Relationship at work is complicated

So basically, there is a girl I work with, we are both the same age, and in the last 2 months I have started to like her more and more. But about a month ago I started getting the impression that she didn't feel the same so I backed off. Then 2 weeks later she texted me asking about a night out we had discussed. When it came to it, the night out was with my friends and I and I invited her along. While we were out, my friends told me that she kept "checking" me out and every time she looked at me she smiled. Then when the night ended she stayed at mine, we cuddled, held hands etc (she asked me to cuddle her, and she was curling into me). While we were in that situation I asked her if I could take her on a date, but said she wasn't sure because of everyone at work and what they would say and she doesn't know if she wants to or not.

We have spoken once since then, during which I told her that I was serious about what I said and the offer will still stand. I'm leaving my job in 3 weeks and would like to ask her if I can take her out then. But I still don't know how she feels about me. Everything that was said/done when we was out together implies that she likes me back, but everything that's happened since then make it seem like she doesn't.

She hasn't texted me back in 2 days. Where do I go from here because I don't want to keep texting her because it will seem creepy and annoying. So what now?

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 1

kpizzle17

4

Just ask her, what have you got to lose if you're leaving in 3 weeks?

Reply 2

Allen94

OP

Original post by kpizzle17

Just ask her, what have you got to lose if you're leaving in 3 weeks?

I have asked we and she said she wasn't sure if she wanted to. Also we are good friends, I just want it to be more, but I don't know if she wants the same or to just stick to being friends.

Reply 3

kpizzle17

4

You're not going to know unless you ask though. If you like her that much then it's worth the risk. If you're good friends then you'll be able to salvage the friendship if she's not interested in that way, it'll just be a bit difficult for a while.

Speaking from experience here!

Reply 4

Allen94

OP

Original post by kpizzle17

You're not going to know unless you ask though. If you like her that much then it's worth the risk. If you're good friends then you'll be able to salvage the friendship if she's not interested in that way, it'll just be a bit difficult for a while.

Speaking from experience here!

so what do i do? i don't want to keep badgering on at her and annoying her, but i was thinking of waiting until i left and then asking her out?

Reply 5

kpizzle17

4

Original post by Allen94

so what do i do? i don't want to keep badgering on at her and annoying her, but i was thinking of waiting until i left and then asking her out?

If it were me, I'd carry on chatting with her, keep in contact and keep it casual. Sometime just before or after you leave, approach her and ask her out. Make it clear that you do really like her but that you appreciate her friendship and if she's not interested, that you'd like to stay friends. A male friend did this to me and although I didn't reciprocate his feelings, we retained our friendship and still get on very well.

I'm a firm believer in 'you don't ask, you don't get', and have always gone for it with people I like. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't but I knew where I stood and could move forward in whichever direction :smile:

Reply 6

username47781

20

If you don't ask then you will never know.

Reply 7

Allen94

OP

Original post by kpizzle17

If it were me, I'd carry on chatting with her, keep in contact and keep it casual. Sometime just before or after you leave, approach her and ask her out. Make it clear that you do really like her but that you appreciate her friendship and if she's not interested, that you'd like to stay friends. A male friend did this to me and although I didn't reciprocate his feelings, we retained our friendship and still get on very well.

I'm a firm believer in 'you don't ask, you don't get', and have always gone for it with people I like. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't but I knew where I stood and could move forward in whichever direction :smile:

The problem with that is, she is very hard to keep the conversation flowing with. Most of the time she either forget to reply and the conversation ends, or she just decides not to reply, i can't then message again because that seems a little too keen, My only option to speak to her more is to do more shifts until i leave and go about it that way? i don't want to keep texting and come across like I'm badgering her.

Relationship at work is complicated

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