Anxiety experiences and support
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Original post by maxcartwright
just had my first citalopram and about half an hour later started feelng very sick and nauseous, i wasnt sick though. i hope this is just a side effect.
does anyone else have this problem with food? I always feel nervous when I eat because the thought of being ill makes me panic. hopefully the medicine will help.
sorry about the random post, needed to tell someone
does anyone else have this problem with food? I always feel nervous when I eat because the thought of being ill makes me panic. hopefully the medicine will help.
sorry about the random post, needed to tell someone
I've just started Citalopram to I feel sick and tired with it all the time and little faint my doctor said it was a side effect and dont worry.
Original post by maxcartwright
would anyone here ever apply to a quiet place to deal with anxiety? Im in london for uni, but am going to drop out and reapply. I was wondering if bieng in a more relaxed environment eg st andrews would help.
I'm thinking about dropping out and going to cumbria uni next year at the moment i'm at edinburgh but if I went to cumbria its quieter and I can live with my parents and get myself well.
Original post by LunaBuna
I'm thinking about dropping out and going to cumbria uni next year at the moment i'm at edinburgh but if I went to cumbria its quieter and I can live with my parents and get myself well.
thanks
how is edinburgh? I was considering it as well for politics.
I'm at Edinburgh Napier I wouldnt recommend it at all its unorgnised and my tutors not the kindest of people she still hasent replyed to me yet I sent her a message on monday about how I'm taking time off due to my issues playing up I have feeling shes gonna yell at me when i get back and I think its the course thats making me feel worse you know?
But edinburgh itself is amazing city it dosent feel very big at all you get used to it really fast and if your anxious or upset its great because you can run off and walk around the city for hours thats what I do when i'm there I think once I'm well and ready to move I might move to edinburgh...because I love it
But edinburgh itself is amazing city it dosent feel very big at all you get used to it really fast and if your anxious or upset its great because you can run off and walk around the city for hours thats what I do when i'm there I think once I'm well and ready to move I might move to edinburgh...because I love it
Original post by Riku
You're not going to get unfit. Listen to me - I have never been to a gym, I never do any organised exercise, I walk to college each day and that is it. And I am neither fat, nor hideously unfit. You are OK. Sorry about the sleep thing, but I feel for you 
Maybe you could try taking some time off or try being stricter on how long and when you allow yourself online? But only if you think it genuinely could help, if it would end up causing you more stress and worry then obviously don't do it.
In what way are you running away from how you feel? You are on here telling us, right?
I know that I should be content with just walking, but it really feels like I need the ability to get a good workout for the feel-good factor (not to mention the sleep). It's alright when I'm doing brisk, power-walking style for a few miles but don't really get the same effect going to uni (possibly these bags weighing me down whch can't really be helped). Apart from that I've obviously got an unhealthy and self-destructive relationship with food which is probably causing my weight to yo-yo and is definitely making me overpanic (yesterday I drank too much wine at my aunt's, had loads of spaghetti with some Parmesan and then this big rich chocolate mousse which I'd normally never do but it was just ahhh so good-then couldn't get to sleep until 4 because I started having chest pains and thinking I'd die of hgh blood pressure/stroke/heart attack etc.)
But all this worry and fear's making me lose enjoyment in uni and get irritable and depressed. I 'm definitely retreating onto this laptop or the computer sometimes to hide from my pain so that's got to be sorted. I've been getting suicidal thoughts again all morning and it's took loads of mates dropping in a message on my Facebook to snap me out of it.
Tbh I'm not entirely sure I want to live sometimes, I definitely don't want to live with this fear and anger anymore, but nor do I want to hurt those I love when they're doing so much for me and I know if I've got out before, there's a way out of this mess again to a better life. Thanks
Maybe you could try taking some time off or try being stricter on how long and when you allow yourself online? But only if you think it genuinely could help, if it would end up causing you more stress and worry then obviously don't do it.
In what way are you running away from how you feel? You are on here telling us, right?
I know that I should be content with just walking, but it really feels like I need the ability to get a good workout for the feel-good factor (not to mention the sleep). It's alright when I'm doing brisk, power-walking style for a few miles but don't really get the same effect going to uni (possibly these bags weighing me down whch can't really be helped). Apart from that I've obviously got an unhealthy and self-destructive relationship with food which is probably causing my weight to yo-yo and is definitely making me overpanic (yesterday I drank too much wine at my aunt's, had loads of spaghetti with some Parmesan and then this big rich chocolate mousse which I'd normally never do but it was just ahhh so good-then couldn't get to sleep until 4 because I started having chest pains and thinking I'd die of hgh blood pressure/stroke/heart attack etc.)
But all this worry and fear's making me lose enjoyment in uni and get irritable and depressed. I 'm definitely retreating onto this laptop or the computer sometimes to hide from my pain so that's got to be sorted. I've been getting suicidal thoughts again all morning and it's took loads of mates dropping in a message on my Facebook to snap me out of it.
Tbh I'm not entirely sure I want to live sometimes, I definitely don't want to live with this fear and anger anymore, but nor do I want to hurt those I love when they're doing so much for me and I know if I've got out before, there's a way out of this mess again to a better life. Thanks
I completely understand the irrational fears, brought on by all manner of things. And I can relate to general food issues, although mine are different to yours but I still see where you're coming from.
Maybe if the sleep is a real problem you could consider some medication or even just a herbal remedy? You can get lots of stuff like that over-the-counter I think.
As I said, I think that going on the computer to help yourself feel better is only a bad thing if it is having negative effects. If it genuinely does just improve your mood and calm you down a bit, then why bother with the added stress of trying to 'stop' yourself from using it, when it's mostly just a good thing?
I don't think I'll say much about the suicidal thoughts. I feel I don't know you well enough to say the right things (like your friends *do*, who love you), and I don't want to say the wrong things.
Like you yourself said, you don't want to live with these feelings anymore, but try to remember it *is* possible to live, and live without them. It might take time, and it might be hard, but it's ALWAYS worth carrying on, because you never know, tomorrow might be the day when you wake up feeling different.
i just got a message from my seminar tutor about all the ones i've missed. due to anxiety/depression and starting new medicine (side effects include vomiting and dizziness) I havent been to any since I started uni. I told my personal tutor and he said that all lecturers would be told about the problem, and he was really nice about it, but does that mean I have to go to the seminars?
am considering dropping out and reapplying for next year. need some time to sort myself out
Original post by maxcartwright i just got a message from my seminar tutor about all the ones i've missed. due to anxiety/depression and starting new medicine (side effects include vomiting and dizziness) I havent been to any since I started uni.
I told my personal tutor and he said that all lecturers would be told about the problem, and he was really nice about it, but does that mean I have to go to the seminars?
am considering dropping out and reapplying for next year. need some time to sort myself out
i just got a message from my seminar tutor about all the ones i've missed. due to anxiety/depression and starting new medicine (side effects include vomiting and dizziness) I havent been to any since I started uni. I told my personal tutor and he said that all lecturers would be told about the problem, and he was really nice about it, but does that mean I have to go to the seminars?
am considering dropping out and reapplying for next year. need some time to sort myself out
Speak to your tutor before you make any rash decisions. If you don't feel up to going to certain things, then make sure he is aware of that and he can help you decide whether it's right for you to stay or to wait a year.
Original post by Amwazicles
Speak to your tutor before you make any rash decisions. If you don't feel up to going to certain things, then make sure he is aware of that and he can help you decide whether it's right for you to stay or to wait a year.
thanks
I do want to drop out. i wanted to take a gap year anyway and im not on the course i want. i got better than expected a levels so i would hopefully get on the course i wanted if i reapplied and i could use the time out the sort this anxiety stuff. just started on some new medicine which is bleh
problem is that its a good course at a good uni, but I cant keep up or do any of the work and i dont enjoy it. i dont want to look back at the end of 3 years and regret it
I'm convinced I'm gonna enter cardiac arrest from potassium overdose. Got even more anxious considering I've been having stuff full of it like bananas, oranges, raisins and honey pretty much every day since the beginning of recovery. If I get scared to eat fruit again then I'm pretty screwed. If anyone can help that'd be nice please.
/uni panic
/uni panic
Original post by maxcartwright
thanks
I do want to drop out. i wanted to take a gap year anyway and im not on the course i want. i got better than expected a levels so i would hopefully get on the course i wanted if i reapplied and i could use the time out the sort this anxiety stuff. just started on some new medicine which is bleh
problem is that its a good course at a good uni, but I cant keep up or do any of the work and i dont enjoy it. i dont want to look back at the end of 3 years and regret it
I do want to drop out. i wanted to take a gap year anyway and im not on the course i want. i got better than expected a levels so i would hopefully get on the course i wanted if i reapplied and i could use the time out the sort this anxiety stuff. just started on some new medicine which is bleh
problem is that its a good course at a good uni, but I cant keep up or do any of the work and i dont enjoy it. i dont want to look back at the end of 3 years and regret it
Well, I guess if you want to drop it and genuinely think you'd be happier, then it's your choice.
Good luck with whatever you decide Original post by Riku
I'm convinced I'm gonna enter cardiac arrest from potassium overdose. Got even more anxious considering I've been having stuff full of it like bananas, oranges, raisins and honey pretty much every day since the beginning of recovery. If I get scared to eat fruit again then I'm pretty screwed. If anyone can help that'd be nice please.
/uni panic
/uni panic
After some light googling I've found that the only people even vaguely at risk of potassium overdose are those with impaired kidney function or other pre-existing conditions. There's also something to do with balancing potassium and sodium, which I don't fully understand, but it's something along the lines of, even if you consume loads of potassium (which you probably haven't anyway*), if it's not the only thing you eat, you will also be consuming sodium and that can somehow reduce the effect?
*There are stories all over the place about people eating nothing but bananas for days, eating 10 in one sitting, and blah, and the most anyone suffered was a stomach upset anyway.
If you think about it, if you've been having a lot of potassium-rich foods for a long time, there's absolutely no reason to suggest it would suddenly build up and become dangerous. If you were going to overdose, it would have happened straight away. I completely understand the irrational nature of this anxiety around food, but hopefully I can try to rationalise it for you a bit. People eat fruit. All. the. time. And everyone is fine. In fact, most internet sources say that most people don't get *enough* potassium, so you are probably actually more healthy than the rest of us.
After some light googling I've found that the only people even vaguely at risk of potassium overdose are those with impaired kidney function or other pre-existing conditions. There's also something to do with balancing potassium and sodium, which I don't fully understand, but it's something along the lines of, even if you consume loads of potassium (which you probably haven't anyway*), if it's not the only thing you eat, you will also be consuming sodium and that can somehow reduce the effect?
*There are stories all over the place about people eating nothing but bananas for days, eating 10 in one sitting, and blah, and the most anyone suffered was a stomach upset anyway.
If you think about it, if you've been having a lot of potassium-rich foods for a long time, there's absolutely no reason to suggest it would suddenly build up and become dangerous. If you were going to overdose, it would have happened straight away. I completely understand the irrational nature of this anxiety around food, but hopefully I can try to rationalise it for you a bit. People eat fruit. All. the. time. And everyone is fine. In fact, most internet sources say that most people don't get *enough* potassium, so you are probably actually more healthy than the rest of us.
*There are stories all over the place about people eating nothing but bananas for days, eating 10 in one sitting, and blah, and the most anyone suffered was a stomach upset anyway.
If you think about it, if you've been having a lot of potassium-rich foods for a long time, there's absolutely no reason to suggest it would suddenly build up and become dangerous. If you were going to overdose, it would have happened straight away. I completely understand the irrational nature of this anxiety around food, but hopefully I can try to rationalise it for you a bit. People eat fruit. All. the. time. And everyone is fine. In fact, most internet sources say that most people don't get *enough* potassium, so you are probably actually more healthy than the rest of us.
Yeah, I think it's about balancing the sodium levels with potassium, but I thought as I don't eat all that much salt compared to most people since I avoid processed food half the time...aargh, I could sit here all day and go bananas! (Dire pun intended, hoping for forgiveness
)I'm going to try and accept that this is still anxiety, although admittedly it's one of the ones which has scared me for a while and may very well come back (might end up posting same worry tomorrow even >_<)
[It just did, heart jumped out of chest o_o]
I might also want to stay away from the weights for a bit and stick to the walking, jogging, swimming etc. as you said-I know I'll need strength training for full fitness benefits eventually, but maybe at the moment I'm still misinterpreting the usual chest soreness after working out as something more serious.
Thanks again for the kind words and advice : )
(edited 12 years ago)
Original post by Our_Lot
Things have calmed down with my mum right now but my hypochondria is really kicking in again (at least, I hope it's hypochondria). This afternoon, I was sitting very relaxed, reading in the sun and feeling good. My chest pains came back again. I managed to rationalise and say "it's probably inflammation", and eventually, they got better.
Tonight, there is still some pain there but now it's moved to my back. A few weeks ago, I read the obituary of this talented young musician who had a sudden aortic aneurysm and died. There was a pulsating feeling in my back and now I'm worried that it's going to happen to me, so I'm feeling anxious and helpless right now. My blood pressure is okay which apparently reduces the risk of such things happening but I'm still very worried. Right now, I can't stop thinking about what could be wrong with me. It doesn't help that they haven't come up with a definitive diagnosis for me yet other than anxiety and while I don't doubt I am suffering with that, I swear there is an underlying physical problem too.
Practically speaking, can anyone with medical knowledge tell me if there is any chance of my worst fears coming true with the chest and back pain (does it make any difference that I've been having symptoms for about a month?)?
If any of you have similar worries about their health, then please feel free to share. It would be reassuring to know I'm not the only one.
Things have calmed down with my mum right now but my hypochondria is really kicking in again (at least, I hope it's hypochondria). This afternoon, I was sitting very relaxed, reading in the sun and feeling good. My chest pains came back again. I managed to rationalise and say "it's probably inflammation", and eventually, they got better.
Tonight, there is still some pain there but now it's moved to my back. A few weeks ago, I read the obituary of this talented young musician who had a sudden aortic aneurysm and died. There was a pulsating feeling in my back and now I'm worried that it's going to happen to me, so I'm feeling anxious and helpless right now. My blood pressure is okay which apparently reduces the risk of such things happening but I'm still very worried. Right now, I can't stop thinking about what could be wrong with me. It doesn't help that they haven't come up with a definitive diagnosis for me yet other than anxiety and while I don't doubt I am suffering with that, I swear there is an underlying physical problem too.
Practically speaking, can anyone with medical knowledge tell me if there is any chance of my worst fears coming true with the chest and back pain (does it make any difference that I've been having symptoms for about a month?)?
If any of you have similar worries about their health, then please feel free to share. It would be reassuring to know I'm not the only one.
you are definitely not the only one! i have suffered with anxiety related chest pains for about 3-4 years. intially, i think it was irrational fear of having health problems that sparked my panic attacks, and it just got worse from then on (i'll also point out that for the most of these 3-4 years i have been absolutely fine with no health problems!). from reading around i have realised that these chest pains are probably a result of tension from stress - when i'm stressed or anxious, i notice that my body is more rigid and my breathing is just crazy and shallow, which i think probably makes it worse. it's just difficult when you know that realistically, as a young healthy person, there is probably nothing wrong with you - but the chest pains continue. although - i have said that - for weeks i got absolutely terrible headaches which i was convinced was a tumour/something horribly wrong with my eyes or head which turned out to be a simple case of allergic conjunctivis...
i found that exercise helps. even when you're getting chest pains! i know it seems like the opposite thing you'd want to do but it definitely relaxes you and as i said, i think the tension is the cause of pain. i used to do pilates when i was doing my a levels and when my anxiety was worse and it helped a lot with relaxing/stretching and most importantly taking my mind of panicking.
lately my asthma has been getting gradually worse though which is making my anxiety worse as i worry about the asthma and then it's just a general downwards spiral. i'm sort of in denial about telling anyone i'm suffering again and still don't think it's bad enough to get any help. i've coped through three years of uni doing a demanding course at a top uni and now i've graduated and am trying to get a training contract as a lawyer it's all getting a bit too much. part of me wonders whether this means i'm not cut out for it all but i won't give up that easily...the joys of being stubborn
Just thought I would give everyone an update. My anxiety is sky high at the moment with the thought of my parents going away for a week in just over a weeks time.
Managed however to get to my seminars today, made easier that I now have an account with the taxi firm via the disability services account at uni so I dont have to find change every morning.
However my health is **** ! I've had about 11 UTIs now, had one last week, doctor sent off a wee sample. Had to go back to walk in centre tonight after a job interview because I've got another one. He got the results and basically my infections are being caused by a rare bacteria you normally find on your skin. The antibiotic I had been taking all along is resistant to it. Got more antibiotics to take now. Got to go to my own doctors in the morning ASAP as the doctor needs to talk to microbiology about the results and urgh basically I'm screwed. Got a pelvis , kidneys, and transvaginal scan on the 20th. Sounds lovely. Still getting ovary pain.
Boyfriends in a mood because He's got to get up early to go to the doctors before work to check he doesn't keep passing an infection on to me.
Basically all I want to do is curl up in a ball and watch movies and sleep.
Managed however to get to my seminars today, made easier that I now have an account with the taxi firm via the disability services account at uni so I dont have to find change every morning.
However my health is **** ! I've had about 11 UTIs now, had one last week, doctor sent off a wee sample. Had to go back to walk in centre tonight after a job interview because I've got another one. He got the results and basically my infections are being caused by a rare bacteria you normally find on your skin. The antibiotic I had been taking all along is resistant to it. Got more antibiotics to take now. Got to go to my own doctors in the morning ASAP as the doctor needs to talk to microbiology about the results and urgh basically I'm screwed. Got a pelvis , kidneys, and transvaginal scan on the 20th. Sounds lovely. Still getting ovary pain.
Boyfriends in a mood because He's got to get up early to go to the doctors before work to check he doesn't keep passing an infection on to me.
Basically all I want to do is curl up in a ball and watch movies and sleep.
Original post by insignificant
Just thought I would give everyone an update. My anxiety is sky high at the moment with the thought of my parents going away for a week in just over a weeks time.
Managed however to get to my seminars today, made easier that I now have an account with the taxi firm via the disability services account at uni so I dont have to find change every morning.
However my health is **** ! I've had about 11 UTIs now, had one last week, doctor sent off a wee sample. Had to go back to walk in centre tonight after a job interview because I've got another one. He got the results and basically my infections are being caused by a rare bacteria you normally find on your skin. The antibiotic I had been taking all along is resistant to it. Got more antibiotics to take now. Got to go to my own doctors in the morning ASAP as the doctor needs to talk to microbiology about the results and urgh basically I'm screwed. Got a pelvis , kidneys, and transvaginal scan on the 20th. Sounds lovely. Still getting ovary pain.
Boyfriends in a mood because He's got to get up early to go to the doctors before work to check he doesn't keep passing an infection on to me.
Basically all I want to do is curl up in a ball and watch movies and sleep.
Managed however to get to my seminars today, made easier that I now have an account with the taxi firm via the disability services account at uni so I dont have to find change every morning.
However my health is **** ! I've had about 11 UTIs now, had one last week, doctor sent off a wee sample. Had to go back to walk in centre tonight after a job interview because I've got another one. He got the results and basically my infections are being caused by a rare bacteria you normally find on your skin. The antibiotic I had been taking all along is resistant to it. Got more antibiotics to take now. Got to go to my own doctors in the morning ASAP as the doctor needs to talk to microbiology about the results and urgh basically I'm screwed. Got a pelvis , kidneys, and transvaginal scan on the 20th. Sounds lovely. Still getting ovary pain.
Boyfriends in a mood because He's got to get up early to go to the doctors before work to check he doesn't keep passing an infection on to me.
Basically all I want to do is curl up in a ball and watch movies and sleep.
Well, without wanting to sound like I'm misinterpreting you, the fact that the majority of that post was about your physical health and not your anxiety seems like good sign to me
You are gaining the perspective you need to consider other parts of your life and not just the anxiety, which is very valuable - try to remember this feeling - the feeling of having a bad day, rather than a bad life. Good luck with the health problems, and well done for going to some of your seminars! Original post by Riku
Yeah, I think it's about balancing the sodium levels with potassium, but I thought as I don't eat all that much salt compared to most people since I avoid processed food half the time...aargh, I could sit here all day and go bananas! (Dire pun intended, hoping for forgiveness )
I'm going to try and accept that this is still anxiety, although admittedly it's one of the ones which has scared me for a while and may very well come back (might end up posting same worry tomorrow even >_<)
[It just did, heart jumped out of chest o_o]
I might also want to stay away from the weights for a bit and stick to the walking, jogging, swimming etc. as you said-I know I'll need strength training for full fitness benefits eventually, but maybe at the moment I'm still misinterpreting the usual chest soreness after working out as something more serious.
Thanks again for the kind words and advice : )
)I'm going to try and accept that this is still anxiety, although admittedly it's one of the ones which has scared me for a while and may very well come back (might end up posting same worry tomorrow even >_<)
[It just did, heart jumped out of chest o_o]
I might also want to stay away from the weights for a bit and stick to the walking, jogging, swimming etc. as you said-I know I'll need strength training for full fitness benefits eventually, but maybe at the moment I'm still misinterpreting the usual chest soreness after working out as something more serious.
Thanks again for the kind words and advice : )
Hope you managed to get a bit of sleep, and I agree about taking it (slightly!) easy on the exercise to keep you calm.
First step to recover is admitting you have a problem
Original post by Amwazicles
Well, without wanting to sound like I'm misinterpreting you, the fact that the majority of that post was about your physical health and not your anxiety seems like good sign to me You are gaining the perspective you need to consider other parts of your life and not just the anxiety, which is very valuable - try to remember this feeling - the feeling of having a bad day, rather than a bad life. Good luck with the health problems, and well done for going to some of your seminars!
You are gaining the perspective you need to consider other parts of your life and not just the anxiety, which is very valuable - try to remember this feeling - the feeling of having a bad day, rather than a bad life. Good luck with the health problems, and well done for going to some of your seminars! Thankyou
I'm in a weird place right now.. sometimes I'll feel like every things wrong, can't handle anything, hate life, can't stop panicking.. and then ill go to sleep, wake up, and feel instantly better and not worry, until it starts getting dark again and I think its because I'm not looking forward to something, when it gets dark it reminds me that time is getting on and the thing is getting closer.. if you get me? its weird.
Hello guys.
I think I suffer from social anxiety. I hate going into public places or asking people I don't know for help face to face. My self confidence is really low. Every time I talk to people it feels like the rooms spinning and I'm constantly thinking of what I think they think of me. It doesn't help that i'm really ugly and have never taken a good picture. I spend most of my time on tsr as talking to strangers online and commenting on threads helps me imagine what life would be like if I wasn't too scared to talk to people. In fact I probably spend 2 hours a day day-dreaming what life would be like if I could pluck up the courage to talk to someone but I just can't...not since high school.
I don't seem to have good communicational skills either, so if I did start talking to someone, the conversation would probably end after 'how are you?'.
This has resulted in me having very few friends and now i'm at the point where I feel like I want to drop out of uni, get a job in a tiny office, not talk to anyone and live in isolation as that's all i'll be good for.
I also don't like to go see a councillor or a doctor. They don't really understand how I feel. It's just a quick diagnosis and then i'm back to where I started.
I know for sure I don't want to be like this and everyone just tells me to pluck up the courage and talk to people. I know this but what I don't know is how do I pluck up this 'courage'. It seems everyone I talk to about this tells me what to do but they don't seem to know or be able to tell me how to do it. How do I pluck up this courage?
I think i've spent so long on learning that i've become very strange...
I think I suffer from social anxiety. I hate going into public places or asking people I don't know for help face to face. My self confidence is really low. Every time I talk to people it feels like the rooms spinning and I'm constantly thinking of what I think they think of me. It doesn't help that i'm really ugly and have never taken a good picture. I spend most of my time on tsr as talking to strangers online and commenting on threads helps me imagine what life would be like if I wasn't too scared to talk to people. In fact I probably spend 2 hours a day day-dreaming what life would be like if I could pluck up the courage to talk to someone but I just can't...not since high school.
I don't seem to have good communicational skills either, so if I did start talking to someone, the conversation would probably end after 'how are you?'.
This has resulted in me having very few friends and now i'm at the point where I feel like I want to drop out of uni, get a job in a tiny office, not talk to anyone and live in isolation as that's all i'll be good for.
I also don't like to go see a councillor or a doctor. They don't really understand how I feel. It's just a quick diagnosis and then i'm back to where I started.
I know for sure I don't want to be like this and everyone just tells me to pluck up the courage and talk to people. I know this but what I don't know is how do I pluck up this 'courage'. It seems everyone I talk to about this tells me what to do but they don't seem to know or be able to tell me how to do it. How do I pluck up this courage?
I think i've spent so long on learning that i've become very strange...
Original post by insignificant
Thankyou I'm in a weird place right now.. sometimes I'll feel like every things wrong, can't handle anything, hate life, can't stop panicking.. and then ill go to sleep, wake up, and feel instantly better and not worry, until it starts getting dark again and I think its because I'm not looking forward to something, when it gets dark it reminds me that time is getting on and the thing is getting closer.. if you get me? its weird.
I'm in a weird place right now.. sometimes I'll feel like every things wrong, can't handle anything, hate life, can't stop panicking.. and then ill go to sleep, wake up, and feel instantly better and not worry, until it starts getting dark again and I think its because I'm not looking forward to something, when it gets dark it reminds me that time is getting on and the thing is getting closer.. if you get me? its weird.I know exactly what you mean. I always feel so much worse when it gets dark, that's why I don't like this time of year either :/
