I am an eighteen year old male. I have great friends who are supportive in whatever I do. I am often told that I am "hot" or simply "good looking" by my friends, colleagues and strangers. I have an Instagram account with over ten-thousand followers; I constantly post selfies for validation. Even though no one calls me ugly, I feel disgusting.
I starve myself for days, and then binge eat. I also have moderate OCD and regularly make myself throw up. I can't stop looking at myself in mirrors. The way I look makes me feel depressed. If someone compliments the way I look, I brush it off. If someone makes a slightly negative comment on the way I look, it sticks with me for years. E.g, the other day, an ex-girlfriend (a good friend of mine, now) insisted that I was "gorgeous", but I disagreed with her; she assumed I was just being humble, when in reality I genuinely thought I was ugly. A few months ago, another friend said that I had a wide face, and I can't stop thinking about that. I feel intensely jealous of good looking people.
I feel like everyone is always staring at me and making fun out of me. As I grow older, it gets worse. I seriously do not know what to do.