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I feel like a complete waste of life

Hey, I'm 23 (a guy)

I just feel like a complete waste of life. I just get really upset at times because I feel like I've never done anything with my life.

- Jobs. I really want to go into photography/media/TV but I've never been successful. I keep writing to places but they never get back to my application/email or they send the usual "you don't have enough experience". It just annoys me so much because lots of places want you to have experience first but places won't offer you the experience. I went to University and got a 2:1 in graphic design/photography but it's not got me anywhere :frown: I work in retail. I enjoy working with the people but I just don't want to do retail.

- Driving. I've never learnt to Drive. I'm 23 and I still can't drive. I tried starting to Drive last year but the driving instructor put me off. I managed 6 lessons but I just got so nervous. At the end of every lesson, I'd be sweating and bright red in the face with stress. I'd get so nervous that I'd stall sometimes and he'd shake his head or tut. I thought he did that just to encourage me but everyone told me to stop with him. But now I've not got the confidence.

- Friends. A friend once said to me i'm not "a lad". I was always quite a shy guy. I've become more confident over the last year or so but it got to me. I felt I was being called boring. I don't like football so i'm not sure if that's why? But it just brought my confidence down. I don't have loads of friends and I just worry it's because I'm boring.

- Looks. All throughout school I was bullied for my height. I'm 5'8" now so average? but I still feel short. Years later, it's just getting to me still because I know like girls always like taller guys. Plus I've got such sensitive skin and I look like a right scruffy mess. I've tried different creams, gels, shavers and nothing works. People say i'm good looking/handsome but I just look in the mirror and don't see that.

- Girlfriend. I've never had a girlfriend. Or boyfriend. I'm bi and too afraid to tell anyone. I'm fed up of being on my own. I just want someone's hand to hold or someone to hug after a bad day or to just be able to say "i love you" to someone.

I'm just really fed up. I have nothing going for me. I can't get a job I like, I don't have much of a social life, I have to get buses, I think I look like crap and I just have no one.

I know there are a lot worse things happening to people in this World but I just feel so lonely and upset. I'm not an ungrateful person. I just want to make my life happier but I don't know how to and I just feel like "why bother" at the moment :frown: I don't want to do anything silly. thank you x
I'm a 3rd year graphic design student. What's your portfolio like?
Is this perhaps due to mental health issues? If you feel that way, then maybe consider seeing your gp?
Original post by 2scotty
Hey, I'm 23 (a guy)

I just feel like a complete waste of life. I just get really upset at times because I feel like I've never done anything with my life.

- Jobs. I really want to go into photography/media/TV but I've never been successful. I keep writing to places but they never get back to my application/email or they send the usual "you don't have enough experience". It just annoys me so much because lots of places want you to have experience first but places won't offer you the experience. I went to University and got a 2:1 in graphic design/photography but it's not got me anywhere :frown: I work in retail. I enjoy working with the people but I just don't want to do retail.

- Driving. I've never learnt to Drive. I'm 23 and I still can't drive. I tried starting to Drive last year but the driving instructor put me off. I managed 6 lessons but I just got so nervous. At the end of every lesson, I'd be sweating and bright red in the face with stress. I'd get so nervous that I'd stall sometimes and he'd shake his head or tut. I thought he did that just to encourage me but everyone told me to stop with him. But now I've not got the confidence.

- Friends. A friend once said to me i'm not "a lad". I was always quite a shy guy. I've become more confident over the last year or so but it got to me. I felt I was being called boring. I don't like football so i'm not sure if that's why? But it just brought my confidence down. I don't have loads of friends and I just worry it's because I'm boring.

- Looks. All throughout school I was bullied for my height. I'm 5'8" now so average? but I still feel short. Years later, it's just getting to me still because I know like girls always like taller guys. Plus I've got such sensitive skin and I look like a right scruffy mess. I've tried different creams, gels, shavers and nothing works. People say i'm good looking/handsome but I just look in the mirror and don't see that.

- Girlfriend. I've never had a girlfriend. Or boyfriend. I'm bi and too afraid to tell anyone. I'm fed up of being on my own. I just want someone's hand to hold or someone to hug after a bad day or to just be able to say "i love you" to someone.

I'm just really fed up. I have nothing going for me. I can't get a job I like, I don't have much of a social life, I have to get buses, I think I look like crap and I just have no one.

I know there are a lot worse things happening to people in this World but I just feel so lonely and upset. I'm not an ungrateful person. I just want to make my life happier but I don't know how to and I just feel like "why bother" at the moment :frown: I don't want to do anything silly. thank you x


I have no advice for you I'm afraid except getting more industry relevant experience but it sounds like your down on yourself quite a lot :console: :console: Its not good to feel that way about yourself and your driving instructor sounded bad. A good one wouldnt put you down.
Original post by 2scotty
Hey, I'm 23 (a guy)

I just feel like a complete waste of life. I just get really upset at times because I feel like I've never done anything with my life.

- Jobs. I really want to go into photography/media/TV but I've never been successful. I keep writing to places but they never get back to my application/email or they send the usual "you don't have enough experience". It just annoys me so much because lots of places want you to have experience first but places won't offer you the experience. I went to University and got a 2:1 in graphic design/photography but it's not got me anywhere :frown: I work in retail. I enjoy working with the people but I just don't want to do retail.

- Driving. I've never learnt to Drive. I'm 23 and I still can't drive. I tried starting to Drive last year but the driving instructor put me off. I managed 6 lessons but I just got so nervous. At the end of every lesson, I'd be sweating and bright red in the face with stress. I'd get so nervous that I'd stall sometimes and he'd shake his head or tut. I thought he did that just to encourage me but everyone told me to stop with him. But now I've not got the confidence.

- Friends. A friend once said to me i'm not "a lad". I was always quite a shy guy. I've become more confident over the last year or so but it got to me. I felt I was being called boring. I don't like football so i'm not sure if that's why? But it just brought my confidence down. I don't have loads of friends and I just worry it's because I'm boring.

- Looks. All throughout school I was bullied for my height. I'm 5'8" now so average? but I still feel short. Years later, it's just getting to me still because I know like girls always like taller guys. Plus I've got such sensitive skin and I look like a right scruffy mess. I've tried different creams, gels, shavers and nothing works. People say i'm good looking/handsome but I just look in the mirror and don't see that.

- Girlfriend. I've never had a girlfriend. Or boyfriend. I'm bi and too afraid to tell anyone. I'm fed up of being on my own. I just want someone's hand to hold or someone to hug after a bad day or to just be able to say "i love you" to someone.

I'm just really fed up. I have nothing going for me. I can't get a job I like, I don't have much of a social life, I have to get buses, I think I look like crap and I just have no one.

I know there are a lot worse things happening to people in this World but I just feel so lonely and upset. I'm not an ungrateful person. I just want to make my life happier but I don't know how to and I just feel like "why bother" at the moment :frown: I don't want to do anything silly. thank you x



Hi :smile: I cried multiple times in front of my driving instructor and I took me quite a while to learn how to drive properly. Those lessons were incredibly stressful for me, so I understand you perfectly! But I suggest you trying again, just keep this in mind: endure the stress for a few months and then you won't have to see the instructor ever again :smile: The experience will also give you more confidence

You don't have to like football to have friends! Maybe you should try something new like a hobby or sport, something to put your energies into. You will meet new people and it will help you grow as a person :smile:

Maybe coming out to even one person will make you feel better. I think that it could be a great first step :smile:

5 ft 8 is perfectly fine! Forget about the bullies, they just needed something to pick on and they chose your height. Bullies are very insicure about themselves and just want to move the attention to someone who is not them. They can pick on every little thing. Also, you are still a "taller guy" to a good numer of girls
For your skin you could try doing some research on natural products. Normally it's what works best

Do things one step and the time and you'll see your life improving! I'm absolutely not an expert in these things but I can garantee you that there are many people like you and me who sometimes feel like crap about themselves, you're not alone :smile:
All of the above you have listed are achievable for you. Take that mindset. Start working on one thing at a time, putting all your efforts in to that one thing you want to achieve, and by this time next year I promise you will have ticked most of them off. Right now you think changing your life is not a possibility, but you need to be open to looking at things differently.

Loneliness goes hand in hand with that feeling of, why bother. Find opportunities to do something. A walk, going to the cinema, to the coffee shop, start a part time course, join local clubs. Know that lonliness is transient and will not be forever, and is often is an over exaggeration of the reality by your mind by perceptions of others.

I'm 28, and discovered this only a year ago, but i've found that practicing mindfulness has really helped me, and stopped me focussing on the negatives. I'd recommend giving it a try and see if it works for you. Lots of material online about it, and it's very simple.

We are all more similar than you think. You aren't alone. X

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