How to not have regrets
I know it's totally normal to have regrets but I don't mean like normal regrets over things like not asking someone on a date or not applying for a job. I mean like little things like regretting not saying something or like regretting how you waved at someone. Stuff like that that are so insignificant, how do I stop thinking about them. I'm sick of worrying about things I can't control
Keep working on it. I used to worry a lot more than I do now. Those small things are not important.
Ask yourself if the things that you are regretting now are something that you would care about on your deathbed. Try and distract your mind if it starts to worry about something unimportant.
Ask yourself if the things that you are regretting now are something that you would care about on your deathbed. Try and distract your mind if it starts to worry about something unimportant.
Original post by MWorldwide19
I know it's totally normal to have regrets but I don't mean like normal regrets over things like not asking someone on a date or not applying for a job. I mean like little things like regretting not saying something or like regretting how you waved at someone. Stuff like that that are so insignificant, how do I stop thinking about them. I'm sick of worrying about things I can't control
Hi,
I completely understand where you are coming from. Many people experience these kinds of seemingly insignificant regrets from time to time. Based on the example you have provided, it sounds to me like social regrets. While they can be persistent, as their source is our thoughts, affections, and beliefs, it is not impossible to manage them. I will tell you right away that you need to be patient and determined, but you can work towards removing social regrets from your life.
Most often, they are the consequence of either the fear of being rejected or not being accepted, or both
These feelings are in our head, so to deal with this problem, we need to change certain aspects of our thinking.1. You need to recognise that nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes, including minor social lapses. That is the beauty of our human nature. The only person who can judge you is yourself, and the only person that can painfully reject you is you.
2. That leads me to my second point. Accept and start loving yourself. You will never feel enough unless you proudly and confidently say: "I like, enjoy, and love myself!" Replace self-criticism with self-compassion. Be a friend to yourself
3. Whenever you catch yourself making social regrets, stop for a second. Ask yourself whether there is any reason to blame yourself and tear up the past. The next question is, does it have any impact on your life at all? Try to reframe your thoughts and even reward yourself with something pleasurable when you achieve success.
If these thoughts are causing significant distress or interfering with your daily life, consider speaking to a GP or directly with a counsellor. Remember that your mental health is as important as your physical health
I hope you will find that helpful! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions
You can also chat with me and other student ambassadors through The Ambassador Platform.Take care,
Julia
Psychology student
De Montfort University
Original post by De Montfort University
Hi,
I completely understand where you are coming from. Many people experience these kinds of seemingly insignificant regrets from time to time. Based on the example you have provided, it sounds to me like social regrets. While they can be persistent, as their source is our thoughts, affections, and beliefs, it is not impossible to manage them. I will tell you right away that you need to be patient and determined, but you can work towards removing social regrets from your life.
Most often, they are the consequence of either the fear of being rejected or not being accepted, or both These feelings are in our head, so to deal with this problem, we need to change certain aspects of our thinking.
1. You need to recognise that nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes, including minor social lapses. That is the beauty of our human nature. The only person who can judge you is yourself, and the only person that can painfully reject you is you.
2. That leads me to my second point. Accept and start loving yourself. You will never feel enough unless you proudly and confidently say: "I like, enjoy, and love myself!" Replace self-criticism with self-compassion. Be a friend to yourself
3. Whenever you catch yourself making social regrets, stop for a second. Ask yourself whether there is any reason to blame yourself and tear up the past. The next question is, does it have any impact on your life at all? Try to reframe your thoughts and even reward yourself with something pleasurable when you achieve success.
If these thoughts are causing significant distress or interfering with your daily life, consider speaking to a GP or directly with a counsellor. Remember that your mental health is as important as your physical health
I hope you will find that helpful! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions You can also chat with me and other student ambassadors through The Ambassador Platform.
Take care,
Julia
Psychology student
De Montfort University
Hi,
I completely understand where you are coming from. Many people experience these kinds of seemingly insignificant regrets from time to time. Based on the example you have provided, it sounds to me like social regrets. While they can be persistent, as their source is our thoughts, affections, and beliefs, it is not impossible to manage them. I will tell you right away that you need to be patient and determined, but you can work towards removing social regrets from your life.
Most often, they are the consequence of either the fear of being rejected or not being accepted, or both
These feelings are in our head, so to deal with this problem, we need to change certain aspects of our thinking.1. You need to recognise that nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes, including minor social lapses. That is the beauty of our human nature. The only person who can judge you is yourself, and the only person that can painfully reject you is you.
2. That leads me to my second point. Accept and start loving yourself. You will never feel enough unless you proudly and confidently say: "I like, enjoy, and love myself!" Replace self-criticism with self-compassion. Be a friend to yourself
3. Whenever you catch yourself making social regrets, stop for a second. Ask yourself whether there is any reason to blame yourself and tear up the past. The next question is, does it have any impact on your life at all? Try to reframe your thoughts and even reward yourself with something pleasurable when you achieve success.
If these thoughts are causing significant distress or interfering with your daily life, consider speaking to a GP or directly with a counsellor. Remember that your mental health is as important as your physical health
I hope you will find that helpful! Feel free to reach out if you have any questions
You can also chat with me and other student ambassadors through The Ambassador Platform.Take care,
Julia
Psychology student
De Montfort University
Thank you for being so kind! This was incredibly helpful, will definitely start implementing these steps from now on
