I've just lost £3000 because of my mental health (social anxiety)
So I'm currently in L.A. and am flying back tomorrow. This wasn't the plan. I was supposed to be meeting a tour groul this morn and spending three more weeks here. The trip cost me £3000. Anyway, I have been feeling extremely anxious about the trip but one of the reasons I booked it was to prove to myself that I wouldn't let it control me. However it seems it can.
So I woke up this morning to get ready to meet them downstairs at 7.30 am. Then it just hit me - I'm spending a week with these people and I won't have any time to myself. I freaked out, started breaking down and then I didn't want to go and when that gets in my head there's no stopping me. For me, social anxiety comes from a feeling of being trapped if anything. So unable to be alone. My social anxiety is almost like introversion taken too far.
So here I am. 3000 down. Trying to ignore that fact but it is the main thing bothering me now. Went to hospital here, to try and get a note to help a health insurance claim. They didn't give me a note as such but a discharge form with my symptoms. They also gave me some benzos. Hallelujah! I had been wanting these from my gp for weeks prior to travel cos I knew they would help but she never even mentioned them.
Thing is, I'm 99% sure that my health insurance company won't see anxiety and panic attacks as a valid reason for me to get even a little money back. This bothers mw because if they had personally witnessed how I have been then they would understand it is very debilitating.
Anyway, I just feel low. My anxiety has gone now that the social threat has disappeared but I'm felt with sadness and disappointment. My anxiety has won. Again.
I had a wonderful day exploring l.a on my own, I really did. I just wish I never booked the stupid tours in the first place.
I don't know what I'm asking. The thought that so much money has gone down the drain is making it harder for me. How can I ignore this?
Looking for replies from people who actually understand social anxiety. Not idiots who will tell me to get over it without realising it's not something you just get over.
TLDR: social anxiety made me cancel a £3000 trip and beat me again. Ffs.
Posted from TSR Mobile
So I woke up this morning to get ready to meet them downstairs at 7.30 am. Then it just hit me - I'm spending a week with these people and I won't have any time to myself. I freaked out, started breaking down and then I didn't want to go and when that gets in my head there's no stopping me. For me, social anxiety comes from a feeling of being trapped if anything. So unable to be alone. My social anxiety is almost like introversion taken too far.
So here I am. 3000 down. Trying to ignore that fact but it is the main thing bothering me now. Went to hospital here, to try and get a note to help a health insurance claim. They didn't give me a note as such but a discharge form with my symptoms. They also gave me some benzos. Hallelujah! I had been wanting these from my gp for weeks prior to travel cos I knew they would help but she never even mentioned them.
Thing is, I'm 99% sure that my health insurance company won't see anxiety and panic attacks as a valid reason for me to get even a little money back. This bothers mw because if they had personally witnessed how I have been then they would understand it is very debilitating.
Anyway, I just feel low. My anxiety has gone now that the social threat has disappeared but I'm felt with sadness and disappointment. My anxiety has won. Again.
I had a wonderful day exploring l.a on my own, I really did. I just wish I never booked the stupid tours in the first place.
I don't know what I'm asking. The thought that so much money has gone down the drain is making it harder for me. How can I ignore this?
Looking for replies from people who actually understand social anxiety. Not idiots who will tell me to get over it without realising it's not something you just get over.
TLDR: social anxiety made me cancel a £3000 trip and beat me again. Ffs.
Posted from TSR Mobile
