Boyfriend getting mad at my overprotective mum

Hi everyone. I am really struggling at the moment so it would be helpful if you guys could give me some advice. I am 17 and my boyfriend is nearly 18, soon to be in uni. I have never been round his house because my mum isn't comfortable with it. I have been dating him for a year bare in mind. He is allowed to come to my house though. He used to be respectful of it and the whole situation wasn't such a big deal. Now things have gotten a lot more worse. He is really angry and upset about it and he keeps telling me that things need to change before he goes to uni but I don't know what to do because my mum still keeps saying no. He told me that we won't get to see each other at all when he's in uni if things are still like this and the relationship just won't work (me not being allowed to go round his house.) He then said that his parents are finding my mum really disrespectful which has upset me. And he keeps comparing our relationship to other relationships and saying that we a normal relationship would be allowed to have sleepovers by now. I have no idea what to do because I have tried to convince my mum and I just feel so guilty that I can't give my boyfriend the relationship he wants.

You'll need to stand up for yourself to your mum sooner or later. Until then it's hard to see a way forward and I can see why he's getting frustrated and losing respect for your mum.

I understand your bf because its frustrating into wanting to improve and progress in your relationship but theres something in the way. Do you know why your mum doesn't like him? Has she said why or is she just one of those people who don't like to see their own daughter happy? What sort of things does he say about your mum? Because the type of things he say can determine if he's a red flag.
Why does he think that you won't be able to see each other at all? While I understand what he's saying, its not like you won't see each other ever again.
It currently sounds like you mum is the problem. Has your mum met his parents? Maybe that could do something?

Hi everyone. I am really struggling at the moment so it would be helpful if you guys could give me some advice. I am 17 and my boyfriend is nearly 18, soon to be in uni. I have never been round his house because my mum isn't comfortable with it. I have been dating him for a year bare in mind. He is allowed to come to my house though. He used to be respectful of it and the whole situation wasn't such a big deal. Now things have gotten a lot more worse. He is really angry and upset about it and he keeps telling me that things need to change before he goes to uni but I don't know what to do because my mum still keeps saying no. He told me that we won't get to see each other at all when he's in uni if things are still like this and the relationship just won't work (me not being allowed to go round his house.) He then said that his parents are finding my mum really disrespectful which has upset me. And he keeps comparing our relationship to other relationships and saying that we a normal relationship would be allowed to have sleepovers by now. I have no idea what to do because I have tried to convince my mum and I just feel so guilty that I can't give my boyfriend the relationship he wants.

Well it sounds like it won't work out tbh. I can see your point about feeling pressured and not wanting to disobey your mum. But I can still kinda see his esp if he's been patient and respectful for a year+ he'll likely be feeling pretty insulted by the whole thing, his parents too possibly.

She likes him but she just isn’t keen on me going to this house. She says she’s lenient enough with letting him come over and into my bedroom. He also lives 20 minutes away by car so he isn’t the easiest to get to, I can’t just walk to his house which is also why she isn’t keen on it. I have told her I can get a bus but she doesn’t like that idea either. My bf calls my mum controlling and stuff.

Hi everyone. I am really struggling at the moment so it would be helpful if you guys could give me some advice. I am 17 and my boyfriend is nearly 18, soon to be in uni. I have never been round his house because my mum isn't comfortable with it. I have been dating him for a year bare in mind. He is allowed to come to my house though. He used to be respectful of it and the whole situation wasn't such a big deal. Now things have gotten a lot more worse. He is really angry and upset about it and he keeps telling me that things need to change before he goes to uni but I don't know what to do because my mum still keeps saying no. He told me that we won't get to see each other at all when he's in uni if things are still like this and the relationship just won't work (me not being allowed to go round his house.) He then said that his parents are finding my mum really disrespectful which has upset me. And he keeps comparing our relationship to other relationships and saying that we a normal relationship would be allowed to have sleepovers by now. I have no idea what to do because I have tried to convince my mum and I just feel so guilty that I can't give my boyfriend the relationship he wants.

Hi I understand how you feel i have a strict mum too, i also get why your boyfriend is annoyed at this because he wants to spend time with you but he also should respect your mums opinions and never blame you for any of this - threatening to end the relationship over it is unfair on you but he is probably just fed up. Bringing his parents opinion into this and comparing other couple to you both is not right as well and he should try to understand how you must be feeling too. Your mum should remember you are 17 now and are nearly an adult as well but if she is completely uncomfortable with it then at the end of the day it's her choice till your both 18. It will get better and hes not worth it at the end of the day if he's making you feel bad about it - hope you feel better.

Hi I understand how you feel i have a strict mum too, i also get why your boyfriend is annoyed at this because he wants to spend time with you but he also should respect your mums opinions and never blame you for any of this - threatening to end the relationship over it is unfair on you but he is probably just fed up. Bringing his parents opinion into this and comparing other couple to you both is not right as well and he should try to understand how you must be feeling too. Your mum should remember you are 17 now and are nearly an adult as well but if she is completely uncomfortable with it then at the end of the day it's her choice till your both 18. It will get better and hes not worth it at the end of the day if he's making you feel bad about it - hope you feel better.

I'm a bit confused why it's not right for the guys parents opinion to be brought into it while the OP's mum's opinion must be respected?