Bear's Horoscope Blog Redux

Reply 20

the bear

OP

20

Original post by Obolinda

is it possible u could read my entire birth chart pls ??

i don't need to... the stars have already told me everything :h:

Original post by the bear

i don't need to... the stars have already told me everything :h:

what did she say?

Reply 22

the bear

OP

20

Original post by Obolinda

what did she say?

"your call is important to us ; please continue to hold and one of our colleagues will be with you as soon as possible"

"Hi i am Kayleigh from Stars4U... you sound like a Leo with the Moon rising on the cusp of Scorpio ?"

here are your highlights until the Summer Solstice:

i) Emotions:
sometimes you will be happy. Thursdays are especially good.

ii) Wealth:

in May you will find £10 in a cornfield

iii) Health:

rub a mixture of yoghurt and olive oil on your feet before going to bed

iv) Social:

you will meet some new friends on the Interwebs.

do not tell them your real name

v) Academic:

make sure you always write down the units

vi) Lurve:

as a Leo you are an animal in the bedroom. Your Scorpio aspects give you enhanced awareness of your partners' needs

Original post by the bear

"your call is important to us ; please continue to hold and one of our colleagues will be with you as soon as possible"

"Hi i am Kayleigh from Stars4U... you sound like a Leo with the Moon rising on the cusp of Scorpio ?"

here are your highlights until the Summer Solstice:

i) Emotions:
sometimes you will be happy. Thursdays are especially good.

ii) Wealth:

in May you will find £10 in a cornfield

iii) Health:

rub a mixture of yoghurt and olive oil on your feet before going to bed

iv) Social:

you will meet some new friends on the Interwebs.

do not tell them your real name

v) Academic:

make sure you always write down the units

vi) Lurve:

as a Leo you are an animal in the bedroom. Your Scorpio aspects give you enhanced awareness of your partners' needs

thanks for the insight x
much appreciated :yy:

Reply 24

the bear

OP

20

Original post by Obolinda

thanks for the insight x
much appreciated :yy:

it's just what The Stars are telling me :h:

Reply 25

Fullofsurprises

20

Bear I am casting the TSR Tarot (TM) and I'm getting an image that your future contains not just many more puns but also some witty interventions on other threads. In general it suggests you are spending far too much time online.

Sorry if I have given away too much as I know people don't always like to know the future. :sad:

Reply 26

The_Lonely_Goatherd

20

Original post by Fullofsurprises

Bear I am casting the TSR Tarot (TM) and I'm getting an image that your future contains not just many more puns but also some witty interventions on other threads. In general it suggests you are spending far too much time online.

Sorry if I have given away too much as I know people don't always like to know the future. :sad:

Reply 27

the bear

OP

20

Original post by Fullofsurprises

Bear I am casting the TSR Tarot (TM) and I'm getting an image that your future contains not just many more puns but also some witty interventions on other threads. In general it suggests you are spending far too much time online.

Sorry if I have given away too much as I know people don't always like to know the future. :sad:

as long as i don't get the Banned Man card i am happy :h:

Reply 28

Fullofsurprises

20

Original post by the bear

as long as i don't get the Banned Man card i am happy :h:

There was just this big star hovering over the Joker and some furry dude.

Reply 29

EOData

16

I am both an Aries and born in the Chinese year of the dragon. As I sit here trying not to singe my yellow balaclava, can you give me any advice for what should be my successful technique this year for getting rodents out of exam halls? And does it matter if they are Librans?

Reply 30

the bear

OP

20

Original post by EOData

I am both an Aries and born in the Chinese year of the dragon. As I sit here trying not to singe my yellow balaclava, can you give me any advice for what should be my successful technique this year for getting rodents out of exam halls? And does it matter if they are Librans?

Kayleigh from Stars4U says "you have exceeded your free star time... any further Celestial Information will be charged at $5.99 per minute or part thereof".

Reply 31

Lean480D

1

Original post by the bear

Prognostications for Spring 2022!!
Stardate 10042022AD: 1730 update

Aries 21/03 - 20/04
If you must wear a balaclava at least let it be yellow

Lucky Poet: Keats

Taurus 21/04 - 21/05
Drink plenty of water and don't scratch it

Lucky Poet: Plath

Gemini 22/05 - 22/06
Without any fingerprint evidence the case against you will collapse

Lucky Poet: Yeats

Cancer 23/06 - 23/07
Don't worry, in the Gambia it is considered a sign of good fortune

Lucky Poet: cummings

Leo 24/07 - 23/08
Cilvēks, kurš tev ir pievīlis, paaugstināsies tavā cieņā, un tu viņā atklāsi lieliskas īpašības, par kurām tu pat nenojauta. Redziet, cik grūti ir kādu labi pazīt!

Laimīgs dzejnieks: Pam Ayres

Virgo 24/08 - 23/09
Lammaane ahaan, wax walba wali si qumman uma noqon doonaan, laakiin waxaad ku xisaabtami kartaa Venus inay iftiimiso noloshaada guurka. Sidoo kale, Mars waxay xoojin doontaa rabitaankaaga xaaskaaga. Qulqulka qallafsan ee Mercury wuxuu ka dhigi doonaa dad badan oo aan guursan inay lumiyaan maskaxdooda. Xeerarka ciyaarta jacaylka ayaa kaa baxsan doona, waxaadna halis u tahay inaad ku garaacdo baadiyaha muddo dheer. Waxa laga yaabaa in hindisayaashu ka gaabiyaan yoolkii la rabay.

Abwaan nasiib badan: Belloc

Libra 24/09 - 23/10
Ho tondraka amin'ny feo sy ny fahavitrihana ianao. Ankoatra izany, dia handray soa avy amin'ny fanoherana ara-batana sy ara-moraly tsara ianao. Mazava ho azy fa raha manaiky ny fitaoman'i Jupiter ianao, izay hamporisika anao hihoatra, dia mety hanana olana ara-pahasalamana haingana kokoa noho ny eritreretinao.

poeta tsara vintana: Dylan Thomas

Scorpio 24/10 - 22/11
Give your fidget spinners to the poor

Lucky Poet: Chaucer

Sagittarius 23/11 - 21/12
Applying cold kefir internally often helps

Lucky Poet: Rimbaud

Capricorn 22/12 - 20/01
As long as you did not tell her your real name you will be fine

Lucky Poet: Dante

Aquarius 21/01 - 19/02
Pikiran Anda akan dipenuhi dengan ide-ide orisinal dan proyek-proyek baru. Tetapi untuk memberi mereka bentuk, Anda perlu membangun dialog dengan rekan kerja Anda dan bahkan atasan Anda. Jangan ragu-ragu ; berkat dukungan Saturnus, semua yang Anda usulkan akan memiliki setiap kesempatan untuk disetujui

Penyair yang beruntung: Heine

Pisces 20/02 - 20/03
Við og samstarfsaðilar okkar geymum og fáum aðgang að óviðkvæmum upplýsingum á tækinu þínu, svo sem vafrakökur eða einstaka auðkenni tækisins, og vinnum úr persónulegum gögnum þínum eins og IP tölu þinni eða vafrakökuauðkenni, til gagnavinnslu eins og til að birta sérsniðnar auglýsingar, mælingar á óskum gesta okkar o.s.frv.
Þú getur valið hér og breytt kjörstillingum þínum hvenær sem er í persónuverndarstefnu okkar á þessari vefsíðu. Sumir samstarfsaðilar biðja ekki um samþykki þitt til að vinna úr gögnum þínum og treysta á lögmæta viðskiptahagsmuni sína. Þú getur mótmælt þessari gagnavinnslu með því að smella á „Finn út meira“. Ásamt samstarfsaðilum okkar vinnum við eftirfarandi gögn á grundvelli samþykkis þíns og/eða lögmætra hagsmuna: Persónulegar auglýsingar og efni, árangursmælingar á auglýsingum og efni, áhorfendagögn og vöruþróun, nákvæm landstaðsetningargögn og auðkenning með tækjagreiningu“

Heppið skáld: Shakespeare

I don't understand...

Reply 32

the bear

OP

20