lonely at uni

Hi. I just moved to uni last week and this week has been freshers week and I haven't done much. I have never seen my flat yet and it's been many days but they're all out all the time (there's not many of them). I feel depressed for the first time in my life. I am really trying to make friends through societies and other events. I have made one friend but they live far away and they are good friends with their flat so we don't do too much together. I really want to drop out. My uni is prestigious so I would try to go through clearing for a bad uni near to my home and commute despite having no friends at home as they're all at uni. I hate the town I am in too as it's too big for me also. My parents are angry that I want to drop out, they would let me do so, but they would also be disappointed and I hate making them feel like that. I feel the lowest in my life and I don't know what to do. Do I drop out before I have to pay fees or do I keep on going and stay unhappy?

Hi, so sorry about how you're feeling. I felt that way during my first week. Have you tried talking to your uni wellbeing team? Are you a sports fan or do you have any hobbies? If you get stuck into one society, like say baking trust me you'll male loads of friends. I did that last year and now only this year I'm starting to branch put to other societies and try different things.

Also, which uni are you going to by the way?

My parents contacted the wellbeing team actually without me knowing haha but speaking to them would make me feel worse to be honest. Speaking to home friends and family is a lot better for me as I feel like I can share more info etc! I've been to a few society events but a lot of people seem to be older years and I am looking for people in first year like me because I don't want to make friends with people who will leave a lot earlier than me. I don't feel comfortable sharing but you may be able to guess anyway.

Yeah, I get that. Uni services aren't for everyone. Definitely speak to people you feel comfortable with.

I get the whole society events thing. The society I joined last year was like that but the had a weekly group that was for freshers in my halls that helped me.

Honestly, if you can’t find anything that suits you and you don't feel happy. You should try switching unis. It doesn't make you a failure. It just means you prioritise yourself and your mental health and honestly, that is such a difficult and brave thing to do. So many times people overlook it and push through regardless and eventually breakdown.

Continue talking to people you are comfortable with sharing with. Also, I don't mind you sending anything on this thread if you messaging me personally if you ever feel like it.

Also, this may seem very counterintuitive but at my uni study spaces seem to be a great place to meet people for some weird reason. A lot of talking and chatting goes on rather than actual studying🤣

Thank you so much! Honestly I am considering switching unis but I would have to go through clearing wouldn't I? I really appreciate your kindness.

No worries ❤️

You may have to go through clearing. Also, depending on you can just call up whatever uni you are interested in and see if they have any spaces for your course.
Some may require you to take a deferred offer tho.

Thank you so much! All the best for the rest of uni! I'll try to update in a few weeks what I have chosen to do if you're interested lol but thank you again.