I'm an average girl, I'm not pretty and I have a boring personality and I don't want to hurt anyone. I've never had any experiences of dating or relationships and I went to co-ed school and I didn't really speak to any of the guys there because most seemed immature.
Well this is a long story, so I'll try to keep things as short as possible. I started last year(doing a female dominated course but there are also a lot of guys) and I met my first male friend. He's so sweet it's unreal. He's quite small(a bit smaller than me and I consider myself small) and he looks cute. He is a really sweet person too. Like he's so kind, holds the door for everyone, always makes sure everyone is ok, always smiles. It seems weird but I always wanted to hug him, I didn't get to in the end. He seems nervous a lot of the time with everyone and is really quiet and shy. I don't think he has any other female friends. He went to an all boys school and I'm the only girl in the course he properly speaks to.
Near the end of the year, he asked me in private if I wanted to take things further and I was hesitant so I said no. Now I feel really bad. We didn't talk after that and he seemed really scared. I think it was a big thing for him to start talking to me, never mind to get to the stage of asking. I admit I was thinking what would people think if a girl that looks 20 years old is with a guy that looks 13.
Last time I saw him I was during exam time on a bus and he was walking to the library with the usual smile on his face. Now I'm upset that we haven't spoken in the holidays ever since, and I feel that I lost a friend. How do I make things ok again in terms of friendship? I've never been in a situation before. Like I said I'm a simple person and I don't want to hurt anyone.