So this friend..
Long story short, I really don't know how to deal with my best friend.
Ive known him for 6 years, and he confessed that he loved me. I was okay with this, but let him down gently that I did not want a relationship with him. I started to feel bad because he kept buying me gifts, he said "I thought if I loved you you would love me back" but it got obsessive and he wouldn't stop staring at me and got incredibly jealous if I talked to another guy. He even wrote me a love letter in Dragon..
Fast forward, to a week ago, he confessed again that he was terrified at the thought of me being in a relationship with someone else, and his friends thinks we are getting together.
I am am going through some tough times and have been the past 4 years, so I told him that I do not want to be in a relationship with him, and even if I did, I am not ready for one. What he took from that was I will be getting better in the next few weeks and we will be together.
He is incredibly cringy and I don't know what to do because it's making me feel really crap that I know after all this time he likes me, but he just won't get it into his head that we are never going to happen.
How ow can I deal with this?
Ive known him for 6 years, and he confessed that he loved me. I was okay with this, but let him down gently that I did not want a relationship with him. I started to feel bad because he kept buying me gifts, he said "I thought if I loved you you would love me back" but it got obsessive and he wouldn't stop staring at me and got incredibly jealous if I talked to another guy. He even wrote me a love letter in Dragon..
Fast forward, to a week ago, he confessed again that he was terrified at the thought of me being in a relationship with someone else, and his friends thinks we are getting together.
I am am going through some tough times and have been the past 4 years, so I told him that I do not want to be in a relationship with him, and even if I did, I am not ready for one. What he took from that was I will be getting better in the next few weeks and we will be together.
He is incredibly cringy and I don't know what to do because it's making me feel really crap that I know after all this time he likes me, but he just won't get it into his head that we are never going to happen.
How ow can I deal with this?
Original post by Anonymous
Long story short, I really don't know how to deal with my best friend.
Ive known him for 6 years, and he confessed that he loved me. I was okay with this, but let him down gently that I did not want a relationship with him. I started to feel bad because he kept buying me gifts, he said "I thought if I loved you you would love me back" but it got obsessive and he wouldn't stop staring at me and got incredibly jealous if I talked to another guy. He even wrote me a love letter in Dragon..
Fast forward, to a week ago, he confessed again that he was terrified at the thought of me being in a relationship with someone else, and his friends thinks we are getting together.
I am am going through some tough times and have been the past 4 years, so I told him that I do not want to be in a relationship with him, and even if I did, I am not ready for one. What he took from that was I will be getting better in the next few weeks and we will be together.
He is incredibly cringy and I don't know what to do because it's making me feel really crap that I know after all this time he likes me, but he just won't get it into his head that we are never going to happen.
How ow can I deal with this?
Ive known him for 6 years, and he confessed that he loved me. I was okay with this, but let him down gently that I did not want a relationship with him. I started to feel bad because he kept buying me gifts, he said "I thought if I loved you you would love me back" but it got obsessive and he wouldn't stop staring at me and got incredibly jealous if I talked to another guy. He even wrote me a love letter in Dragon..
Fast forward, to a week ago, he confessed again that he was terrified at the thought of me being in a relationship with someone else, and his friends thinks we are getting together.
I am am going through some tough times and have been the past 4 years, so I told him that I do not want to be in a relationship with him, and even if I did, I am not ready for one. What he took from that was I will be getting better in the next few weeks and we will be together.
He is incredibly cringy and I don't know what to do because it's making me feel really crap that I know after all this time he likes me, but he just won't get it into his head that we are never going to happen.
How ow can I deal with this?
exactly the same thing happened to me, 100% like this, it went on for one year, we were so close, he made it obv he liked me, he was so obsessed if I went to the toilet he would say I was avoiding him when really I needed the toilet :/ just stop speaking to him. I did. I am happy, and now I look back at it, I don't know why I was his best friend, he was forcing me to be his best friend, nothing else. he has changed now and is a loser, so glad I got away. he was a stalker. get away while you can. it wont work out, don't force it to work like I did, it WON'T work out.
Original post by shawn_o1
So you see him as only a friend, not a partner. Does he have other friends? If not then he is not worthy of anyone's friendship, as demonstrated by his actions towards you
He does have other friends, but I've set boundaries as to what is friendship - like he tries to hold my hand and stuff and I'm fine with compliments, but he does it in a weird way :/
Original post by Anonymous
exactly the same thing happened to me, 100% like this, it went on for one year, we were so close, he made it obv he liked me, he was so obsessed if I went to the toilet he would say I was avoiding him when really I needed the toilet :/ just stop speaking to him. I did. I am happy, and now I look back at it, I don't know why I was his best friend, he was forcing me to be his best friend, nothing else. he has changed now and is a loser, so glad I got away. he was a stalker. get away while you can. it wont work out, don't force it to work like I did, it WON'T work out.
Sorry to hear that
He is a good friend though but it's getting to the point where I do not want to be around him anymore
Don't think this will work out well. If he continues to act like an idiot the best thing is to tell him to sling his hook. He'll hate it at the time but see the wisdom of it later. Worst thing is to let it drift until you have a bf. I speak from a bit of personal experience having once been a bit of a friendzoned fool myself..
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
He does have other friends, but I've set boundaries as to what is friendship - like he tries to hold my hand and stuff and I'm fine with compliments, but he does it in a weird way :/
Sorry to hear that
He is a good friend though but it's getting to the point where I do not want to be around him anymore
Sorry to hear that
He is a good friend though but it's getting to the point where I do not want to be around him anymore
I'm a bit like that to a friend, though I wasn't ever as extreme/obsessed as the person you're describing, but we don't talk anymore, and I think that's what you should do. He has issues that he should realise once you stop talking to him and maybe he'll change, but there's no way that he'll give up unless you cut off all forms of contact with him. It's not healthy for either of you and he needs to be able to form real attachments with other people, not whatever he has going on with you, so just walk away.
See the things is, he seems to be in a different world.
The other day I went to his house to hang out, he said he wanted to show me a weird video. I like weird stuff and was like, sure....
I did not expect to be watching hentai
The other day I went to his house to hang out, he said he wanted to show me a weird video. I like weird stuff and was like, sure....
I did not expect to be watching hentai
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