Is it rape if he's my boyfriend

I know you must smell cause of it right ? the pits I mean

You'd know.

Knowledge of hygiene and how the human body works fail.

Knowledge of hygiene and how the human body works fail.

actually I am highly knowledgeable about the anatomical and biological systems of the human body It was a tongue in cheek comment as she is my partner lol

S'ok, he's my boyfriend. It's just banter.

Well now I look like a twerp...

Well now I look like a twerp...

keeps werry werry quiet..... I'm twerp hunting

I'll try and twerp quietly from now on.




Twerp twerp twerp

I am sorry you feel that way. You are right in that this was sexual assault but it is also rape as he carried on having sex with her against her will. It may have started as sexual assault as he was penetrating her with his fingers but she was clearly saying no and he carried on. Even though she 'gave in' she made it very clear that she was not happy and did not want to have sex, and he continued to have sex with her - this is penetration therefore it is rape.

I am glad that you referred to the rape crisis website as they are a really good organisation to go to for support when things like this happen. As they point out on the page you refer to: Section 74 defines consent as "if she agrees by choice, and has the freedom and capacity to make that choice" . In the offences of rape, assault by penetration, sexual assault and causing a person to engage in sexual activity without consent, a person (A) is guilty of an offence if (s)he:

Acts intentionally;
(B) does not consent to the act; and
does not reasonably believe that B consents

In this case it was clear that she was not consenting.

I hope this helps clear this up. It can be a difficult issue and the OP was really brave asking for advice.
Jo

nice someone has a sense of humour

Sorry, can't reply, I might twerp by accident.

(Story of my life)

Accidental twerping? I think they have pills for that ...

Accidental twerping? I think they have pills for that ...

I'm frankly shocked by the number if people who are saying this is not rape. To me it clearly is because she was coerced into it. She isn't willingly giving consent - she's pressured into it. That makes it rape.

Thing is, if some of these people admitted that what happened to the OP was rape, they'd then have to consider their own coercive, sexist and non-consensual behaviour. A lot of people are so selfish and out for whatever they can get that their only recourse is to deny that others have basic rights and to loudly assert the validity of their own behaviour by calling others 'ridiculous' and implying that if people didn't behave the way they do then nothing would ever get done.

But, she did consent in the end.

I'm confused. How the hell is something rape if she consented in the end?

It's ok to be confused, i understand that this is a difficult issue to get your head round.
The thing is that although she 'gave in' this is not true consent because she did not want to have sex. She made it clear that she was not happy and did not want to have sex. If you give in because the other person will not listen to you and will not stop, and also tries to make you feel bad for not wanting it, this is not true consent.
I hope that makes sense.
jo

I would re-engage with Teenage Pirate but I feel it's pretty pointless (as apparently I'm a 'ridiculous feminazi') and Jo is doing a great job.



And the point of being rude was?

FYI, I have a very active sex life. And (shock!) it's all consensual. Zomg. How could a munter like me manage that? Perhaps it's because I give an epic blowjob.

I don't even shave my pits =O

I've run out of rep, so here's a picture of an upside down baby seal instead.

I've run out of rep, so here's a picture of an upside down baby seal instead.

I am sorry you feel that way. You are right in that this was sexual assault but it is also rape as he carried on having sex with her against her will. It may have started as sexual assault as he was penetrating her with his fingers but she was clearly saying no and he carried on. Even though she 'gave in' she made it very clear that she was not happy and did not want to have sex, and he continued to have sex with her - this is penetration therefore it is rape.