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Our parents don't let us sleep in the same room together Watch

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    (Original post by Wild Thing)
    SLIGHT difference: he was 18, you're 16.

    I'm nearly 22 and my boyfriend of nearly 2 years doesnt sleep in my room either. It'd be pretty ******* weird to be fair.

    Their house, their rules.

    like the other guy said, my brother is 18, but when he was 16 he was allowed,

    (Original post by Anon the 7th)
    she said hes 18 NOW, but he was allowed to sleep in the same bed as his gf when he was her age (16)
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    (Original post by Holli2011)
    have a word with them about your brother im sure they will have their reasons, its sad to say girls tend to get treated different than boys, there were twins in my year for instance one boy one girl, obv the same age, the boy could stay out all night do what he wanted and the girl had to be home at 10/11, its sad but girls are seen as more vulnerable. I dont know if you can change their views, but its probably worth more talking to them and saying you feel its unfair after your brother got treated differently. My mum was strict like your parents but let me stay in my room with my bf when i was 16 (nearly 17) but simply because she liked him and trusted him, perhaps this is an issue your parents may have?

    yeah, its pretty much prejudice, but seen as being prejudice thats Okay.

    but nahh my parents definately like my boyfriends, they talk about him so much sometimes I think THEY should be the ones going out with him :yes:
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    In my opinion, your parents are being foolish, and unless you're extremely immature, they're completely unjustified.
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    When I was 16 I barely saw my boyfriend in my own house! Only saw him at school, and out and about in town. He came over for three hours on a Saturday afternoon after I'd finished at my part time job, and my Dad would drop him home around 7pm before we had dinner. That was IT!!

    I think its fair enough that your parents don't let you and your bf sleep in the same room. You're only 16! My friend who's 20, nearly 21, is not allowed to have her bf sleep in her room when he stays either! Its your parents rules, and I think they do it so they have some control over what you're doing. If you got pregnant, then they'd be accused of being irresponsible by allowing you two to do whatever you wanted. I agree with others who have said it...you need to grow up, in two senses of the word. There's plenty of time for boyfriend bed-sharing when you're older. But right now, you've only just reached the age of consent ffs.
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    (Original post by veronica111)
    yeah, its pretty much prejudice, but seen as being prejudice thats Okay.

    but nahh my parents definitely like my boyfriends, they talk about him so much sometimes I think THEY should be the ones going out with him :yes:
    Then I think you should be asking THEM why they dont allow you, and not us! I agree its not fair that your brother had different rules, but as others have pointed out, he is a boy! And he can't screw his life up by getting himself pregnant now can he? Even though if he got a girl pregnant he would have some pretty serious consequences himself...but I don't know what your parents' logic is! Ask them!!!
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    That sucks
    Why does no one here like sleeping with their other half??? f*** sleep its still lush (sorry if that sound like im rubbing it in :s)
    My mums always gone to sleep before me so its never been an issue luckily, but this is at 17/18 not 16. Although 16 doesnt make that much of a difference imo, and you've been going out a long time so its clearly serious.

    But if they feel that uncomfortable about it theres not much you can do Maybe he could sleep on the sofa and sneek into your room very late, with an alarm so he can get out in the morning?
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    (Original post by Phugoid)
    In my opinion, your parents are being foolish, and unless you're extremely immature, they're completely unjustified.
    No. Just, no.
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    Do you want to sleep with him or sleep in the same bed?

    Why the **** would anyone want to just sleep in the same bed with someone else (without the sex)?! You'd have less space and have to wake up next to a stinky person (everyone is dirty when they wake up!).
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    (Original post by sophisticated)
    There's plenty of time for boyfriend bed-sharing when you're older. But right now, you've only just reached the age of consent ffs.
    Err, what?

    So now not only do you have to reach the age of consent, you also have to surpass it by a considerable amount before people like you will accept that it's not wrong? Why do we even have the age of consent if, once you reach it, there's still a stigma attached?

    This is a complete load of nonsense. And can I just point out that there is no age of consent for sleeping in the same bed together, there is only an age of consent for having sex, so I don't even know why the age of consent is relevant to the discussion.
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    (Original post by sophisticated)
    Then I think you should be asking THEM why they dont allow you, and not us! I agree its not fair that your brother had different rules, but as others have pointed out, he is a boy! And he can't screw his life up by getting himself pregnant now can he? Even though if he got a girl pregnant he would have some pretty serious consequences himself...but I don't know what your parents' logic is! Ask them!!!

    yeah I suppose, mmm was just interested in your guys opinions
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    (Original post by Phugoid)
    Err, what?

    So now not only do you have to reach the age of consent, you also have to surpass it by a considerable amount before people like you will accept that it's not wrong? Why do we even have the age of consent if, once you reach it, there's still a stigma attached?

    This is a complete load of nonsense. And can I just point out that there is no age of consent for sleeping in the same bed together, there is only an age of consent for having sex, so I don't even know why the age of consent is relevant to the discussion.
    I'm not saying that them sleeping in the same bed, having sex, whatever would be wrong. I'm saying that her parents are perfectly within their rights to enforce rules. I've heard of some parents being ALOT stricter! No boyfriends in the house, no boyfriends in bedrooms during the day with the door shut, no boyfriends at all! The OP is lucky compared to some people! As I said, when I was 16, my boyfriend wasn't allowed to stay past 7pm, let alone stay over! And I agree its not fair, but she IS only 16. People older than that aren't allowed to have their boyfriends stay in the same room either. I wasn't when I was 18/19, my friend still isn't and she's approaching 21! I think the OP (and you) need to get over it and respect parents' rules in parents' house, cos its not really the end of the world, and unfortunately there ain't nuthin you can do about it until you move about :p:
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    (Original post by sophisticated)
    No. Just, no.
    Why not? I made two statements in that post, and both of them are correct:

    I said her parents were foolish. Why is this true? Because sex isn't some mad practice that can only occur in bedrooms. If you think that not allowing your child to share a bed with their partner is going to stop them from having sex, then you are very foolish indeed. Sex is a natural thing, it's an urge people get for people they are attracted to, and it certainly isn't confined to the bedrooms of the people involved. As soon as the parents backs are turned, as soon as the parents go on holiday, as soon as the parents go out shopping, as soon as they find a love shack, they're going to do it. So are the parents foolish for imposing these demands? Yes. Because their demand, A, does not stop action B from occurring, so it makes no sense to impose it.

    I also said her parents are unjustified unless she is extremely immature. Why is this true? Because, if she's mature, then there's no difference between her and a 25 year old, mentally nor physically. So why should they deem it inappropriate?

    Now, yes, it is natural for parents to be protective of their children. But is it rational and justified? That's a different question altogether, and in this case, the answer is no.
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    no wonder UK has really high teenage pregnancy rate!
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    well if they think they are sheltering you personally, especially if you want to go to uni i think they should let you start being independant, my cousin was very sheltered and not allowed boys in her room etc and when she went to uni she made loads of mistakes and got in so much trouble and many compromising situations because she just had not built up sense and independance
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    (Original post by KinkyBear)
    no wonder UK has really high teenage pregnancy rate!
    LOL
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    (Original post by Phugoid)
    Why not? I made two statements in that post, and both of them are correct:

    I said her parents were foolish. Why is this true? Because sex isn't some mad practice that can only occur in bedrooms. If you think that not allowing your child to share a bed with their partner is going to stop them from having sex, then you are very foolish indeed. Sex is a natural thing, it's an urge people get for people they are attracted to, and it certainly isn't confined to the bedrooms of the people involved. As soon as the parents backs are turned, as soon as the parents go on holiday, as soon as the parents go out shopping, as soon as they find a love shack, they're going to do it. So are the parents foolish for imposing these demands? Yes. Because their demand, A, does not stop action B from occurring, so it makes no sense to impose it.

    I also said her parents are unjustified unless she is extremely immature. Why is this true? Because, if she's mature, then there's no difference between her and a 25 year old, mentally nor physically. So why should they deem it inappropriate?

    Now, yes, it is natural for parents to be protective of their children. But is it rational and justified? That's a different question altogether, and in this case, the answer is no.
    Again, ITS THEIR HOUSE!
    There's nothing you can say that can defeat that argument. And if you reckon there is, then obviously you have no respect for your elders and your parents that put a roof over your head.

    I completely disagree with you. Her parents aren't being irrational or unjustified. Plenty of parents have the same rules, and more.
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    When I was 16 I had been with my boyfriend for 2 years (he's about 1.5 years older than me) and we were not allowed to start sleeping in the same room until the beginning of this year when I was 17 & he was 18.
    You could try talking to them about it and asking for their reasons. But really, it's their rules, so...
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    (Original post by sophisticated)
    I'm not saying that them sleeping in the same bed, having sex, whatever would be wrong. I'm saying that her parents are perfectly within their rights to enforce rules. I've heard of some parents being ALOT stricter! No boyfriends in the house, no boyfriends in bedrooms during the day with the door shut, no boyfriends at all! The OP is lucky compared to some people! As I said, when I was 16, my boyfriend wasn't allowed to stay past 7pm, let alone stay over! And I agree its not fair, but she IS only 16. People older than that aren't allowed to have their boyfriends stay in the same room either. I wasn't when I was 18/19, my friend still isn't and she's approaching 21! I think the OP (and you) need to get over it and respect parents' rules in parents' house, cos its not really the end of the world, and unfortunately there ain't nuthin you can do about it until you move about :p:
    Simply because there are people worse off does not justify her parents actions. By your logic they are perfectly within their rights to beat her and lock her in a dark room for weeks on end, after all, some parents are much, much worse than that.

    Simply because the actions of some parents are worse than the actions of the OP's parents [b]does not mean that the OP's parent's actions are justified or right[b].

    Secondly, so what if she's only 16? Surely it doesn't matter what age she is, it matters how mature she is. There are some 30 year olds who shouldn't be in charge of their own consent to sex, and there are some 14 year olds who are mature enough to make the decision. You can't slap a number on it and say... yeah... this is the line the divides black and white. There is no line, it's a grey area, and for all you know, the OP is very, very mature.

    And no, I will not "respect" a parent's rules. I don't respect anything that has no basis, that is unjustified, or irrational. You cannot demand respect for something simply because you are a parent, or simply because you own the house. It is a complete non-sequitur.
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    (Original post by Holli2011)
    well if they think they are sheltering you personally, especially if you want to go to uni i think they should let you start being independant, my cousin was very sheltered and not allowed boys in her room etc and when she went to uni she made loads of mistakes and got in so much trouble and many compromising situations because she just had not built up sense and independance
    Thats silly. I wasn't allowed boyfriends to sleep in my room either, but that didn't mean that as soon as I got to Uni I started having sex with anything that moved, neither did anyone else I know who hadn't been allowed to do whatever they pleased at home. I think your cousin is a one off.
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    (Original post by Phugoid)
    Simply because there are people worse off does not justify her parents actions. By your logic they are perfectly within their rights to beat her and lock her in a dark room for weeks on end, after all, some parents are much, much worse than that.

    Simply because the actions of some parents are worse than the actions of the OP's parents [b]does not mean that the OP's parent's actions are justified or right[b].

    Secondly, so what if she's only 16? Surely it doesn't matter what age she is, it matters how mature she is. There are some 30 year olds who shouldn't be in charge of their own consent to sex, and there are some 14 year olds who are mature enough to make the decision. You can't slap a number on it and say... yeah... this is the line the divides black and white. There is no line, it's a grey area, and for all you know, the OP is very, very mature.

    And no, I will not "respect" a parent's rules. I don't respect anything that has no basis, that is unjustified, or irrational. You cannot demand respect for something simply because you are a parent, or simply because you own the house. It is a complete non-sequitur.
    I reckon if the OP was more mature than her age, then she wouldn't be on an internet forum whining to complete strangers (most of whom who have replied the same as me) about how unfair her parents are being just because they won't let her do whatever she damn well likes. That is all. Clearly you and I just have a difference of opinion, but I'm not the only one who thinks that the parents are well within their rights to have some rules in place so why don't you go argue with someone else? :yep:
 
 
 
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