depression, in year 13

Hiya, I totally understand your situation having been through similar things myself. One piece of advice I would really like to give you is this- going to university, changing where you live/who you live with, will not, NOT get rid of your depression. Its a common thing for people with depression to think- that if they just leave the life they have now and go do/be something new, everything will improve. This is not true, and I would definitely recommend that you sort your head out best you can before you go to uni- even if that means taking some time out

Good luck

This a million times over. I left home and went to uni. Tried to study and dropped out twice. I don't regret the choices I've made because I live in a wonderful city and have amazing friends but nothing's helped my depression.

Hiya, I totally understand your situation having been through similar things myself. One piece of advice I would really like to give you is this- going to university, changing where you live/who you live with, will not, NOT get rid of your depression. Its a common thing for people with depression to think- that if they just leave the life they have now and go do/be something new, everything will improve. This is not true, and I would definitely recommend that you sort your head out best you can before you go to uni- even if that means taking some time out

Good luck

Why did you drop it out of university? Did you miss your family or was you really depressed. But having amazing friends surely does help it a tiny bit though


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Because I'm ill and I couldn't cope with studying. I've currently got a big form to fill in to see whether I'm eligible for ESA as I can't work either. Yeah, I've got a good network of supportive friends but that's not going to cure my illness.

Oh ok hopefully you will get better in the future. what triggered your depression?


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Nothing. It's a very ignorant view to think all depression must be caused by some life event. I'm ill. It's probably a chemical imbalance in my brain and it's most likely genetic. You wouldn't ask someone with a physical disability what 'triggered' it so why is it OK to ask that about mental illness?

Well that's what everybody asks me so I assumed that it was the typical thing to ask. Sorry that's actually quite an important point you pointed out I'll be more careful next time


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for months I have been feeling like s**t. I'm just so bored and don't do anything and don't have anyone to do anything with. the hours just go by so slow and I just countdown to when its like 10-11pm so I can go to sleep. apart from 1 friend I don't really have anyone that I can go into a deep conversation about it and even talking to my friend doesn't help me either and I don't think talking to a counsellor will help either. as I am 17 my parents will probably have to be involved in everything and i just don't want to have to worry about them aswell as myself. i am even more stressed out because i want to do well at my A-levels so i can go to uni this September. i achieved really good grades in my AS's and wanted to repeat the same success but i just have no energy to revise. i used to be so happy and care free at school with people in my year group (although i do not speak/see any of them outside of school) but now i just feel like isolating myself from everyone and just listening to my headphones. i just get upset randomly and tears come out of my eyes. my parents are going through a divorce which has made it worse but i was depressed long before this. i also do not live with any older siblings so have no one to talk about this with. i did see my school counsellor a few years ago but it wasn't helpful as i wasn't feeling as bad as i was now. i just keep thinking that i want time to go by fast and when i think i am at the beginning of my life i.e. uni, travel, social life, relationships etc it just makes me want curl up in a big ball and cry because it all seems like it will take too much time and effort and i just cant be bothered for any of it. i have never taken any medication for depression, well i haven't seen a doctor about it to be prescribed anything and don't want to see a doctor atm as i don't want to get my family involved etc because my parents see the same GP as me. i am planning on waiting till i move to university so i can see the counsellor there as it will be away from my family and i will feel like i can open up about it. there isn't anything that has happened to trigger this, although i do think it is genetic as my dad is depressed even though he doesn't admit it but i can tell but he's like 40 years older than me, i shouldn't be feeling like this at 17! if i talk to my mum about it she just says its a teenage thing and it'll pass but i know its more than that. last year i had a really bad holiday abroad and had to go on the drip there and here several times etc and the year before that there was a massive family argument when my family came over. i do believe i was depressed before these 2 events but it has all built up and i have no idea how to get myself through in the meantime until i start university. i am hoping that a change or residence and people will improve my depression but sadly i have a feeling that it wont because i love my parents dearly. sorry for the very long message! not something that can really be condensed!

Hm... Sometimes its a chain reaction, just start talking more to people and see where it goes from there

(talk to me 👀 jkjk)

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I went through a very similar experience last year, this year I still feel its impacts, its insidious. A little voice telling you that you can't. You're too tired, its too hard and that there's no point.

I don't know if this is the best way, and it sounds very weird. But every time i thought to myself that I couldn't, I told myself there was no option, I needed to. If not, everything I wanted would just disappear.

To be perfectly honest, the inner confliction nearly killed me. I did have to see a counselor, if you can don't go to a school one. See your doctor about it.

I can't say its the best way, but its how I got through it.

Sorry to hear that you're in a horrible place ATM. You'd be surprised how many people go through the same thing at 17 years old, if not younger. It does get better, but with everything that's going on around you, I guess it can be too easy to think that there's no getting out, but I can promise you it will eventually.

I can actually recommend that you see your GP about this. Even though you are 17, he/she would still be bound by confidentiality rules to not tell your parents as long as you request it, as long as you're not harming anybody by not telling. Also, your GP would probably give better advice than the well-meaning people of TSR.

I have something like this currently. I went to see my doctor about it and we talked about stuff I was going though. This might not be the case for you but for me, she said she didn't think I was depressed, but she said I need to try to go out more and do more (without my parents telling me to), just little things. Eg walk the dog, go shopping, etc. I'm going back to see her in a few weeks to talk about if it's helping at all, if not then we'll have to think of other things. It did feel good to talk to someone about it though, so even if your situation is different to mine, I would still go to your doctor, they can see what might me wrong/possibly diagnose, you can talk to someone about whats wrong, and they might be able to help find a way to make life better.
Personally I think once I go to uni in September things might look up a bit, new friends, new course, new place, independence, more things to do, etc etc. Maybe think about that if it helps?
If you want to talk, just tell me and I will PM you

Thank you, yeh I'm also trying to think about going uni this September and making friends etc but part of me worries that I'm making uni out to be something which is isn't and I end up making no friends and doing nothing there either. I have tried going out despite my mind telling me I don't want to, I went out with my dad today, the main reason was I needed new shoes so it was compulsory not optional and even though I'm a very confident person I just felt as very anxious as if everybody was staring at me or something. I know going to a GP will help but I just can't be bothered with the hassle. I'm not at a severe stage so for now I think I can manage myself.


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