GOGSoc Episode VI: The GoG, the Bad and the Ugly

Original post by Anatheme

X

I'd been on various SSRIs since I was 14, so I know how you feel. :smile:

After a brief jaunt with sertraline in December, I've taken nothing since January, and it's been going okay, so far.

Glad to know you're feeling better. :h:

Reply 8201

The_Lonely_Goatherd

Original post by Anatheme

I've been struggling with anxiety for pretty much most of my life, particularly around exam time when I would have breakdowns and feel particularly crappy and anxious. I started CBT in January and I have now sat my first exam feeling normal. No waves of anxiety rolling off, no feeling sick, no last-minute frantic reading of my notes in the hope of cramming anything else in, no crying because I felt like everything was gonna go wrong and end up even worse.

I managed to go to sleep yesterday feeling relaxed, woke up this morning with what I see as normal levels of stress, actually felt positive about my exam and eager to get started, and managed to not breakdown during said exam. This is a huge step for me, considering I had been crying and breaking down in exams for the last 11 years…! I'm still struggling with low self-confidence when it comes to academia, but I didn't think I'd ever sit an exam feeling fine about it!

/end of the boring story!

Like sj27 said, not a boring story at all! What tremendous leaps you have made in your recovery from anxiety! You should be SO proud of yourself because without the hard work you have clearly put into your CBT sessions, you wouldn't be where you are today. Thrilled for you! :h:

Reply 8202

Kitty Pimms

Just a quickie because I am knackered and going to bed!

Craggy - big hugs
Piggsil - KAGE! :teeth:

Anatheme - that's a wonderful story, congratulations :smile:

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Reply 8203

llacerta

19

Original post by Anatheme

I've been struggling with anxiety for pretty much most of my life, particularly around exam time when I would have breakdowns and feel particularly crappy and anxious. I started CBT in January and I have now sat my first exam feeling normal. No waves of anxiety rolling off, no feeling sick, no last-minute frantic reading of my notes in the hope of cramming anything else in, no crying because I felt like everything was gonna go wrong and end up even worse.

I managed to go to sleep yesterday feeling relaxed, woke up this morning with what I see as normal levels of stress, actually felt positive about my exam and eager to get started, and managed to not breakdown during said exam. This is a huge step for me, considering I had been crying and breaking down in exams for the last 11 years…! I'm still struggling with low self-confidence when it comes to academia, but I didn't think I'd ever sit an exam feeling fine about it!

/end of the boring story!

That's a truly inspirational story; you should be very, very proud of yourself. Honestly. I genuinely mean it when I say that I've been toying with seeing someone about my anxiety for the last couple of years now, and to hear that treatment can work- and that you can end up being okay in the most stressful of academic situations, an exam!- is, as I said, inspirational. Well done!

Reply 8204

Do you think it would be annoying to ask one of my tutors when he'll finish marking our final essays? If I get that mark back, then I'll know what I need to get in my dissertation.

Reply 8205

Kitty Pimms

Original post by Iridescenzo

Do you think it would be annoying to ask one of my tutors when he'll finish marking our final essays? If I get that mark back, then I'll know what I need to get in my dissertation.

How long has he had them? If less than a month, don't ask, IMHO.

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Reply 8206

Interrobang

Study days are meant to be for baking cupcakes, right?

Reply 8207

Original post by Kitty Pimms

How long has he had them? If less than a month, don't ask, IMHO.

Only about 2 weeks, but I thought he'd get them done a bit sooner than usual, considering he doesn't have to teach again until September.
I was just worried, because my dissertation was vastly underwhelming, mostly due to poor time management between my final essays. My tutor sent me one last appraisal the night before (because she knew I was pulling an all-nighter), but I'm not convinced. She's known to be a very harsh marker.

I've read through this, albeit quickly, and it's still very descriptive in parts, with little critical engagement. However, it IS much tighter than before and there is a central thread of consolation and grief running through it that lends the study much more coherence than before. Your reader knows where they are and what they are getting, and this is a huge improvement on the last draft.

For all of your worries about this, it is a very nice piece of work and it engages with the poem on a detailed level. You should still be proud of what you've done.

Reply 8208

Kitty Pimms

Original post by Iridescenzo

Only about 2 weeks, but I thought he'd get them done a bit sooner than usual, considering he doesn't have to teach again until September.
I was just worried, because my dissertation was vastly underwhelming, mostly due to poor time management between my final essays. My tutor sent me one last appraisal the night before (because she knew I was pulling an all-nighter), but I'm not convinced. She's known to be a very harsh marker.

Yeah, we very rarely mark when we're teaching (Christmas holidays are such fun when you're an academic!), but it doesn't diminish the fact that we may have 200-300 scripts, and if you want the job done properly it takes time. If you're a final year they will almost certainly need to be moderated also and perhaps approved by the module board or passed to the external examiner. Your department will I am sure have some guidelines about when you can expect work back, and if the staff member goes over that, then you should contact them in the first instance and then complain if you don't get a satisfactory answer. If not, of course you can email them, but my experience is that I mark as fast as I can given the external constraints I'm under (just because no teaching =/= no other work, and in fact the admin load usually goes through the roof in May) and replying to students trying to predict these other factors just takes time away from doing the actual marking.

Obviously, your tutor may be less jaded than I am, but I doubt it :wink:

(edited 9 years ago)

Reply 8209

Original post by Kitty Pimms

Yeah, we very rarely mark when we're teaching (Christmas holidays are such fun when you're an academic!), but it doesn't diminish the fact that we may have 200-300 scripts, and if you want the job done properly it takes time. If you're a final year they will almost certainly need to be moderated also and perhaps approved by the module board or passed to the external examiner. Your department will I am sure have some guidelines about when you can expect work back, and if the staff member goes over that, then you should contact them in the first instance and then complain if you don't get a satisfactory answer. If not, of course you can email them, but my experience is that I mark as fast as I can given the external constraints I'm under (just because no teaching =/= no other work, and in fact the admin load usually goes through the roof in May) and replying to students trying to predict these other factors just takes time away from doing the actual marking.

Obviously, your tutor may be less jaded than I am, but I doubt it :wink:

Hmm.
Well, I just checked the portal, and the Turnitin entry says the expected return date is the 29th. I suppose it's not worth speculating on. The absolutely latest he can get them back is July 1st (results day), but there's a possibility he'll get them back before the end of June, with any luck. The standard essay length for this module was 4,000, so I suppose he'll be a bit busier than usual.

Reply 8210

Craghyrax

Original post by Iridescenzo

Hmm.
Well, I just checked the portal, and the Turnitin entry says the expected return date is the 29th. I suppose it's not worth speculating on. The absolutely latest he can get them back is July 1st (results day), but there's a possibility he'll get them back before the end of June, with any luck. The standard essay length for this module was 4,000, so I suppose he'll be a bit busier than usual.

If a student asked me for their marks earlier than the stated/appointed time, I would be very irritated.

Reply 8211

Jantaculum

10

Original post by Craghyrax

If a student asked me for their marks earlier than the stated/appointed time, I would be very irritated.

This. My tutor will - but only if agreed in advance and for a VERY good reason (eg if you're applying to other unis and need the result to meet their deadline). Even then he expects early submission. I think that's fair.

How'd it go last night Craggy?

Reply 8212

Piggsil

16

Original post by Anatheme

I've been struggling with anxiety for pretty much most of my life, particularly around exam time when I would have breakdowns and feel particularly crappy and anxious. I started CBT in January and I have now sat my first exam feeling normal. No waves of anxiety rolling off, no feeling sick, no last-minute frantic reading of my notes in the hope of cramming anything else in, no crying because I felt like everything was gonna go wrong and end up even worse.

I managed to go to sleep yesterday feeling relaxed, woke up this morning with what I see as normal levels of stress, actually felt positive about my exam and eager to get started, and managed to not breakdown during said exam. This is a huge step for me, considering I had been crying and breaking down in exams for the last 11 years…! I'm still struggling with low self-confidence when it comes to academia, but I didn't think I'd ever sit an exam feeling fine about it!

/end of the boring story!

Not boring. Awesome story! Really happy for you! :biggrin:

Original post by Kitty Pimms

Just a quickie because I am knackered and going to bed!

Craggy - big hugs
Piggsil - KAGE! :teeth:

Anatheme - that's a wonderful story, congratulations :smile:

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Lol Danish with all their Gs instead og Ks :p:

Original post by *Interrobang*

Study days are meant to be for baking cupcakes, right?

Hells yeah!

Reply 8213

Interrobang

Original post by Piggsil

Not boring. Awesome story! Really happy for you! :biggrin:

Lol Danish with all their Gs instead og Ks :p:

Hells yeah!

That's alright then, cos I've done no work today :tongue:

Reply 8214

Craghyrax

Congrats on the exam Anatheme! I also have anxiety, and its not boring/unimportant etc. Its very big and important and good news.

Original post by Jantaculum

How'd it go last night Craggy?

I went to sleep :frown:

Got 19 left to do before tomorrow morning. Then I'm in Cambridge graduation from 9 to late.

Reply 8215

Piggsil

16

Cake's looking good, managed to slice it successfully. Hope it tastes as good as it looks. All the component parts taste good, but I can't really cut myself a slice...

Reply 8216

Craghyrax

Girly moan:
Nightmare scenario. Just quickly went to choose my dress for tomorrow evening's graduation dinner, and NONE OF THEM FIT! I've put on so much weight lately with the stress, no sleeping, gym routine completely breaking down :frown:

Its just so damn annoying because I have a whole cupboard full of Cambridgey dresses which I NEVER wear since leaving, and on the one occasion that would call for it, none of them fit. Its just the last thing I need this evening as I'm almost certainly pulling another all nighter :cry2:

Reply 8217

madamemerle

10

Original post by Craghyrax

I

Spoiler

What a nightmare! Everything always comes at once, but that is a hell of a constellation! :hugs:

Hope it all turns out well in the end!

Reply 8218

The_Lonely_Goatherd