Why is my Mum so thin?
My mum over the past year or so has lost a lot of weight, which may have been caused by stress, although tbh she should realise that its not normal to be that thin. She must only weigh about 6st.
I think she looks disgusting, but I cant really tell her that can I?
I think she looks disgusting, but I cant really tell her that can I?
How about instead of being such an arse, you actually try to talk to her and find out if she has a problem and get her some help?
Original post by DorianGrayism
How about instead of being such an arse, you actually try to talk to her and find out if she has a problem and get her some help?
She doesn't show her feelings. That's her problem. I have moved on in life. But if someone is ill then they should do something about it. I wonder who the adult is in my household. It certainly isn't her. She must be nearly 60.
Original post by Isambard Kingdom Brunel
She doesn't show her feelings. That's her problem. I have moved on in life. But if someone is ill then they should do something about it. I wonder who the adult is in my household. It certainly isn't her. .
If you have moved on with life then I am not sure why you bothered to post this useless thread.
Original post by DorianGrayism
If you have moved on with life then I am not sure why you bothered to post this useless thread.
She pretends there's nothing wrong with her. Even if she had cancer she wouldn't tell anyone. What can I do? We live in a household where we don't show our feelings, and although I do to normal people, I refuse to do so to my family.
Talk to her. Maybe there's something going on you don't know about? Work stress? Illness? If she's very short, 6st is alright but I'm guessing it's not from how you described it. Talk to someone in your close family? Siblings? Dad? Maybe they've noticed too? Don't tell her it's disgusting, just tell her you've noticed she's lost weight. If it's intentional, keep your mouth shut. You'll only offend her. If you want to do something, offer to help her with a meal/exercise plan so at least you know it's healthy. If it's because of some other reasons, try to figure out why and make it clear you're there to help her.
Original post by Isambard Kingdom Brunel
She pretends there's nothing wrong with her. Even if she had cancer she wouldn't tell anyone. What can I do? We live in a household where we don't show our feelings, and although I do to normal people, I refuse to do so to my family.
Then as I said before, I don't know why you are bothering to post this thread if you want to just watch your mum whither away.
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by flyyoufools
Talk to her. Maybe there's something going on you don't know about? Work stress? Illness? If she's very short, 6st is alright but I'm guessing it's not from how you described it. Talk to someone in your close family? Siblings? Dad? Maybe they've noticed too? Don't tell her it's disgusting, just tell her you've noticed she's lost weight. If it's intentional, keep your mouth shut. You'll only offend her. If you want to do something, offer to help her with a meal/exercise plan so at least you know it's healthy. If it's because of some other reasons, try to figure out why and make it clear you're there to help her.
She comes home from work and has like half a bad of crisps and a bit of toast.
If she knows she's underweight, then she should be eating lots of fatty stuff.
But a few years ago she was told by the doctor that she had high cholesterol and since then she has not eaten much. So basically I am worried this might be anorexia.
But still, it is not my job to interfere. I just wish I didn't have to come downstairs every now and then and see her sitting there. I get angry when I see people not helping themselves.
My mum tried to bring me up knowing (or at least having a good idea) I had depression, autism, and schizophrenia latterly, and yet it was taboo to mention any of it. If she had helped me when I was younger, I may have made something of my life. So it seems she doesn't like admitting illness.
(edited 10 years ago)
Original post by Isambard Kingdom Brunel
But still, it is not my job to interfere. I just wish I didn't have to come downstairs every now and then and see her sitting there. I get angry when I see people not helping themselves.
But still, it is not my job to interfere. I just wish I didn't have to come downstairs every now and then and see her sitting there. I get angry when I see people not helping themselves.
You're her son for crying out loud!
Stop being a little prat and help her.
Original post by Isambard Kingdom Brunel
She comes home from work and has like half a bad of crisps and a bit of toast.
If she knows she's underweight, then she should be eating lots of fatty stuff.
But a few years ago she was told by the doctor that she had high cholesterol and since then she has not eaten much. So basically I am worried this might be anorexia.
But still, it is not my job to interfere. I just wish I didn't have to come downstairs every now and then and see her sitting there.
If she knows she's underweight, then she should be eating lots of fatty stuff.
But a few years ago she was told by the doctor that she had high cholesterol and since then she has not eaten much. So basically I am worried this might be anorexia.
But still, it is not my job to interfere. I just wish I didn't have to come downstairs every now and then and see her sitting there.
Why not prepare food for her when she gets home from work? Or start eating together?
If she's underweight due to something mental like stress or depression then it's not that straightforward.
That could be the root.
You're her son, why wouldn't it be your job?
Well my mum came home from work today and made herself one sandwich and ate half a bag of crisps.
I don't understand, when you are around 6 stone, why you would only eat half a bag of crisps! It makes me so angry tbh.
Yesterday I bought a Rolo yoghurt for her and she hasn't ate it yet, trying to pretend that the Rolos might hurt her teeth
I don't understand, when you are around 6 stone, why you would only eat half a bag of crisps! It makes me so angry tbh.
Yesterday I bought a Rolo yoghurt for her and she hasn't ate it yet, trying to pretend that the Rolos might hurt her teeth
It makes me angry when people make excuses not to help their family.
She's your mum for crying out lout. Just because she's an adult, it doesn't mean she won't ever need help. Talk to her. You dont need to say its disgusting, say you've noticed she's lost a lot of weight and she looks unhealthily thin. Depending on what she says, encourage her to see a doctor.
If its a mental health problem, it isn't that easy to just eat more or just do things. She may not have admitted to herself that there is a problem and it might take someone else pointing it out, several times, sometimes you have to be forceful, almost cruel, to help someone to help themselves.
If its a physical problem that doesn't get treated until its too late, how will you feel knowing you could have done or said more to help?
You might not be a family that talks much about feelings, but when someone's health is involved, sometimes you just have to force yourself and each other out of your comfort zones to deal with the problem
On a practical level, you could prepare a meal for you to eat together when she comes home, and prepare her a lunch to take to work.
If you're not prepared to do anything but moan about it on tsr however, perhaps nothing will improve and you'll just have to watch your mum becoming thinner and unhealthier.
Help her to help herself.
She's your mum for crying out lout. Just because she's an adult, it doesn't mean she won't ever need help. Talk to her. You dont need to say its disgusting, say you've noticed she's lost a lot of weight and she looks unhealthily thin. Depending on what she says, encourage her to see a doctor.
If its a mental health problem, it isn't that easy to just eat more or just do things. She may not have admitted to herself that there is a problem and it might take someone else pointing it out, several times, sometimes you have to be forceful, almost cruel, to help someone to help themselves.
If its a physical problem that doesn't get treated until its too late, how will you feel knowing you could have done or said more to help?
You might not be a family that talks much about feelings, but when someone's health is involved, sometimes you just have to force yourself and each other out of your comfort zones to deal with the problem
On a practical level, you could prepare a meal for you to eat together when she comes home, and prepare her a lunch to take to work.
If you're not prepared to do anything but moan about it on tsr however, perhaps nothing will improve and you'll just have to watch your mum becoming thinner and unhealthier.
Help her to help herself.
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