'6 is taller than average for a girl as well.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    I dunno what's happening. Was kind of seeing a psychologist who was meant to do talking stuff with me, well we did speak a fair bit but I'm not sure how it was meant to help. New psychiatrist...maybe, don't really like any of them and I've seen a lot, can't see what a new one would do either.



    And kiss_me_now9, if your friends are saying that then they're probably right. It's not even about how big you are or how much you weigh, it's how healthy you are. Some really skinny girls eat nothing but junk and never do any exercise, which is still pretty bad for their bodies. If you're exercising and eating ok then that's much better no matter what size you are. I have no idea what size you are but your friends are probably right, even if you don't see it. 5'6 is taller than average for a girl as well.
    :hugs: Just having a psychiatrist with a personality that meshes better with yours might make things easier.
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    In a ****, **** mood.
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    Bloody great. The 3 'S's are filling my head now - suicide, self harm and starvation. **** day.
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Bloody great. The 3 'S's are filling my head now - suicide, self harm and starvation. **** day.
    :hugs: is there anything you can do to take your mind off things?

    I just spent 2 hours reading about how to train a dog properly, good for distraction from my thoughts.



    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: Just having a psychiatrist with a personality that meshes better with yours might make things easier.
    The one before the current one was pretty awesome, we really got along she was actually "cool" :p: but again, didn't exactly do anything which helped so kind of pointless.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    :hugs: is there anything you can do to take your mind off things?

    I just spent 2 hours reading about how to train a dog properly, good for distraction from my thoughts.





    The one before the current one was pretty awesome, we really got along she was actually "cool" :p: but again, didn't exactly do anything which helped so kind of pointless.
    I dunno, the thoughts are calming down after a few minutes of sticking my head out of the window to listen to the rain and look at the sky (normally calms me down) but still feel like ****.

    Haha, you an expert in dog training now then?
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    I dunno, the thoughts are calming down after a few minutes of sticking my head out of the window to listen to the rain and look at the sky (normally calms me down) but still feel like ****.

    Haha, you an expert in dog training now then?
    Walks in the pouring rain tend to be helpful I find, it's pretty fun getting soaking wet and not giving a damn. Though probably a bit late to be going for a walk.

    And btw, you should order a few pairs of earphones, if you're anything like me at getting through them then cheap spares are always handy. I'm guessing because it's late you can't watch anything online? You could try playing online games or the sims - take your rage out on killing sims rather than anything else.


    More of an expert than most people probably. :p: I would love to get a dog but can't right now, so it's nice to read about and then when I eventually get one I'll train it properly.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Walks in the pouring rain tend to be helpful I find, it's pretty fun getting soaking wet and not giving a damn. Though probably a bit late to be going for a walk.

    And btw, you should order a few pairs of earphones, if you're anything like me at getting through them then cheap spares are always handy. I'm guessing because it's late you can't watch anything online? You could try playing online games or the sims - take your rage out on killing sims rather than anything else.


    More of an expert than most people probably. :p: I would love to get a dog but can't right now, so it's nice to read about and then when I eventually get one I'll train it properly.
    Yeah. Well, a bit early really. Might go for one if and when my headphones arrive.

    I've already ordered them and can't really afford to get more. I do have a pair of sports ones but the sound quality is abysmal with them. I've nicked my brother's ones too but they're not in-ear ones so you can't turn up the volume and shut the world off. I can watch stuff with subtitles like some stuff on Hulu but in about 2 hours I can make as much noise as I want haha.

    I'm feeling better now though :yep:

    :hugs: Have you got dogs at home?
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Yeah. Well, a bit early really. Might go for one if and when my headphones arrive.

    I've already ordered them and can't really afford to get more. I do have a pair of sports ones but the sound quality is abysmal with them. I've nicked my brother's ones too but they're not in-ear ones so you can't turn up the volume and shut the world off. I can watch stuff with subtitles like some stuff on Hulu but in about 2 hours I can make as much noise as I want haha.

    I'm feeling better now though :yep:

    :hugs: Have you got dogs at home?
    Ah fair enough. You can get pairs for £1 on ebay...though yes the sound quality is pretty bad. Those big ones that go over your head and completely block your ear can sometimes give pretty good quality as well as blocking out outside noise - and they're harder to break! Youtube has a subtitles thing on some videos but I found it doesn't tend to understand British accents :mmm: Glad to hear you're feeling better now, you planning on sleeping?

    Nope no dogs. I had 2 as well as many cats when I was growing up, but nothing now. Really miss them as I seem to get on much better with dogs and cats than people. :p:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Mmm. I dunno. I tend to go in fits and burst of exercise and eating normally to not really eating - I rarely maintain the same routine weekly. This week I'll be swimming three times but next week I may only make it to the pool once. The more I look at that photo, the more I'm convincing myself it's a camera trick
    you look absolutely stunning in those pics, that dress looks amazing. I know what you mean with food,I think its long term sense to keep tabs on your food otherwise you may gain all the weight you lost with slack habits over a year or so(like I did). Swimming ftw. I've been addicted to it of recent :coma:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: When are you next seeing the GP? It might be worth mentioning that so that they can make sure you get some talking therapy to support you. :console:
    Two weeks. Meh. Cba.

    Feeling crap. I want to go swimming and just lose myself in the water, forget my thoughts and push myself to do something positive, but that means walking down, paying money that I don't really have, probably getting rained on... Sigh.

    (Original post by sauce)
    you look absolutely stunning in those pics, that dress looks amazing. I know what you mean with food,I think its long term sense to keep tabs on your food otherwise you may gain all the weight you lost with slack habits over a year or so(like I did). Swimming ftw. I've been addicted to it of recent
    Same Love it! Thanks... I'm not sure I agree though.
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    Thought I'd write a positive post for once. I feel much better these days. I never thought it was possible!

    I dont remember a summer of feeling okay so its new to me. I'm keeping really busy, currently painting my room. I'm scared if I stop doing things the depression will come back. But hey, this is quite productive.

    I hope everybody that posts here isn't feeling too bad. Things do definitely get better.
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    Ah I feel crap, and just want everyone and everything to **** off and leave me in my own little world
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    Feeling like a bit of a lump at the minute. It's like I want to do something useful or whatever, but just don't even know where to start anymore. Almost like everything scares me in some way.
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    Finally went to see Inception, totally forgot suicide is a strong theme in it :facepalm2:. Came out with the ends of my hair wet with sweat, feeling sick and a bit short of breathe. I guess that is the closest to a panic attack I have been. But yeah.. brilliant film.
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    Finally went to see Inception, totally forgot suicide is a strong theme in it :facepalm2:. Came out with the ends of my hair wet with sweat, feeling sick and a bit short of breathe. I guess that is the closest to a panic attack I have been. But yeah.. brilliant film.
    I would have liked to have been informed of that beforehand, took me by surprise too. Ruined the film for me :hugs:
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    Finally went to see Inception, totally forgot suicide is a strong theme in it :facepalm2:. Came out with the ends of my hair wet with sweat, feeling sick and a bit short of breathe. I guess that is the closest to a panic attack I have been. But yeah.. brilliant film.
    :hugs: I want to see that, everyone says it's good didn't realise it was focused on suicide...
 
 
 
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