Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Need your help-sort me out! Watch

    Offline

    14
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I have been to counselling countless times. Everytime it ends the same way: the counsellor asks me to talk about that night and I say I dont think I trust her enough. And its true. I dont trust people like that. Unless they are someone I have known for a while..otherwise, if I can be totally anon as in here, yea I can talk everything...been to doctors as well.
    You have to make that leap of faith. If you don't open up and trust anyone, no-one can help you, and you've backed yourself into a corner. It's a matter of forcing yourself.

    You can pm me if you want to know more. I study in this area.
    • #2
    #2

    You're a whore
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You're a whore
    well thank you. atleast there's someone here who's bold enough to talk whatever he/she thinks of me/my situation. But now that u have told me that, I want to know more: give me reasons to make me feel certain/strongly convinced about what u just said!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Well do that then - talk about it in here. I do believe you have to talk about it.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    well thank you. atleast there's someone here who's bold enough to talk whatever he/she thinks of me/my situation. But now that u have told me that, I want to know more: give me reasons to make me feel certain/strongly convinced about what u just said!
    Here's a few points, no long speeches because a girl like you doesnt deserve attention (in a way you are seeking attention, thats why you bumped the thread right?)

    1) You dont respect your body, someone used you and you have no willpower to stand on your own two feet anymore
    2) You watch porn.
    3) You hold the belief that life is cheap, only that you make it cheap.
    4) You show signs of a violent personality and some insanity. I wouldnt say its arose due to your bad experiences though, not your fault. It's who you are.
    5) You will fail according to the self fulfilling prophecy which makes will bring embarassment to your parents. Least you could do is let them know of it before it happens.
    6) You are a sexual object made for my sexual gratification, but you're in denial.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Here's a few points, no long speeches because a girl like you doesnt deserve attention (in a way you are seeking attention, thats why you bumped the thread right?)

    1) You dont respect your body, someone used you and you have no willpower to stand on your own two feet anymore
    2) You watch porn.
    3) You hold the belief that life is cheap, only that you make it cheap.
    4) You show signs of a violent personality and some insanity. I wouldnt say its arose due to your bad experiences though, not your fault. It's who you are.
    5) You will fail according to the self fulfilling prophecy which makes will bring embarassment to your parents. Least you could do is let them know of it before it happens.
    6) You are a sexual object made for my sexual gratification, but you're in denial.
    Well why did/do u read this thread then, if u arent bothered to "give me attention"?
    You are right about the points u made, except point 4), 5) and 6). NO I AM NOT A SEXUAL OBJECT. you have got to explain why u think i am "a sexual object made for sexual gratification". is that because I am female? or because I feel promiscous and devalue my body? If I were in denial of accepting what I "feel", why should I even be acknowldeging it in the first place? And if it didnt dawn upon you yet, I created this thread so that people could help me (either save my life or destroy it).

    No I dont agree that I am violent and insane. If I were violent I would be cutting myself up or actually be on the streets now. I am infact very well-behaved, only I have little or no room for people like u who state their opinions as facts without having much to back them up with. Sorry, if u have got to deal with me, you have got to state more of a fact/evidence. I am not buying ur opinions.

    Yes, I do see my life as something really cheap. But I never (even before rape) did and still dont 'feel' human life as cheap. Maybe thats why I want to search for a reason for my existence? Maybe thats why my internal self (whatever good is left of it) doesnt want to give up, cos maybe somewhere I still beleive in the good-will of humanity.But this has been my view of my life still my rape. Before that, life was the most beautiful thing I had.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by daveroberts79)
    Well do that then - talk about it in here. I do believe you have to talk about it.
    first off, thanks tht u even want to help. May I ask u to ask whatever it is that u want to know in order to help. Its easier for me tht way cos I really dont know where to begin it all from and what will be relevant. So ask, and I'll be sure to answer.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well why did/do u read this thread then, if u arent bothered to "give me attention"?
    You are right about the points u made, except point 4), 5) and 6). NO I AM NOT A SEXUAL OBJECT. you have got to explain why u think i am "a sexual object made for sexual gratification". is that because I am female? or because I feel promiscous and devalue my body? If I were in denial of accepting what I "feel", why should I even be acknowldeging it in the first place? And if it didnt dawn upon you yet, I created this thread so that people could help me (either save my life or destroy it).

    No I dont agree that I am violent and insane. If I were violent I would be cutting myself up or actually be on the streets now. I am infact very well-behaved, only I have little or no room for people like u who state their opinions as facts without having much to back them up with. Sorry, if u have got to deal with me, you have got to state more of a fact/evidence. I am not buying ur opinions.

    Yes, I do see my life as something really cheap. But I never (even before rape) did and still dont 'feel' human life as cheap. Maybe thats why I want to search for a reason for my existence? Maybe thats why my internal self (whatever good is left of it) doesnt want to give up, cos maybe somewhere I still beleive in the good-will of humanity.But this has been my view of my life still my rape. Before that, life was the most beautiful thing I had.
    Because you deserved my pity/sympathy atleast. Be thankful, Im replying to you once again as Im in a good mood.

    I think you know that no one can help you, lets put this to perspective, 20 odd replies to the thread and you're still at square one.

    Yes, it's because you're a girl that you feel promusiciuty but then thats a common in all girls. And you want to guess another thing? Another way of putting that is all girls are sluts. It's the reason why I have such opinions towards you. It is in the nature of females to be promiscious and you're one of them Im afraid, you just come with the added feature of having a low self-esteem.

    So do you agree that you're hatred of man is due to having the bad experience that you did? Because if its the bad experience that caused you to start thinking of life as cheap then you're pretty narrowminded and dont deserve the life.
    I still think my point 6) applies. There doesnt have to be a reason to it! your replies in this thread demonstrate it.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Because you deserved my pity/sympathy atleast. Be thankful, Im replying to you once again as Im in a good mood.

    I think you know that no one can help you, lets put this to perspective, 20 odd replies to the thread and you're still at square one.

    Yes, it's because you're a girl that you feel promusiciuty but then thats a common in all girls. And you want to guess another thing? Another way of putting that is all girls are sluts. It's the reason why I have such opinions towards you. It is in the nature of females to be promiscious and you're one of them Im afraid, you just come with the added feature of having a low self-esteem.

    So do you agree that you're hatred of man is due to having the bad experience that you did? Because if its the bad experience that caused you to start thinking of life as cheap then you're pretty narrowminded and dont deserve the life.
    I still think my point 6) applies. There doesnt have to be a reason to it! your replies in this thread demonstrate it.
    GTFO! you are the type of men who should be hanged and put to death straight away. I bet your mom regrets tht she ever gave you birth! good luck with thinking of women as promiscous whores. the truth is men are big time cowards-they cant accept the truth of Nature, that woman are holy and sacred and life-givers. Men are *******! thats what they are! Not all, but most (not an inherent trait, but a finely acquired one). And you are a perfect example of that!
    So now, get the **** of this thread you moronic male-scum-of the planet!
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    yeah ok you've made mistakes but who's to say it's too late to stop and turn it around? you have the advantage of choice on your side....... don't waste your life, not when there's so much potential (which you may not see right now)

    please do pm me as i do want to help. i won't ask for your name or anything irrelevant, i just wanna help
    oh ok,here's more about my situation.
    As i said above, I am repeating my year 2 at uni and possibly will fail this year too ...It all started with me being thru rape several years ago. Although I am a heterosexual, I hate men (a lot), and what I see on the porn vids reminds me of the bad time i went thru and it all somehow seems to be part of me. I feel promiscous. I hate sex. I hate men. I hate that men do these sort of things to women (prostitues)under the label of 'legal' and consensual...what happened to me is not legal but am I any different (in my make, i.e. i am a female human) than these prostitues? I feel not. Well, I dont have much respect for my body as I dont 'feel care' for it. I guess I am not making sense, but its hard to describe what i feel unless I put it in graphic detail and then it'll be gross..way too gross I s'pose.
    I will pm u probably, but i'd like to know what gender are you. I am equally happy to receive advice/help/suggestions from males as well as females but it just helps me to someone;s age and gender to decide how much i can possibly tell them.[/QUOTE]

    See thats where your wrong, you are very different. Despite your situation and experience, though it may feel like your attacker took every ounce of this from you, you kept your dignity, you did not stoop to what you see prostitutes doing. You have gone to university to try and create a future for yourself with prospects, if you were the same as these girls youd have thrown the towel in a long long time ago and be on street corners of a night, so you have no idea how strong you already are. I think that with a bit of counselling and certainly with your familys help (you need to talk to them or at least some of them) you can get through uni and get the future you deserve which will be VERY different to what you see those girls in porn vids doing, you will have the choice to keep those private elements in your life exactly that, private, and you will regain respect for yourself and provided you meet some decent ones you will gain your confidence back in men - there are some very good ones out there among the masses of awful ones!

    EDIT: may i add respect for yourself which should never have been lost, what happened to you was no fault of your own and you should not punish yourself for it, but sadly with events like these it is hard not to but as said by others PM me if you want further advice, im female if that helps
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Gjaykay)
    See-I-dunno-what-to-believe.

    most
    -rape-victems-shy-away-from-human-contact-especially-male.Although-you-say-you-hate-sex-and-hate-men-but-then-say-you-feel-like-a-prostitute-for-sleeping-around-yeah-that-doesn't-seem-that-logical.

    However-if-all-thats-the-truth-which-it-very-well-could-be-then-go-and-see-a-doctor=instead-of-posting-on-here
    Rape normally totally strips a woman of any sense of self-worth and she often feels like all she is is a body to be abused for the pleasure of others, whch in a viscious circle that means the woman often has unpleasant sexual encounters which further make her feel degraded because she feels it is all she deserves which keeps feeing back into itself. I imagine there is an element of self blame and using sexual acts as a form of self punishment?
    • #3
    #3

    :nopity: :troll:
    I'm sorry but that is the image I get from this thread. Each of your posts have not changed my idea especially asking that guy to hang himself and that his mum should be ashamed for giving birth to him.
    You come across as attention-seeking and wanting people to qualify the way you treat your OWN body.
    So what if you watch porn there is nothing wrong with that.
    However, displays of wanting to punch yourself to physical numbness etc is really not one of a stable mind if it is true as well as your violent outbursts as pointed out above - it is these I would seek help for tbh.

    Perhaps if you stopped sleeping with men you wouldn't be promiscuous:eek: and even crazier don't let them pay you then you won't be a prostitute :eek3:

    As to failing uni, get over it and go do a course you are more suited to like surf studies or something of that ilk and stop taking places up for people that actually have the apitutude, drive and desire to better themselves.

    Cannot believe I actually just wrote a proper reply to this thread, I really must be bored!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    [QUOTE/]See thats where your wrong, you are very different. Despite your situation and experience, though it may feel like your attacker took every ounce of this from you, you kept your dignity, you did not stoop to what you see prostitutes doing. You have gone to university to try and create a future for yourself with prospects, if you were the same as these girls youd have thrown the towel in a long long time ago and be on street corners of a night, so you have no idea how strong you already are. I think that with a bit of counselling and certainly with your familys help (you need to talk to them or at least some of them) you can get through uni and get the future you deserve which will be VERY different to what you see those girls in porn vids doing, you will have the choice to keep those private elements in your life exactly that, private, and you will regain respect for yourself and provided you meet some decent ones you will gain your confidence back in men - there are some very good ones out there among the masses of awful ones!

    EDIT: may i add respect for yourself which should never have been lost, what happened to you was no fault of your own and you should not punish yourself for it, but sadly with events like these it is hard not to but as said by others PM me if you want further advice, im female if that helps [/QUOTE]

    In what way am I different from? its a myth that most women who are prostitutes do so because they want to. I have not been in their circle, but the truth is so far from it. Most of these women have been thru violent sexual episodes in their life (something I share in common with them) and just like how I feel like being promiscous and devaluing my body, they feel the same way too. the only difference is that I have probably been through a milder sexual abuse episode, than compared to them who have been extremely violent ones. I beleive that although all human beings have different personality, the bottom line is we are humans. Even animals dont have the kind of violent abusive humiliating sex that porn vids are about. then, by what logic is that act of self-will? I feel self-willed too everytime i hurt myself sexually, like a possessed demon within me who wants to ruin and destroy tht softness and tenderness feminity makes in me. But because there have been a part of my life before the rape, I can recall and compare the two and understand and draw from the massive differernce in my 'sexual feelings'. Most prostitues have endured abuse from early years of their life: they havent had the opportunity to 'discover' their inner-good self. So is it becasue that they have never had the opportunity to treated well in their life and therefore being the promiscous slut that become as a result, that they are different (less of a human) than me?
    My inner self wants to know why should my body be pardoned from continual abuse (now that my 'virtue' has been taken away by rape) and not for these women who have become prostitutes? You know, I say 'virtue' has been taken away from my body as I really 'feel' this (I can sense it) as clearly as someone can see the moon on a clear bright night. I can 'sense/feel' as if touch and see that something that has been taken away from me, something valuable, something I can never get back, something that i can only word as 'virtue' cos there's no more definitive word for it in the human dictionary.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    :nopity: :troll:
    I'm sorry but that is the image I get from this thread. Each of your posts have not changed my idea especially asking that guy to hang himself and that his mum should be ashamed for giving birth to him.
    You come across as attention-seeking and wanting people to qualify the way you treat your OWN body.
    So what if you watch porn there is nothing wrong with that.
    However, displays of wanting to punch yourself to physical numbness etc is really not one of a stable mind if it is true as well as your violent outbursts as pointed out above - it is these I would seek help for tbh.

    Perhaps if you stopped sleeping with men you wouldn't be promiscuous:eek: and even crazier don't let them pay you then you won't be a prostitute :eek3:

    As to failing uni, get over it and go do a course you are more suited to like surf studies or something of that ilk and stop taking places up for people that actually have the apitutude, drive and desire to better themselves.

    Cannot believe I actually just wrote a proper reply to this thread, I really must be bored!
    You neednt write just cos ur bored. Cos it's all pretty pointless wht u said. Why are both u and guy you take sides both anon? wht have u got to hide? Sounds something fishy there.
    Also, I have never said I slept with men cos I didnt. I 'feel' promiscous; I havent acted out my urges/feelings. Also, I dont take payment to have sex. Maybe you do? And maybe thats why you and your other anon buddy should just bugger off and find a place to **** each other and equal out payments? Good luck!
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    GTFO! you are the type of men who should be hanged and put to death straight away. I bet your mom regrets tht she ever gave you birth! good luck with thinking of women as promiscous whores. the truth is men are big time cowards-they cant accept the truth of Nature, that woman are holy and sacred and life-givers. Men are *******! thats what they are! Not all, but most (not an inherent trait, but a finely acquired one). And you are a perfect example of that!
    So now, get the **** of this thread you moronic male-scum-of the planet!
    Emotionally unstable much? YOU cant accept the truth of nature that you were once raped and you have to now move on from that.
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You neednt write just cos ur bored. Cos it's all pretty pointless wht u said. Why are both u and guy you take sides both anon? wht have u got to hide? Sounds something fishy there.
    Also, I have never said I slept with men cos I didnt. I 'feel' promiscous; I havent acted out my urges/feelings. Also, I dont take payment to have sex. Maybe you do? And maybe thats why you and your other anon buddy should just bugger off and find a place to **** each other and equal out payments? Good luck!
    Your outbursts are quite silly, I dont believe in demons but the way you think is so sickly and demonic that I cant think of a better explanation than that of a demon empowering inside you somehow.

    You speak of your feminity, your posts show no feminity inside you to the extent that you refer to yourself as a 'female human'. I aint arguing or going to advice you any further but I feel really really sorry for you. Sorry.

    p.s. Nope, I dont know the other anon!
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    hi all its me again. I just wanna say thank you to all who have asked me to pm them, or just come forward to help. a big thank you to all.I'll get in touch with (probs pm you soonish)....Its not a nice thing to say to others esp that i am a grown up woman, but i have been crying..just like that-not cos of any reason in particular.This is wht i really want to do with my life: stop it here(maybe kill it?)...stop it here somehow, and start it from where it fell apart. It was not right of me to allow my life to spiral out of control...on a final note, tsr may have a lot of people around to discuss things with, but maybe not any/enough with certain level of maturity/depth of understanding that i was expectng to come across. but nonetheless, thank you for coming forward to help. i will get in touch with some of you via pm.
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: August 11, 2009
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Have you ever participated in a Secret Santa?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.