I get attached too easily

if anyone especially an acquaintance that i admire or feel attracted towards starts a convo with me i immediately get attached. As the weeks go by we would normally talk at least once everyday and at last become very close friends. But the thing is. They normally know how to move on and they had other people to talk to during those times we've talked so they're not as easily attached as i am. when i am talking to somoene all i can think about is them and i focus all my attention to them. but when i don't get that typpe of response back i feel like a wreck.

Does anyone know how to not feel too attached to somebody?

Reply 1

UWS

21

Same here, whenever a girl shows me any form of friendliness/kindness I'm already falling for her.

It just might be a psychological thing, it might stem from an inexperience in forming true relationships with people or maybe that's just how you are. The best thing to do is if you start to fall for them, is to step back a bit and reduce contact.

Reply 2

bluemadhatter

20

I'm clingy and require a lot of attention so I guess you could say that makes me easily attach onto people ESPECIALLY if they provide me with the attention I need. Then they'll stop for a little while and my whole world just falls apart. And they'll give it to me again and its just a cycle that is actually quite unhealthy. I rely on other peoples attention to self validate myself and boost my self esteem. I need to learn to rely on myself. I need to become attached to my reflection.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by bluemadhatter

I'm clingy and require a lot of attention so I guess you could say that makes me easily attach onto people ESPECIALLY if they provide me with the attention I need. Then they'll stop for a little while and my whole world just falls apart. And they'll give it to me again and its just a cycle that is actually quite unhealthy. I rely on other peoples attention to self validate myself and boost my self esteem. I need to learn to rely on myself. I need to become attached to my reflection.

this is me so much :frown:

Reply 4

Siberiaan

21

Original post by bluemadhatter

I'm clingy and require a lot of attention so I guess you could say that makes me easily attach onto people ESPECIALLY if they provide me with the attention I need. Then they'll stop for a little while and my whole world just falls apart. And they'll give it to me again and its just a cycle that is actually quite unhealthy. I rely on other peoples attention to self validate myself and boost my self esteem. I need to learn to rely on myself. I need to become attached to my reflection.

You can always kiss the mirror , get closer to ur reflection

nom sayin?

Reply 5

bluemadhatter

20

Original post by TSR Mustafa

You can always kiss the mirror , get closer to ur reflection

nom sayin?

lipsyncing sassy songs on snapchat helps me love myself

Reply 6

Anonymous #2

Original post by UWS

Same here, whenever a girl shows me any form of friendliness/kindness I'm already falling for her.

It just might be a psychological thing, it might stem from an inexperience in forming true relationships with people or maybe that's just how you are. The best thing to do is if you start to fall for them, is to step back a bit and reduce contact.

Yeah its almost attractive when they show friendliness/kindness

Reply 7

Siberiaan

21

Original post by bluemadhatter

lipsyncing sassy songs on snapchat helps me love myself

Yeah i have the same problem :P

Reply 8

username2289623

OP

15

Original post by UWS

Same here, whenever a girl shows me any form of friendliness/kindness I'm already falling for her.

It just might be a psychological thing, it might stem from an inexperience in forming true relationships with people or maybe that's just how you are. The best thing to do is if you start to fall for them, is to step back a bit and reduce contact.

Thank you, I think inexperience could be a possibility and i'll make sure to create a distance when i feel myself getting too attached

Reply 9

username2289623

OP

15

Original post by bluemadhatter

I'm clingy and require a lot of attention so I guess you could say that makes me easily attach onto people ESPECIALLY if they provide me with the attention I need. Then they'll stop for a little while and my whole world just falls apart. And they'll give it to me again and its just a cycle that is actually quite unhealthy. I rely on other peoples attention to self validate myself and boost my self esteem. I need to learn to rely on myself. I need to become attached to my reflection.

Thank you, i am quite glad im not the only person :')

Reply 10

username1738583

21

Original post by bluemadhatter

I'm clingy and require a lot of attention so I guess you could say that makes me easily attach onto people ESPECIALLY if they provide me with the attention I need. Then they'll stop for a little while and my whole world just falls apart. And they'll give it to me again and its just a cycle that is actually quite unhealthy. I rely on other peoples attention to self validate myself and boost my self esteem. I need to learn to rely on myself. I need to become attached to my reflection.

I think this is the most relatable thing i've read on this god forsaken site

Reply 11

Anonymous #3

Original post by username2289623

they had other people to talk to during those times we've talked so they're not as easily attached as i am. when i am talking to somoene all i can think about is them and i focus all my attention to them. but when i don't get that typpe of response back i feel like a wreck.

Does anyone know how to not feel too attached to somebody?

I have the same issue...I assume I will grow out of it, in the meantime, you put a big hint in your question that I should talk to other people too...although easier said than done, I am a bit picky who I choose to discuss things with.

I am very intense and focus all my attention on one person, it's my default setting...one way is to admit it to the other person, (I have,) and then suggest taking "time off" of about 6 months of each year just to spend time doing other things with other people and self-reflection. I do assume I will grow out of this behaviour -- it's probably because I'm not spending time with "suitable" people but they are fascinating and lovely for now (and the time off is very useful and enjoyable although missing that person is obviously something to deal with and admit at the start)

I get attached too easily

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