Depression Society MKIII Watch

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kiss_me_now9
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#1241
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#1241
(Original post by BruceTaylor)
Feeling horribly low, I can't take it :cry:
I'm sorry :sad: Is anything making you feel low? :console:
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kiss_me_now9
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#1242
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#1242
:cry: I don't want this anymore, I wish I could take these last few months back and start over :cry: Sometimes I think I don't want to 'get better'
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D-Day
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#1243
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#1243
This past week was strangely ok. I've felt so ****** from seasonal allergies that I've not had a chance to feel low. Now I'm back to feeling anxious and nervous and like I'm wasting my life. Yay...
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Elements
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#1244
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#1244
(Original post by kiss_me_now9)
:cry: I don't want this anymore, I wish I could take these last few months back and start over :cry: Sometimes I think I don't want to 'get better'
Recovery may be hard but isn't the alternative much worse!

:hugs:
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becki08
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#1245
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#1245
What a crap day. I swear everything that's possible has gone wrong today. I'm beginning to wonder whether coming back to uni is a good idea or whether I'm going to end up breaking down again. Saying that, it'll probably happen whatever.
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Malsy
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#1246
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#1246
:sad: :nothing: :nothing: :nothing: :sick:
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Sabertooth
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#1247
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#1247
first day back at uni and I was in tears on the way back from class. ******* awesome start!
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kiss_me_now9
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#1248
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#1248
(Original post by Elements)
Recovery may be hard but isn't the alternative much worse!

:hugs:
Not really sure on that one tbh :/ Sigh.
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RachelOranges
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#1249
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#1249
Hey, I'm kinda new to all of this.
I haven't been diagnosed with depression or anything ( "then why are you on here" I hear you scream) but I do suffer really badly from anxiety. It only really became a problem a few weeks ago when I moved to Uni. But the bad feelings have been around since I started A levels. I get days where I'm fine and couldn't be happier but then something kicks in and its the worst feeling in the world. I think the idea of being in a new environment and having to look after my self scared the hell out of me. I've been so dependent on my parents and miss my family so much ( especially mum)...I've had several panic attacks in the last couple of weeks...feels horrible, like I'm going mad and like I'm dying. I've also lost my appetite. I feel dizzy every time I eat...I just have this constant fear that something will go wrong...
I used to love sleeping but recently haven't been able to, I go to bed shivering and drift in and out of dreams. ( last night I hardly got any sleep, maximum 3hrs and I had lectures all day today)...
All of this makes me feel crap, like I'm loosing control.
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Nothos
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#1250
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#1250
:cry:
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kiss_me_now9
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#1251
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#1251
Bruce :hugs: You ok?

I haven't felt this bad in weeks, I'm so stressed and scared about Thursday (mainly because I haven't phoned them to confirm the appointment - if they don't ring, I'm going to have to lie and say they did). I need to cut... I really need to. I've lied to my two best mates that I'm fine and that I'm going to bed but I'm not, I'm waiting til my parents go to sleep first. :cry: I can't do this anymore :cry:
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starchild
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#1252
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#1252
Im awake and have been for an hour, no one to talk to and all my problems are just cycling round my head. I dont know what to do I hate the vulnerability of waking up every 3-4am. Just hate myself right now. I want to sleep, im so tired but also wide awake and i dont know what to do to stop myself

a) waking up all the time and getting distracted by thoughts
b) shutting my thoughts up so i can get some sleep.

Any advice?
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starchild
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#1253
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#1253
(Original post by RachelOranges)
Hey, I'm kinda new to all of this.
I haven't been diagnosed with depression or anything ( "then why are you on here" I hear you scream) but I do suffer really badly from anxiety. It only really became a problem a few weeks ago when I moved to Uni. But the bad feelings have been around since I started A levels. I get days where I'm fine and couldn't be happier but then something kicks in and its the worst feeling in the world. I think the idea of being in a new environment and having to look after my self scared the hell out of me. I've been so dependent on my parents and miss my family so much ( especially mum)...I've had several panic attacks in the last couple of weeks...feels horrible, like I'm going mad and like I'm dying. I've also lost my appetite. I feel dizzy every time I eat...I just have this constant fear that something will go wrong...
I used to love sleeping but recently haven't been able to, I go to bed shivering and drift in and out of dreams. ( last night I hardly got any sleep, maximum 3hrs and I had lectures all day today)...
All of this makes me feel crap, like I'm loosing control.
:hugs: Welcome to the society where everyone is here for you. Please please dont give up. Can you talk to your parents or someone at uni because lots of students struggle? I went to see my counselling department and they helped a lot with me, but then again thats me.

Dont loose control, try and stay as calm as possible. I know its hard for me to say that, but do try your hardest. Can you listen to some relaxing music, I recommend Ludovico Einaudi (any song) or Howard Goodall's 'Enchanted Voices', both should be on youtube. I know Einaudi is, hes helped me through many tough times.

By the way, im Sitara. *waves*
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starchild
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#1254
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#1254
P.s just saw your profile, you like Take That, so do I I like you you have good taste. Any favourite song? I like 'Rule the World' at the moment, it makes me feel fuzzy
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bansheeee*
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#1255
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#1255
I have started my medication for my anziety - they told me i have severe anxiety which was let go too far,, im on rhisperdol i also have CBT , its going okay....im on xanex 3 times a day too...woo.
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Sabertooth
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#1256
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#1256
Feeling so so ****. Don't know what to do: it's taking all my willpower not to walk to tesco and buy some razors. They're so ******* loud won't shut the **** up. goddamnit. Why can't I just fit in for once? I'm not asking much just once in my life I'd like to fit in but no, everyone I talk to has better things they'd prefer to be doing like texting someone to avoid having to even look at me whilst I try to talk to them. Joined the squash society ****** if I'm going though how the hell can I play with all these cuts and scars they'll just treat me like the freak I am. I just want to be normal and fit in I hate being like this. ******* freak, deserve everything I get. I hate myself and need to cut just to make them shut the **** up.
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becki08
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#1257
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#1257
(Original post by Sabertooth)
Feeling so so ****. Don't know what to do: it's taking all my willpower not to walk to tesco and buy some razors. They're so ******* loud won't shut the **** up. goddamnit. Why can't I just fit in for once? I'm not asking much just once in my life I'd like to fit in but no, everyone I talk to has better things they'd prefer to be doing like texting someone to avoid having to even look at me whilst I try to talk to them. Joined the squash society ****** if I'm going though how the hell can I play with all these cuts and scars they'll just treat me like the freak I am. I just want to be normal and fit in I hate being like this. ******* freak, deserve everything I get. I hate myself and need to cut just to make them shut the **** up.
*hugs* You're not a freak honey. Could you listen to some loud music with headphones in to try and drown out the voices. You don't need to cut, you're worth more than this. Well done for joining the squash society. Could you wear long sleeves/sweat bands to try and cover up the cuts? People should accept you for who you are with or without scars anyway. Hope you feel better soon. Here if you want to talk :hugs:
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becki08
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#1258
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#1258
(Original post by starchild)
Im awake and have been for an hour, no one to talk to and all my problems are just cycling round my head. I dont know what to do I hate the vulnerability of waking up every 3-4am. Just hate myself right now. I want to sleep, im so tired but also wide awake and i dont know what to do to stop myself

a) waking up all the time and getting distracted by thoughts
b) shutting my thoughts up so i can get some sleep.

Any advice?

I find that listening to relaxation music helps me to get off to sleep because I can concentrate on the music rather than on my thoughts. Saying that, I listened to it last night and was still awake at 5 am but it does normally help! I don't know what to suggest about the waking up though. :hugs:
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Sabertooth
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#1259
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#1259
(Original post by becki08)
*hugs* You're not a freak honey. Could you listen to some loud music with headphones in to try and drown out the voices. You don't need to cut, you're worth more than this. Well done for joining the squash society. Could you wear long sleeves/sweat bands to try and cover up the cuts? People should accept you for who you are with or without scars anyway. Hope you feel better soon. Here if you want to talk :hugs:
Thanks for the offer becki

I just had a class, felt able to take my hoody off and despite some comments I overheard it was bearable. You're absolutely right people should accept others but they often don't and that's what I'm scared of, will look into wearing long sleeves might just go for it without, I dunno, I'm feeling a little better took prn meds might be why.

How're you?
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sil3nt_cha0s
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#1260
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#1260
I'm foolish - I haven't got to know the people in my corridor at university within the first few days very well, and I'm seriously scared of going into the kitchen on my own with loads of people in
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