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Attitudes towards older virgins (21-26)

Reply 80

Guffy

Anonymous

But carbs are my favorite :frown:

Yea, gonna have to give it a go. More meat and fish i guess so its not all bad :biggrin:

What do you have instead of rice or pasta with a meal ?

What, if I'm looking to shed some flab? Peanuts, walnuts, almonds, cottage cheese, fruit, veg, eggs, you can eat meat, etc.

Reply 81

kam

10

Being a 21 yr old virgin, I don't see any real big issue.
There is no need to have sex before you're 21, it depends on whether or not you're ready/meet the right person.

Reply 82

Any Colour You Like

Firstly- to Anonymous 8, I'm sorry if I get it wrong but it sounds like you're only single as a result of, well, same reason anyone is..chance. Even if you're on the lookout-so to speak- it's not everyday you meet someone you just click with. It sounds like you have a poor-self image. If this reflects in your body langauge and general attittude then you would probabaly be coming across in a less attractive way to women. If you're outgoing and sociable though then I wouldve thought you're halfway there.

Regarding some people's view that to be a virgin when you're in your early 20s is sad and somehow weird..bull****. I'm a female student, 20 in January (scary!) and I'm still a virgin. No, I'm not saving myself for marriage, I'm not adverse to sex etc etc. I have a great social life, lots of friends and all that. Being a virgin doesn't mean you're likely some sort of social recluse! Without sounding cocky, I get complimented on my looks/ appearence quite often and I get plenty of attention off men. It just depends-for me anyway- on your relationship history. I only had 1 boyfreind at the time when a lot of people lose it (16/17) He was a lot older and not good news, and was pressurising me into sex cos we hadn't slept together 1 month into our relationship. I'm glad I didn't sleep with him cos I'd regret it now, he wasn't right for me. Unfortuantely, I haven't really met anyone I really click with up till now. (Apart from someone I was seeing this summer, it was going that way but sadly the timing was all wrong there for us both.) That just goes to show that some people my age that are virgins aren't neccessarily waiting, things just don't always work out. I've nearly had sex with a guy I see casually, but the handful of times we've met up we've everything but sex cos I don't want to have "waited" till my age to lose it to someone who, yes is attractive and fun but means nothing to me. It's a funny one this virginity stuff, I almost wish I had lost it by now so that I could just enjoy some casual-ish stuff, without sounding slutty. But I want to lose it with someone who I care about and who cares about me...like my summer guy. He was everything to me. Crux of it is, nobody should feel pressured to lose it.

Reply 83

Guffy

Any Colour, you remind me very, very much of a friend of mine. Absolutely stunning girl, one of the nicest people you'll ever meet in your life, but for some weird reason, she has never had a boyfriend.

She ended up losing her virginity at 20 to a guy she was sort of seeing, but then he turned into a dick and didn't want to know. She didn't regret it though, because things were nice for a while, and she feels it's a hurdle overcome.

She's still of the mind not to sleep with anybody she's not seeing, however, and her partner count remains at 1.

Reply 84

person 34

9

that they're either
catholic
ugly
asexual

Reply 85

minimo

15

Esquire

I think it's different for guys, there's an expectation there. It's more socially acceptable for a girl to remain virgin for as long as she wants, it's seen as a choice. If a bloke is older and virgin it's seen as by default.

If I marry a guy who is a virgin, I will be very pleased, and I won;t think there's anything wrong with him! Honestly.

Hmm, my opinions on this...I was actually discussing it with friends over dinner today. I was brought up as a Catholic, so pre-marital sex, I was told was wrong. And I think it's a beautiful idea, to lose your virginity on your wedding night. However, from a girl's perspective, you might, as a friend put it, "you'll go from wowowowow...it's my wedding night to owowowow" as your hymen is torn apart :p:

So I personally don't think it's wrong really to try stuff with the man you are going to marry beforehand, so your wedding night does get truly special. But then I'm torn, I'd really like to be one of those brides who merit wearing white at their wedding.

Reply 86

RL99

1

Esquire

I think it's different for guys, there's an expectation there. It's more socially acceptable for a girl to remain virgin for as long as she wants, it's seen as a choice. If a bloke is older and virgin it's seen as by default.

Yeah, despite the fact that I would guess there are more male virgins in this age range than female, since it is for the most part still men that do the approaching/propositioning. A bloke can be shy and lacking confidence and therefore not get anywhere, a girl with the same personality could still get plenty of offers (as it were).
As a slight aside, who has actually experienced peer pressure/insults relating to this issue? Or is the real pressure/criticism normally from within?

Reply 87

Anonymous #9

Guess they got there head screwed on No pregnancy scares, No sti/std scares

but has nothink to do with anyone else if your a virgin
how many people you slept with is nothink to brag about

Reply 88

high priestess fnord

9

Anonymous

Guess they got there head screwed on No pregnancy scares, No sti/std scares

but has nothink to do with anyone else if your a virgin
how many people you slept with is nothink to brag about

yes you have shown me the light. i am going to dump my bf (because im scared he may dump me), never leave the house (thus eliminating the risk of being hit by a car/ mugged etc), never try any new food (i may be allergic to it and die)... etc. if i dont do anything then nothing bad will happen to me!!

Reply 89

horrorboy

L.J

I would think "either they're saving themselves or they're a loser"!

What are they losing? Maybe they are really shy.

Reply 90

Anonymous #10

I'ma bit disappointed with the use of the word loser on here, does a person have to be a loser if they have not lost they're virginity, for a reason other than saving themselves or religion etc. My brother is 22, he's a virgin, he's not against sex before marriage, he's not saving himself, he's just painfully shy and has trouble talking to girls, he's not anti-social, but wasn't hugely social til he started uni, he can even be quite a charmer when he wants to. I don't think he's a loser, he just hasn't found someone he cares about enough to do it with yet.

Reply 91

hapa_girl

7

Anonymous

what do you think of people in this agre range and older who are virgins.

doesn;t bother me. their decision. i never considered virginity as something easy to give away so more respect to those who are holding out for the perfect one

Reply 92

Elz

1

I'm 21 and I'm still a virgin and tbh, I really don't see the problem. It's the ones which generally aren't virgins who do see it as a problem, that are in the wrong. not me :p:

Reply 93

Guffy

high priestess fnord

yes you have shown me the light. i am going to dump my bf (because im scared he may dump me), never leave the house (thus eliminating the risk of being hit by a car/ mugged etc), never try any new food (i may be allergic to it and die)... etc. if i dont do anything then nothing bad will happen to me!!

You should also get your nutrition intravenously through a drip, in case you choke on your food whilst eating it.

Reply 94

squigaletta

I dislike the way people seem to assume that if you lose your virginity younger than this 'older age range' then it couldn't have been special for you. There are many people who are very much in a loving and valued relationship at a younger age, and its doing these people a disservice to assume that their first time was a result of peer pressure, just because they were lucky enough to find someone special earliar on.

Reply 95

username47781

20

I really hate it when people start making an issue out of people who are over 21 and still a virgin, i really don't see what the problem with it is.

Reply 96

Platinum Mech

12

Elz

I'm 21 and I'm still a virgin and tbh, I really don't see the problem. It's the ones which generally aren't virgins who do see it as a problem, that are in the wrong. not me :p:

I'm 19 and still a virgin, so I'm not far behind. :biggrin:

TBH, I'm not bothered by it either. Better to be more choosy about when you lose it and who you lose it to, to make your first time more special.

Reply 97

natsing

2

You lose your virginity, when you lose it, doesn't necessarily make you good, bad, or anything!
I was in the age range stated when I lost mine. For years I had poor self image and health problems, to be honest sex was the last thing on my mind! when I got better then it became an issue and I met someone, played the field a bit, and am very happily engaged, I don't regret losing it later in life, but also wouldn't have minded losing it earlier had the opportunity arisen. Its not about age, its about being happy with the decision!