should I friendzone?

So, I was dumped just over a month ago, and it was an intense relationship- someone I spent all my time with etc etc...
Basically, since the break-up, two of my friends have shown that they want to be something more. The thing is, I do like them both, but I'm scared of getting hurt again.

One of them has been messaging me every night, really sexual stuff, but hasn't been approaching me much in person. I think he's worried I'll reject him if he asks me out, and he's been on the brink of it on at least three occasions. He's a really sensitive person, but I don't feel much of a connection with him tbh.

The other one fancied me before my relationship, and was really good mates with my ex, but has since stopped talking to him. I know he likes me, and he makes excuses to talk to me, but I know that he's really unlikely to ask me out too. He's really clever and cute, but finds emotions difficult to read.

Thoughts??

Reply 1

High Stakes

I don't mind if a girl friend zones someone without realising it, because they forged such a friendship that it would be inconceivable to try and change that. But conscientiously friend zoning people, you know have feelings for you is just petty -be honest with them, and don't let them get their hopes up. What you're doing is being emotionally selfish.

Reply 2

Zarek

Feels like these would be rebound relationship options more than anything else. Only you can decide if you're up for it. You don't really need to friendzone till they make a definitive move.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by High Stakes

So cut them both off before they say anything?- wouldn't that be needlessly hurtful though, I don't want to end up hurting either of them if I can help it

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by Zarek

Feels like these would be rebound relationship options more than anything else. Only you can decide if you're up for it. You don't really need to friendzone till they make a definitive move.

That's kinda what I'm worrying about, I just hope they don't think I'm leading them on (the first one more so than the second)- I'm good friends with both of them

Reply 5

Zarek

If your not up for it you can still try to be friends. Be aware though that guys wait for girls they fancy the pants off to become single again and then pounce. Avoid anything that can be construed as a date. Really you only need to friendzone if they don't grasp it. By the way not too sure about the methods of guy 1.