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    I hate men.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    I hate men.
    Whats up? :hugs:
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    (Original post by Idiot-Finder)
    Whats up? :hugs:
    Just this ****** little town... Can't wait til I'm out of here tomorrow morning. Too many people here, too much history, I can't wait to be a nameless face in a crowd again.
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Just this ****** little town... Can't wait til I'm out of here tomorrow morning. Too many people here, too much history, I can't wait to be a nameless face in a crowd again.
    Yeah atleast you can get away and do whatever you like

    ---

    These tablets seem to be awesome at the depression side but this high seems too be taking the piss... I should be hungover right now and depressed that I have just said bye to 80% of my best mates... instead I am buzzing :gah:

    What I would do for normal emotions
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    I'm concerned uni will cause a relapse :erm:
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    (Original post by Loz17)
    I'm concerned uni will cause a relapse :erm:
    Me too.
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    :ditto:
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    I'm pretty sure uni will make me relapse.
    I'm starting to think I don't know who I am or want to be and I feel even more disconnected at uni. argh. :sad:
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    (Original post by Loz17)
    I'm concerned uni will cause a relapse :erm:
    Me five :erm:
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    I think this shows uni is infact deadly.
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    Sooooo fed up and feel old feelings of deep depression rearing their awful head.
    At this very second I could quite happily lie in the middle of a busy road without fear.
    Yet I do not feel agitated, nervous or frantic at all. I'm perfectly calm right now and doing it makes perfect sense to me.
    I'm unhappy with life and I feel racked with guilt as I've got it pretty easy. Great boyfriend who works full time to support me through university and college who treats me lots, working towards what I "want" and have nearly lost a stone in weight. However I feel like I don't deserve my boyfriend. at all. I feel so useless. I feel like I'll fail at what I want or change my mind despite how much I want it now. And I feel like I'll end up putting on the weight I've lost and more and not be able to control it. This is a massive fear and the way I feel right now I don't feel like going out more than absolutely necessary so going to the gym is a massive task.
    On top of that I have a chronic lack of motivation at the start of the year when the workload is so small. I'm aiming for a distinction in this course and I'm just on TSR instead of writing essays and catching up on reading that I need to do to stand out from the rest.
    Also another thing stressing me out is my car got a chip and my MOT is due on Monday yet I can't get the chip fixed till Wednesday. It means I can't drive my car OR if I do knowing my luck will get pulled over by the police. Feeling so stressed about this makes me feel so pathetic and worthless as well. For ****'s sake.

    Seriously why do I feel like this? Why am I so selfish? Because I must be to feel this way about my life.

    Feel awful, attempt to change this, fail, things maybe even getting slightly worse=end it. Makes sense right now.
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    (Original post by sauce)
    Sooooo fed up and feel old feelings of deep depression rearing their awful head.
    At this very second I could quite happily lie in the middle of a busy road without fear.
    Yet I do not feel agitated, nervous or frantic at all. I'm perfectly calm right now and doing it makes perfect sense to me.
    I'm unhappy with life and I feel racked with guilt as I've got it pretty easy. Great boyfriend who works full time to support me through university and college who treats me lots, working towards what I "want" and have nearly lost a stone in weight. However I feel like I don't deserve my boyfriend. at all. I feel so useless. I feel like I'll fail at what I want or change my mind despite how much I want it now. And I feel like I'll end up putting on the weight I've lost and more and not be able to control it. This is a massive fear and the way I feel right now I don't feel like going out more than absolutely necessary so going to the gym is a massive task.
    On top of that I have a chronic lack of motivation at the start of the year when the workload is so small. I'm aiming for a distinction in this course and I'm just on TSR instead of writing essays and catching up on reading that I need to do to stand out from the rest.
    Also another thing stressing me out is my car got a chip and my MOT is due on Monday yet I can't get the chip fixed till Wednesday. It means I can't drive my car OR if I do knowing my luck will get pulled over by the police. Feeling so stressed about this makes me feel so pathetic and worthless as well. For ****'s sake.

    Seriously why do I feel like this? Why am I so selfish? Because I must be to feel this way about my life.

    Feel awful, attempt to change this, fail, things maybe even getting slightly worse=end it. Makes sense right now.
    :hugs: Lil, maybe it's worth going to see your GP and asking for some help?
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Me five :erm:
    Me six
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    (Original post by sauce)
    Sooooo fed up and feel old feelings of deep depression rearing their awful head.
    At this very second I could quite happily lie in the middle of a busy road without fear.
    Yet I do not feel agitated, nervous or frantic at all. I'm perfectly calm right now and doing it makes perfect sense to me.
    I'm unhappy with life and I feel racked with guilt as I've got it pretty easy. Great boyfriend who works full time to support me through university and college who treats me lots, working towards what I "want" and have nearly lost a stone in weight. However I feel like I don't deserve my boyfriend. at all. I feel so useless. I feel like I'll fail at what I want or change my mind despite how much I want it now. And I feel like I'll end up putting on the weight I've lost and more and not be able to control it. This is a massive fear and the way I feel right now I don't feel like going out more than absolutely necessary so going to the gym is a massive task.
    On top of that I have a chronic lack of motivation at the start of the year when the workload is so small. I'm aiming for a distinction in this course and I'm just on TSR instead of writing essays and catching up on reading that I need to do to stand out from the rest.
    Also another thing stressing me out is my car got a chip and my MOT is due on Monday yet I can't get the chip fixed till Wednesday. It means I can't drive my car OR if I do knowing my luck will get pulled over by the police. Feeling so stressed about this makes me feel so pathetic and worthless as well. For ****'s sake.

    Seriously why do I feel like this? Why am I so selfish? Because I must be to feel this way about my life.

    Feel awful, attempt to change this, fail, things maybe even getting slightly worse=end it. Makes sense right now.
    Please go to the GP sweetie :hugs:
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    :hugs: Lil, maybe it's worth going to see your GP and asking for some help?
    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Please go to the GP sweetie :hugs:
    It is definitely the only option really right now. However when I go to the GP I feel like they're asking me why and what I want from them. I don't ******* know okay :cry: I just want things to be better :cry:
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    (Original post by sauce)
    It is definitely the only option really right now. However when I go to the GP I feel like they're asking me why and what I want from them. I don't ******* know okay :cry: I just want things to be better :cry:
    Tell them that, that's what I did :hugs: They're used to it
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    (Original post by steffi.alexa)
    Tell them that, that's what I did :hugs: They're used to it
    I miss my old GP. The ones at the new surgery I've visited have all been weird. First one I saw about a doc cert and he was wearing tracksuit bottoms and a sweat top. It was really weird and he was really scruffy but meh. Then I saw this other woman and she was okay but gave me some weird contraceptive advice. Then I saw this other old guy who was pervy and asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up and if I rid my bike to the surgery. This was also about contraception. Hmmm. I hate playing lucky dip with GP's.
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    (Original post by sauce)
    I miss my old GP. The ones at the new surgery I've visited have all been weird. First one I saw about a doc cert and he was wearing tracksuit bottoms and a sweat top. It was really weird and he was really scruffy but meh. Then I saw this other woman and she was okay but gave me some weird contraceptive advice. Then I saw this other old guy who was pervy and asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up and if I rid my bike to the surgery. This was also about contraception. Hmmm. I hate playing lucky dip with GP's.
    Go to a different surgery? I found requesting a female GP made me more relaxed (I have a thing being in the same room as strange men I don't know.) and more able to open up...
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    (Original post by kiss_me_now9)
    Go to a different surgery? I found requesting a female GP made me more relaxed (I have a thing being in the same room as strange men I don't know.) and more able to open up...
    I don't know this town very well at all and this is the only surgery I know.
    I dislike most women so I'm probably the opposite.
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    I'm scared to sleep but so tired :cry: :cry: :cry: I just binged on cornflakes as well :erm: probably a good time to sleep.
 
 
 
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