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    I have a hangover and the miserable weather has made me unhappy. I keep thinking about someone I lost and I guess its pointless because some things just arent fair and dont make sense. I miss her.
    I've spent most of today lying in bed doing nothing. Bleh.
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    hey.

    ergh, never did call the psychiatrist in the end. Just tried not to mention anything connected with calling until 6pm and I'm now free all weekend. Perhaps not a great idea, feel ****. Got the modules I wanted for uni next year which is annoying as now I have even less excuse not to do the work.

    Does anyone else have real problems concentrating on stuff? On tsr anything longer than 4 lines I have to highlight it one bit at a time and still generally give up, or just read the beginning and end. Newspaper articles are out of the question - I've been skim reading daily mail articles () for the past few months, that's it, can't even manage all of those. How the **** am I meant to read academic books and articles?
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    hey.

    ergh, never did call the psychiatrist in the end. Just tried not to mention anything connected with calling until 6pm and I'm now free all weekend. Perhaps not a great idea, feel ****. Got the modules I wanted for uni next year which is annoying as now I have even less excuse not to do the work.

    Does anyone else have real problems concentrating on stuff? On tsr anything longer than 4 lines I have to highlight it one bit at a time and still generally give up, or just read the beginning and end. Newspaper articles are out of the question - I've been skim reading daily mail articles () for the past few months, that's it, can't even manage all of those. How the **** am I meant to read academic books and articles?
    Ugh can totally relate to this. Seriously How am I going to cope in September?!
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    hey.

    ergh, never did call the psychiatrist in the end. Just tried not to mention anything connected with calling until 6pm and I'm now free all weekend. Perhaps not a great idea, feel ****. Got the modules I wanted for uni next year which is annoying as now I have even less excuse not to do the work.

    Does anyone else have real problems concentrating on stuff? On tsr anything longer than 4 lines I have to highlight it one bit at a time and still generally give up, or just read the beginning and end. Newspaper articles are out of the question - I've been skim reading daily mail articles () for the past few months, that's it, can't even manage all of those. How the **** am I meant to read academic books and articles?
    :hugs: Maybe ask someone to make sure you call them when you're feeling brave?

    I'm the same. I have been managing to read a book but I seem to be back to losing concentration after a few lines :sigh:
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    Feel like **** again. What's the blood point? And I'm having my crazy dreams again, had a horrible, horrible nightmare this morning and now I don't want to sleep again. Everything's so ****. My mother thinks the pills are working, they're ******* not. They change nothing. I feel just as **** as ever, I have the same ******* thoughts as ever. Everyone thinks I'll feel better after results day. Yeah, because that happened last time didn't it. If I get into uni, I have to decide whether or not I'm up to actually going, if I don't get in, then... And anyway last results day I did really well, so if results will change how I feel why did I sit on the floor and cry anyway?

    I just want to give up.
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    Oh God and next week I have to go for a meal out on Monday, see everyone on Thursday and then go away with friends and people I don't know for 3 days. Oh God.

    I have so much I need to talk about but I might just save that for talking therapy tomorrow if I actually manage to say anything other than "I don't know" :cry:
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    I want to cut again, really badly. I don't normally feel this in the day but it's been a growing emotion in me for a few days or two and I know where it'll end.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    I want to cut again, really badly. I don't normally feel this in the day but it's been a growing emotion in me for a few days or two and I know where it'll end.
    :hugs:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    I want to cut again, really badly. I don't normally feel this in the day but it's been a growing emotion in me for a few days or two and I know where it'll end.
    hey if you want to go to a museum or something this week, then I'm back in London now
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    (Original post by Magnum Opus)
    hey if you want to go to a museum or something this week, then I'm back in London now
    Awesome, not sure I'll have time this week but maybe soon? I'll get my rota tonight and see what it says
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Awesome, not sure I'll have time this week but maybe soon? I'll get my rota tonight and see what it says
    I am here indefinitely, so anytime you want :hugs:
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    (Original post by sauce)
    Ugh can totally relate to this. Seriously How am I going to cope in September?!
    :console: Is it your first year? unless you're doing medicine first year tends to be a bit easy, as long as you can vaguely talk in front of people in seminars it should hopefully be fine (and well, if you can't, there's always the skip seminars option :awesome: ).


    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: Maybe ask someone to make sure you call them when you're feeling brave?

    I'm the same. I have been managing to read a book but I seem to be back to losing concentration after a few lines :sigh:
    I never feel brave and the person who could call them refuses. :dry: Yeah, I've been trying to read the last harry potter and getting no where. Guess it says something that daily mail articles are easier to read than children's books.

    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Feel like **** again. What's the blood point? And I'm having my crazy dreams again, had a horrible, horrible nightmare this morning and now I don't want to sleep again. Everything's so ****. My mother thinks the pills are working, they're ******* not. They change nothing. I feel just as **** as ever, I have the same ******* thoughts as ever. Everyone thinks I'll feel better after results day. Yeah, because that happened last time didn't it. If I get into uni, I have to decide whether or not I'm up to actually going, if I don't get in, then... And anyway last results day I did really well, so if results will change how I feel why did I sit on the floor and cry anyway?

    I just want to give up.
    :hugs: If they're not working and you've given them a good go why not go back to your GP? Didn't you say you felt a little better but then worse again so maybe increase in dose if you want to continue trying with these.

    Hate when people pretend they know what's upsetting you.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    :console: Is it your first year? unless you're doing medicine first year tends to be a bit easy, as long as you can vaguely talk in front of people in seminars it should hopefully be fine (and well, if you can't, there's always the skip seminars option :awesome: ).

    It's my first year at college doing Access to Science 1 year. It's very intense :cry:
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    (Original post by sauce)
    It's my first year at college doing Access to Science 1 year. It's very intense :cry:
    If I can do it - then you can do it. :hugs:
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    If I can do it - then you can do it. :hugs:
    :hugs: thanks sweetheart :hugs:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Feel like **** again. What's the blood point? And I'm having my crazy dreams again, had a horrible, horrible nightmare this morning and now I don't want to sleep again. Everything's so ****. My mother thinks the pills are working, they're ******* not. They change nothing. I feel just as **** as ever, I have the same ******* thoughts as ever. Everyone thinks I'll feel better after results day. Yeah, because that happened last time didn't it. If I get into uni, I have to decide whether or not I'm up to actually going, if I don't get in, then... And anyway last results day I did really well, so if results will change how I feel why did I sit on the floor and cry anyway?

    I just want to give up.
    sorry to hear you're feeling so down at the moment :eek:

    don't you have someone close (not family or medical people) you can talk to when things get this bad??
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    I never feel brave and the person who could call them refuses. :dry: Yeah, I've been trying to read the last harry potter and getting no where. Guess it says something that daily mail articles are easier to read than children's books.



    :hugs: If they're not working and you've given them a good go why not go back to your GP? Didn't you say you felt a little better but then worse again so maybe increase in dose if you want to continue trying with these.

    Hate when people pretend they know what's upsetting you.
    :hugs: I hope you do get round to calling them.

    It's up to me as to whether or not I go up to 40mg. First the psychiatrist said to go up, then I mentioned my sleep was **** and he asked if I wanted to swap to something else to help, which I didn't. Then my mother came in and went on about results day etc and how I'll feel better then and how she doesn't want me increasing the dose. :cry:


    (Original post by davros)
    sorry to hear you're feeling so down at the moment :eek:

    don't you have someone close (not family or medical people) you can talk to when things get this bad??
    Thanks and nope, no one.
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: I hope you do get round to calling them.

    It's up to me as to whether or not I go up to 40mg. First the psychiatrist said to go up, then I mentioned my sleep was **** and he asked if I wanted to swap to something else to help, which I didn't. Then my mother came in and went on about results day etc and how I'll feel better then and how she doesn't want me increasing the dose. :cry:
    You have to take them and you know how you feel far more than your mother. Ok mums like to think they know best but really they don't with stuff like this. You could try sitting down and telling her about last results day etc, but tbh if it was me, I'd just wait until that day (19th isn't it?) and then when/if she's proved wrong decide what to do then. Of course if it's later away than that just do what you decide because she doesn't know whats going on for you, not exactly.

    If the dreams are caused by the antidepressant then upping the dose might make them worse. Then again some antidepressants lose certain side effects when you increase the dose.


    (Original post by sauce)
    It's my first year at college doing Access to Science 1 year. It's very intense :cry:
    Ah I see, yeah that does sound like hard work. Have you tried building it up slowly? take a look at your course outline and see if you can find the easiest thing on it to start with perhaps.

    Other than that, I dunno really, I just plan on doing the same as last year which is do no work all year, panic about exams and scrap a pass. :dontknow:
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    You have to take them and you know how you feel far more than your mother. Ok mums like to think they know best but really they don't with stuff like this. You could try sitting down and telling her about last results day etc, but tbh if it was me, I'd just wait until that day (19th isn't it?) and then when/if she's proved wrong decide what to do then. Of course if it's later away than that just do what you decide because she doesn't know whats going on for you, not exactly.

    If the dreams are caused by the antidepressant then upping the dose might make them worse. Then again some antidepressants lose certain side effects when you increase the dose.
    The psychiatrist seemed to agree with her. Everyone thinks they know how I feel better than I do. Whatever happens on Thursday, nothing will change. I will most likely up it to 40mg after Thursday but I'm going to London with some friends (which I am dreading) on the Friday so I don't want to do it until after that (will I have the side effects again? :erm:)

    I think it's caused by stress and starting to read fiction again. I didn't realise it was a vampire novel until I'd started it and by then the ****** up dreams had started
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    You have to take them and you know how you feel far more than your mother. Ok mums like to think they know best but really they don't with stuff like this. You could try sitting down and telling her about last results day etc, but tbh if it was me, I'd just wait until that day (19th isn't it?) and then when/if she's proved wrong decide what to do then. Of course if it's later away than that just do what you decide because she doesn't know whats going on for you, not exactly.

    If the dreams are caused by the antidepressant then upping the dose might make them worse. Then again some antidepressants lose certain side effects when you increase the dose.




    Ah I see, yeah that does sound like hard work. Have you tried building it up slowly? take a look at your course outline and see if you can find the easiest thing on it to start with perhaps.

    Other than that, I dunno really, I just plan on doing the same as last year which is do no work all year, panic about exams and scrap a pass. :dontknow:
    I'm hoping the fact I NEED this will scrape me a pass and somehow get into uni!
 
 
 
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