Feel too shy at uni :/
I haven't made many friends at uni and I feel like the first year is almost finishing.
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
Original post by eat146
I haven't made many friends at uni and I feel like the first year is almost finishing.
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
Right, I genuinely urge you to watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ks-_Mh1QhMc It's rather long, but personally, it's helped me tremendously overcome my social "anxiety" in the past :3
I think sometimes there comes a point in your life when you need to push yourself to your limits, that include out of your safe bubble
Try out a few power poses in the toilet, practice introducing yourself and go for it!! I don't think you realise how many shy people there are in uni, the trick is to come across as confident and then eventually you will become confident. It's like magic!!!
Good luck, hope this helps~
Original post by eat146
I haven't made many friends at uni and I feel like the first year is almost finishing.
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
You're 18. At some point your life you're going to have to stop making excuses for yourself and just get on with it. As you say, if you don't do something about it then things will never change, and you'll live a lonely, sad, unfulfilled life full of regrets and missed opportunities.
One day you have to leave childhood behind and start acting like an adult.
How about today.
Original post by eat146
I haven't made many friends at uni and I feel like the first year is almost finishing.
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
I'm exactly the same as you especially the part about not knowing what to say to people. You just have to keep trying and push yourself to go to societies. Maybe try to join a sports team? It's more informal and you automatically have something to talk about. I know it's difficult.
Original post by cole-slaw
You're 18. At some point your life you're going to have to stop making excuses for yourself and just get on with it. As you say, if you don't do something about it then things will never change, and you'll live a lonely, sad, unfulfilled life full of regrets and missed opportunities.
One day you have to leave childhood behind and start acting like an adult.
How about today.
One day you have to leave childhood behind and start acting like an adult.
How about today.
Like a katana through the sternum.
Original post by eat146
I haven't made many friends at uni and I feel like the first year is almost finishing.
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
I really want to join societies and go to their events but I feel too shy and unconfident to just turn up on my own. I'm quite a shy and unconfident person and sometimes I never know what to talk about with people.
If I don't do something about it now I know that my situation will never change and I won't meet new people.
How can I be more open and outgoing when joining societies and going to events?
Hi eat146
Firstly: I am impressed that you have 1. spotted a problem and 2. are seeking a solution (you would be surprised how many people don't even bother and just let the situation get worse).
I am a second year archaeology student at BU who suffers from anixtey (so hopefully these tips might help).
Most people are surprisingly nice, really
The key to getting them talking is to find something they are interested in and ask them about that. People love to talk about what interests them, so if you want to get chatting...
Going to societies or out anywhere the first time is scary (I struggle every time I do something new). But here is the thing...you want to go out. So why are you letting your brain stop you? You are in charge. You decide, not your brain. Make a deal with yourself that you will go out to an event or society for an hour. Thats all. One hour. And then do it.
Often as not by the end of the hour you will have found someone to talk to (see tip one) and you will begin to enjoy yourself. once you have done it once you can do it again (because you have already done the scary part- and the person you talked to last time will probably be there again
). Shyness will go as you get more friends and get used to the situation (you don't need many just a few good ones). Just ask people questions: hello where are you from? Whats it like there? What do you like about X? Like I said, get them to talk. You will learn a lot about them, get a reputation as being a great listener and start to make friends.
https://microsites.bournemouth.ac.uk/undergraduate/2014/11/10/where-do-i-go-for-advice-and-support/
That is a blog on feeling worried about uni. It is well written and worth a read. Honestly, try not to worry. You are so much braver than you think!
All the best
Amy
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